Pregnancy Check-in

KH826 · January 2014

How is everyone doing/feeling? Any updates? Please remind us how far along you are and when your EDD is!

QOTW: What has been the biggest challenge of your pregnancy so far? What are you most apprehensive about in terms of your pregnancy?

kboydbowman · January 2014

Feeling pretty good. First midwife visit on Wednesday, which the wife and I are looking forward to. Sincerely doubt there will be an ultrasound, but hopefully we'll at least get to hear the heartbeat with Doppler (fingers crossed). I am 9 weeks and 5 days, EDD is August 6th.

Apprehensive: Money and time.

trisholio · January 2014

Good morning everyone. I really don't want to complain, but oh my goodness I am so tired these days! I was the type of person that didn't sleep well before, so I thought I would be used to be a little tired. Whewie, this is not what I expected! I am glad to have 'pregnancy' symptoms but I honestly didn't think they would start this early. I will be 6 weeks tomorrow and have my first actual appointment with my RE on Wednesday for our first ultra sound. I am assuming we will only have one or two more appointments with our RE and then graduate to our OBGYN. We haven't actually picked an obgyn yet, oops. I kept thinking we had lots of time and now it's here!

QOTD: I kind of already answered it, I think the exhaustion is the worst part so far. I am lucky to not have any morning sickness (knock on wood). I am thankful for that!

KH826 · January 2014

18w6d over here - EDD is June 3rd.

I haven't gotten sick since last Thursday, so that is a huge plus. It was so strange that for about 4 days I couldn't keep anything down, and then it just stopped. Maybe I did have some kind of a bug, but I had no other symptoms... I guess it will stay a mystery. Sleeping has started to be a challenge again. I was awake every hour last night -- a few times to go to the bathroom and a few more times because I couldn't get comfortable.

Last night I had a small meltdown because I feel like I am not showing enough for how far along I am. I feel like I popped out a bit around 15 or 16 weeks, but that I look the same since then. I know it is not rational, but I had a little cry while making dinner last night because I was convinced baby wasn't growing. I am ridiculous.

T-minus 9 days until our anatomy scan! So looking forward to seeing baby again, and to hopefully finding out the sex! I hope, I hope!

QOTW: Can I pick 3 biggest challenges? HAHA... I am crazy, please indulge me...

Weight Gain - I lost 110 lbs 3 years ago, and for the first time in my life was happy with my appearance. Being a size 6 was amazing, and I felt like a totally new person. Through TTC, IVF and now pregnancy, I have gained a lot of weight. I am not happy with it, but there is not a lot that I can do about it at this point besides try to be as healthy as possible for the rest of my pregnancy. My blood pressure is good and I have no other risk factors according to my doctor. Really the biggest struggle is looking in the mirror and feeling like I have some how failed by allowing myself to get to the size that I currently am. It is also making it harder to accept/embrace my pregnancy body b/c I can't seem to separate that in my mind from just being/feeling fat. I sincerely hope that changes as pregnancy progresses and my bump grows. I am anxious for that.
Worry/Fear - I am a worrier by nature. I am a caregiver in terms of my personality and my role within my family. I like to take care of people and I always worry about everyone else. Well, I have never known worry like I now have for this baby. I try really hard to keep it all in perspective and not go nuts, but I am just constantly worried that something is going to go wrong and I won't know/won't have any control over it. I thought it would get better after hitting the 12 week mark, since statistically odds are that everything is fine and will continue to be fine. However, I am still so anxious about the well-being of this baby. I tell myself now that once I start feeling regular movement and I am showing more, then I will be more at ease, but I don't know if that is true.
Complaining v. Vocalizing experience - So, to sort of go hand-in-hand with my worry, I feel the need to talk about every little thing that I am feeling/experiencing as sort of a way to document/be accountable for what is going on with this pregnancy. I don't mean to complain, and I have started saying to my wife "I am so not complaining, but... this is what I am feeling..." The main people that I seem to do this with are my wife, my OB and sometimes my mother or my mother-in-law. But now I am really concerned that I have become a complainer, and I would HATE that! With that being said, when my back hurts, I am going to tell me wife, when I am nauseous, I am going to tell my wife, when I get a weird little shooting pain down my side, I am going to tell my wife. Not because I wan't her to feel badly about any of it, or because I expect her to do anything about it, but because I want someone other than me to know what is happening inside my body. Sort of like a gut check -- "this is normal/ok, right?"...

So those are my challenges/apprehensions. I know a lot of it is "normal" (have I mentioned I hate that word?) for a first time pregnant person, but it seems overwhelming to me sometimes...

2MamazInSeattle · January 2014

@kayboydbowman - I bet your first appointment will be awesome! Good luck!

@mamosey - That shower cake is adorable! Thanks for sharing!

@trisholio - The fatigue is crushing isn't it?? And crazy. That and boob pain were consistent for me in both my pregnancies - and the m/s started around week 7/8 for me. I hope you continue to escape that! Rest when you can and just know your limits...and hang in there!

@KH826 - Your worries are so familiar! I am the oldest child too, and though I've done buckets of therapy to let go of my caretaking/worrying, it's a hard nut to crack. I too lost 100 lbs and feel mega fat starting this pregnancy at 20 lbs more than I was a year ago due to TTC for the year, stress etc. so I get that. And - on the 'complaining' front - I often say "Not a complaint, just an observation" - to be clear to whoever I'm talking to that I don't need anything, expect any 'fix' etc, but that, to your point, I just want a gut check or for someone to know what is up with me. Do you have a pregnancy journal? It might help you to have a place to freely write/complain all you want without fear of imposing on others or being judged. Just an idea! It can be a great outlet, and then acts as a nice record of your pregnancy for your baby one day! And for me, a lot of times I end up hashing things out so when I do talk to J or whoever about it, it's a clearer, organized thought and not a rambling stream of consciousness (I have that gift in spades - I'm definitely an external processor). Anyhow, I do think you're "normal" - but it doesn't necessarily make it feel any better on the inside. I get that.

AFM, I'm 7w5d and due on 8/20/14.

I had another MFM appointment on Friday which went great. Can I tell you how happy I am with this practice?? I am getting midwife level of attention, time and thoughtfulness from high-risk OBs. It's amazing. So this appointment involved an u/s (baby measured well, h/b up to 146 which the average for that time is 136) which was great. J couldn't be there so that made me a little nervous but all was well. I then had an appt. with the nurse practitioner who is also a Certified Nurse Midwife (but doesn't deliver now but has in the past) - apparently 3 of the 5 NPs in this practice are also CNMs. She must have asked me 5 times if I had any other questions, concerns, etc. She chatted with me about my loss and was very reassuring. I had a pelvic exam too, and she'd clearly read my history and knew all of what was up with me in terms of my Lovenox,etc. Loved. It. Next appointment is 9w u/s and check-in on 1/15. Then 11w is the NT scan, Mat21 test on 1/31. Then I go to monthly, but she said "Oh, our triage nurse had an ultrasound station - you can come in any time between appointments for a quick u/s to reassure you. Don't hesitate." Um, wow.

QOTW: Loss loss loss. Honestly, I have been really struggling with this pregnancy after my loss last year. I hate to say it, but I've been kinda mad at that loss for ruining the joy/happiness of pregnancy. Last year at this time, I was so confident and happy! I would talk about our baby as if he was going to be born. This time, I still say "if we ever have a baby..." and caution anyone who talks as if this baby will be born "oh it's still early...we don't know if we will have a baby or not" etc. Can you say Debbie Downer? Even though once hb and growth are shown the m/c rate is less than 5%... Last time I was worried about weight gain, giving the kid a name that suddenly became too popular, etc. - this time I figure I will clean up any gain afterwards and heck, we can call this kid "Bob" for all I care. Been feeling a lot of sadness and like I can't connect to this little baby *at all* - last time I was madly in love with my baby by now. I suppose it's a defense mechanism. This time I feel like I have an unknown passenger in there. I hope that changes. If I don't feel better in a couple weeks I may find a counselor who specializes in PAGL, but I'm giving it a little time to see if I snap out of it. The hormones aren't helping I'm sure.

We aren't going to announce until around 23 weeks which also feels joyless. Just feels way too risky to do it before then, even though our loss was at 16w we want to get through the anatomy scan, etc. Our 1 -year wedding anniversary is 4/20, so we thought maybe we could do a little play on that "last year we were doing this (wedding pix); this year we are doing this (u/s or belly shot). But we'll see...I really liked knowing so many people in our lives were rooting for us last time after 1st tri! But, this time, all our close family/friends know and that will have to be enough rooting for now.

Apparently I am a sad sap today. Sorry about that!

healz413 · January 2014

2MamazInSeattle said:

AFM, I'm 7w5d and due on 8/20/14.

My baby brother was born on August 20. He is one of the sweetest, best people in the world.

ball.and.chain · January 2014

13w1d, EDD 7/13/14

I'm doing pretty well, considering I haven't seen or heard the baby since 12/11 and not seeing or hearing a heartbeat makes me worry about whether everything is OK in there. NT scan is Wednesday (as well as my blood draw for Mat21, a meeting with the genetic counselor, and an OB appointment -- I'm going to be at the doctor's office for HOURS). I can't decide whether to be excited (we get to see the baby! it will look like a baby! we'll have some more information about how healthy it is!) or terrified. I guess I'm a little of both.

Physically, I'm doing well. Gagginess has all but subsided, fatigue has lifted a bit, and I've had some headaches but nothing terrible. Now that the holidays are over and all the "bad" food is out of the house, I've been trying to eat better and am happy with my efforts this week. I got a heart rate monitor for Christmas and took it to the gym on Sunday where I learned that the pace I've been walking is a little slow...so I upped it a bit and felt like I got a pretty good workout, considering.

QOTW: I guess for me this is fairly obvious -- on account of my history, I am terrified of another miscarriage and have a hard time believing this baby will be healthy and will survive to term. I am trying to take things one day at a time and not worry about things that haven't happened yet. It's a constant battle but my therapist and psychiatrist both think I'm doing well, anxiety-wise -- how much I have myself and therapy to thank and how much Prozac is anyone's guess, but progress is a good thing.

@KH826, as much as I am grateful to be pregnant at all, as you know I also struggle with the weight gain for the same reasons. I look forward to having a recognizable bump so I can at least more like a pregnant woman and less like a blob.

KH826 · January 2014

@kboydbowman - good luck at your first appointment on Wednesday!

@Trisholio - Pregnancy tired is really unlike any other kind of tired, and in my experience it just doesn't matter how much sleep you get some days. Just rest when you can and know that it will get a bit better at some point. I still have plenty of mega tired days, and I have had to learn my new limits, but overall my experience was that after 11-12 weeks the insane exhaustion let up a little.

@mamosey - Super cute shower cake!

@Flygirl1228 - Still thinking of you and Baby B! I hope that Friday comes quickly and you have no problem rearranging your schedule to be at the appointment.

@2mamazinseattle - So glad to hear you are getting such good care and attention at the MFM. I know you weren't thrilled with having to go to the MFM in the first place, so very glad to hear that so far it has been a good experience and you are getting the care and piece of mind that you need. Also, thanks for taking the time to relate to all of my anxieties (I know there are many!) -- you so often say just the right thing to make me feel a bit better, and I greatly appreciate that. I have thought about starting a pregnancy journal, but haven't yet... it seems a little late now to start, but I should still start doing it.

@KLeigh 1 - Good luck at your appointment on Wednesday and glad you are feeling better!

@ball.and.chain - The NT scan was my favorite ultrasound so far. It was a longer one and we got a nice long look at all sorts of things (arms, legs, head)... and baby really did look like a baby then. I hope you have a fantastic appointment on Wednesday! So, will you be finding out the sex of the baby with the Mat21 test? How long does it take for those results to come back? Also, some days now I feel pregnant and some days I feel like a blob. I think I am in that transitional phase... it honestly depends on the outfit I am wearing some days. Today, unfortunately, is a blob day. I am wearing a new wrap dress that is a little too big (bought it in a large to try to allow for growth) and my bump feels less defined and more lumpy. Not my best look...

AmandaG47 · January 2014

Today marks 31w3d for our girls. We have another appointment with the ob on Tuesday. I keep having moments of "oh sh!t, this is really happening." In a very very positive way that is. I feel somewhat like the best Christmas in the world is coming up. I really hope and pray they stay inside until at least 35 weeks, although our goal is 36. That would mean, most likely, little probability of nicu time and being able to take them home right away. Also, it would work out better with my work and visitors who are flying across the country to visit when they are born. My wife just stopped working, and I am SO glad for it. I feel like I can rest a little easier knowing she can take it easy as need be at this point. Especially because she has had a lot of pain in this pregnancy.

QOTD: For me, being the NGP, I feel like a roller coaster of emotions. Elated for my daughters to get here one moment, then sobbing the next because I get to take off MINIMAL time at work (like a week). It is not quite how I always imagined having children (I really wish I could have more time with them as newborns before working again) but that's not to say there are not great things about being a NGP. My role just feels more complicated than I would like. I imagine it will feel better once they are in my arms, but in all honestly, this pregnancy has been pretty difficult. (I don't want to give the wrong impression, I LOVE my babies already and have loved seeing my wife in such a different role than she normally takes on, and there have been so many wonderful aspects of the pregnancy as well, it is just also difficult).

Jazibel · January 2014

Good Morning All,

I'm 23 weeks and 6 days today. Due 4/29/14.

I'm feeling pretty good. Baby Owen just started hopping around in my belly which is always reassuring. I've been sleeping at night and only getting up to pee in the early morning, or right around the time I get up (which is a miracle!!). Other than the terrible back pain I had last week - which is now much better, I have some weird pelvic pains/pressure especially when I exert myself in any capacity. It's a little frustrating when I go the gym I can't do anything on the treadmill above a crawl without getting BH contractions or cramps. So crawl is all I do, I think my heart rate goes up more typing on the Bump. :P

I'm currently up 103lbs from where I was when we got our first BFP 3/2010. I've lost some during that time, and gained some. Long story short though I have a completely different body than my pre-pregnancy body. I showed friends pictures once this past summer, they have only known me since being pregnant with Kaden and I don't think they recognized me... Sigh.

It's a struggle because I have chosen having kids (and having them close together) over focusing on losing weight, and now during this pregnancy every time I step on the scale I've gained and it has placed a strain on my body. I try to remind myself that I can lose the weight again - it may take a while.. But I will get to a healthy weight (for me) and be a fit mom. For right now I try to accept how I look, though I often feel fat (or if I see pictures I am astounded by how different I look than I think I should). Anyway. My babies - totally worth it. :-)

QOTD: I bled considerably before I got my BFP (thought it was a light period over several days, even used pads/tampons). I continued to spot for the first couple of weeks - it was nerve racking. I eventually stopped breastfeeding my then 1 year old and the spotting stopped. I was very nervous at first because of the spotting (and having a previous loss).

Since having had several u/s and feeling the baby move I feel more confident. I still worry about things (though I will admit to a lesser degree then when I was pregnant with Kaden). If I don't feel the baby move for a while, or if I get random little pains. Every once in a while I worry about there being something wrong with baby - which I hope and pray there is not (and just try to focus on hoping for a healthy baby and healthy birth).

Speaking of birth, I am most concerned now about having to have a hospital birth. I really want a homebirth, and just don't know how we'll afford it.

EV is very against a hospital birth, but I feel like we need to begin making steps in one direction or another. For a hospital birth, I'm concerned I won't be comfortable relaxing into having natural labor with people coming and going, and needing to get monitored every hour. I am afraid I won't get 1 of the 2 rooms with a tub, and that if I don't progress fast enough that interventions will be pressured on us. I'm also concerned about the newborn care, I really liked having Kaden in my or EV's arms, and checked on the bed next to us by the midwife. We're vac. free so I don't want to have to fight medical professionals on those accounts. Anyway I know that my perspective is not the "norm" for our current day in age - but its how we feel (as hippie as we are ;-) and I worry....

Pinkspark · January 2014

Hello everyone!

I'm 19w5d with twins, and the EDD is 5/28/14

I'm a bundle of nerves this week! Due to the snowstorm last friday, my OB cancelled my 2nd attempt at the 3 hour glucose for tomorrow. I'm really hopeful that I don't toss my cookies all over the floor again, and to not have GD. I'm very anxious to hear the babies heartbeats since I can finally feel them moving around in there!

On friday I'll be going to the local childrens hospital to get an U/S, MRI (Which I am calling about tonight because I don't know if it's such a good idea to get), and fetal heart ecco done for my boy- Baby A. Please send good vibes for no small chin issues and no clubbed feet, and no heart issues! I just want to finally enjoy being pregnant! I feel like every hurdle we pass with him, there is always another issue that crops up and it's slowly killing me.

Can't my babies just be chill in there with no issues?!

QOTW:

Definitely the stress of having all the testing with Baby A. It took me so long to not feel gross for this pregnancy, and ever since the NT test- it's been terrible. Waiting for CVS results, microarray results.. etc. I am SO THANKFUL that everything came back clean, but the anatomy scan gave us some more things to worry about! I really just need some good news on friday. Argh!

I'm also worried that I'm not putting on enough weight. I always used to struggle with my weight, and now that I need to gain.. I am having a heck of a time! My OB doesn't seem too concerned, but I'd rather be safe than sorry and keep packing away the pounds so I can give my babies the best chances for being good weights!

redrockmama · January 2014

Hi all. I wish I had time to respond to everyone, but it's a busy month at work so I only have a few minutes.

13w6d (I think) EDD is July 7th although our midwife suggested it really should be July 11th

We met with our midwife Thursday evening and finally got to hear the little heartbeat. It was so great! She found it right away after telling us not to worry if it took a few minutes. I think even she was surprised with how quickly she found it. It was about 130ish at first and then went up to about 150 for a second. I'm looking forward to the next ultrasound in about 7 weeks or so. We don't want to find out the sex of the baby and it's so funny to me how many people just can't handle it. I'm just excited to see Bubbles again and make sure everything looks healthy.

I agree that actually looking pregnant would be nice. Apparently my uterus is still pretty low, I was shocked at how low. I look like I've gained a few pounds and wonder if I'll ever look pregnant.

QOTW: By far the hardest thing is just being happy. We were so excited to have a baby and so thrilled that I got pregnant so quickly, but the day after we got the BFP my stepmom had emergency spinal surgery due to cancer and it's been downhill since then. I want so badly to be happy and enjoy the pregnancy and getting ready for the baby, but it is so incredibly hard right now. She only has 1-2 weeks to live now and my dad is a mess. I hope that in 6 months we are all in a little bit of a better place. Watching her die and my dad suffering is emotionally exhausting and I feel like I have nothing left for me, the baby or my wife.

Sorry to be a downer, it's been a rough week, couple of months really, but especially the last 4 days.

twobrooklynmoms · January 2014

Today DW is 5w2d. We feel so fortunate to have gotten a BFP on our first try, but afraid its too good to be true. We were out of town when we got the result and haven't been able to get to the dr for a beta test because of the crazy weather in NYC the last few days. Hopefully we can go tomorrow. Maybe after the doctor confirms with a blood test or u/s I will feel more secure.... keeping fingers crossed for now!

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