Parenting after a Loss

Mamas of toddlers: potty learning?

Did anyone do a more gentle approach to potty learning? DD has started to show some serious interest when we go, and has begun telling me when she goes, so I'd like to give it a try. She's 16 months, and of course the Montessori method says I've only got another month and a half of "sensitive potty learning" time left... go figure. But she's still not walking much, just a few steps here and there, and that's been a big stumbling block in getting this started (she can't climb onto the potty on her own, can't take off her own clothes because she doesn't spend a lot of time getting comfortable on her feet). She's also a skinny minnie, which makes sizing trainers hard. 

Care to share your experiences?
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Re: Mamas of toddlers: potty learning?

  • I will share my experience and just add the disclaimer that it's our own story and may or may not work for you :)

    DS started showing interest in the potty shortly before he turned 2, so I started talking about it, taking him into the bathroom with me whenever I went, I bought Elmo's Potty Time DVD (he was super into Elmo at the time). For a couple months I just let him watch the DVD and really talked about it a lot, nothing too crazy. Then over this past summer, he started telling me when he was wet or pooped in his diaper, so I started letting him wear underwear for a couple hours a day - sometimes he peed/pooped in them and sometimes he didn't - but I wanted him to see them and get used to them. I made sure to buy his favorite character underwear and then I'd say things like "We don't pee or poop on Woody/Buzz, Lightning McQueen, etc".

    In August (so DS was 2.5), his daycare told us to start sending him in pull-ups and they were going to familiarize him with pulling his pants up/down and sitting on the toilet. We reinforced that at home. We never did a little potty, we just did a potty ring on our toilet and got a stool. I feel like daycare really "took the reigns" at that point, but they took him every 30 min-1 hour and he really got the hang of it quickly. About 4 weeks into the pull-ups, they told me to send him in underwear. He had a few accidents the first two weeks (5 accidents the first week, 2 accidents the second week), and by week 3 no more accidents.

    I feel like we REALLY eased into it and we really let him kind of take charge (or at least in his mind, he was in charge of the process) and we really praised him, encouraged him, told him how much of a "big boy" he was and he really thrived on that. He is fully PT'ed now and has been since September. Again though, I really feel like daycare kind of led this for us and really helped, which I am so thankful for. We just made sure to do whatever they were doing while we were at home too and it really stuck with him. Over the course of the last 4 or so months, I can count on one hand how many accidents he has had.

    Oh and also, pooping on the potty took quite a while. He wouldn't poop in his underwear, but we'd put a pull-up on him for nap time and he'd poop then like he was waiting for it...LOL. Honestly with the poop thing what worked the best was getting him a book to "read" on the potty and offering him candy if he actually went in the potty.

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    BFP # 1 - 12/19/09 EDD 08/27/10 - D&C 1/26/10 @ 9w5d

    BFP # 2 - 06/05/10 EDD 02/17/11, DS1 born on 2/14/11

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    BFP # 5 - 09/14/13 EDD 05/28/14, DS2 born on 5/22/14 

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  • I will share my experience and just add the disclaimer that it's our own story and may or may not work for you :)

    DS started showing interest in the potty shortly before he turned 2, so I started talking about it, taking him into the bathroom with me whenever I went, I bought Elmo's Potty Time DVD (he was super into Elmo at the time). For a couple months I just let him watch the DVD and really talked about it a lot, nothing too crazy. Then over this past summer, he started telling me when he was wet or pooped in his diaper, so I started letting him wear underwear for a couple hours a day - sometimes he peed/pooped in them and sometimes he didn't - but I wanted him to see them and get used to them. I made sure to buy his favorite character underwear and then I'd say things like "We don't pee or poop on Woody/Buzz, Lightning McQueen, etc".

    In August (so DS was 2.5), his daycare told us to start sending him in pull-ups and they were going to familiarize him with pulling his pants up/down and sitting on the toilet. We reinforced that at home. We never did a little potty, we just did a potty ring on our toilet and got a stool. I feel like daycare really "took the reigns" at that point, but they took him every 30 min-1 hour and he really got the hang of it quickly. About 4 weeks into the pull-ups, they told me to send him in underwear. He had a few accidents the first two weeks (5 accidents the first week, 2 accidents the second week), and by week 3 no more accidents.

    I feel like we REALLY eased into it and we really let him kind of take charge (or at least in his mind, he was in charge of the process) and we really praised him, encouraged him, told him how much of a "big boy" he was and he really thrived on that. He is fully PT'ed now and has been since September. Again though, I really feel like daycare kind of led this for us and really helped, which I am so thankful for. We just made sure to do whatever they were doing while we were at home too and it really stuck with him. Over the course of the last 4 or so months, I can count on one hand how many accidents he has had.

    Oh and also, pooping on the potty took quite a while. He wouldn't poop in his underwear, but we'd put a pull-up on him for nap time and he'd poop then like he was waiting for it...LOL. Honestly with the poop thing what worked the best was getting him a book to "read" on the potty and offering him candy if he actually went in the potty.

    Thank you for sharing! I honestly feel like now probably isn't the best time. I'm going to continue to let her familiarize herself with the potty and give her words and signs for when she goes (she keeps pointing down there every time she goes), but I don't feel like we have the language or the motor skills to really let her take charge, like you said, and I feel like that's important. I want her to lead on this, not me.
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    imageimageimageTTC since 07/11 | natural m/c 08/11 | BFP 12/6/2011 | Elinor Anna born 8/18/2012 | BFP #2 1/16/2014
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  • I'm not even sure that I would attempt to try before she is walking, but that's my 2 cents. I was also of the option that it couldn't be done without the LO being able to pull up and down pants, but many LOs in DSs room go in the potty and still need help with pants. Of course I don't have any experience about any of this since DS will happily sit in poop without a peep to anybody. Plus, for our particular case we will be needing to do a 3 day PT regime (Just a preference for us due to child care) and will not attempt it until DS shows interest (he did show interest, but it happened around the holidays while we were traveling, and that ship has sailed)
    Yeah, that's what I'm thinking, too. She might be ready to "talk" about it but she's certainly not there gross motor wise.

    GL with DS when the time comes!
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    imageimageimageTTC since 07/11 | natural m/c 08/11 | BFP 12/6/2011 | Elinor Anna born 8/18/2012 | BFP #2 1/16/2014
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