FTMs- Are you scared to give birth??

LKHoffa · January 2014

I figured I would ask since it's still 6 months(ish!) away! But are any of you ladies scared already to give birth?? Be honest!

mrs_drc_rn · January 2014

I voted no way, but by no means do I think it will be a piece of cake! I don't feel scared though, just generally excited for everything I'm going to experience.

LVCK · January 2014

I voted not yet. So many other things to stress about before then.

Valie18 · January 2014

Pretty much terrified. I'm ignoring that part for now...

JulieSmiles · January 2014

Yea, I'm completely terrified. Every time I think about giving birth, I freak out a little and wonder what I got myself into.

austinlyns · January 2014

I'm not a FTM, but I was TERRIFIED of birth when I was! It seriously kept me up at night worrying about how painful it would be.

owlcup · January 2014

With my first I was really excited! Now with my third (and second) I am terrified. Im not looking forward to the pain or the recovery.

Nancy1250 · January 2014

I have no idea why, but I'm not scared. I just hope my body can do it and as efficiently (quickly) as possible.

Pepper6 · January 2014

I'm not looking forward to the actual birth, but since there's no way to avoid it, I just deal with it. I am more nervous about the recovery.

The only thing that really scares me is after the baby is here. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited and thrilled that I'll be a mom, but I think it's still one of the most terrifying things I'll ever do.

Kinipela7 · January 2014

I'm more afraid of the unknown, than the pain.

What will it feel like?

How long is it going to take?

Will I have to have a C-section?

What if I wait too long to go to the hospital and have the baby on the side of the road?

What if my water breaks while I'm sleeping and I don't notice and I have the baby in bed!?

dragonfly711 · January 2014

Yes, I am. I am worried about the epidural and if I tear, for some reason that is what I am worried about. I am not even worried about the contractions. Yeah I dont get it.

I have such a bad back and have had such bad pain I am surprised the contractions are not worrying me. lol

menebroekerj · January 2014

Watching "the business of being born" documentary made me less scared of a natural birth, very interesting movie. But I'm a FACS teacher, so I've seen all kinds of birth videos and teach about it. Now i get to live what I teach! Looking forward to the journey

kittenslove · January 2014

Terrified. I kinda live in this bubble 99% of the time were I just focus on the pregnancy and having my little one. Then 1% of the time I just want to hide under the covers and pretend this isn't happening.

ahastin1 · January 2014

Not really-but might completely change. I have a weird ability to block out pain. I know that this is not something I have ever been through and will be beyond intense, but I'll be able to see and envision an end which is always helpful. Idk, I keep focusing in my mom's birth story. Yes, she says it was hard but she always seems to go past that and directly to recovery (which she said was more difficult). I'm hoping to be the same way

almendarez · January 2014

Glad I am not the only one! I am completely terrified of the birth part.. it's almost like a sick joke that we have to squeeze a baby through our lady bits... Scared of the day(s) of pain, scared of something going wrong, scared of needing an episiotomy, scared to poop on the bed hehe...

ElTrain5 · January 2014

Kinipela7 said:
What if my water breaks while I'm sleeping and I don't notice and I have the baby in bed!?

This is SO going to be my new birth plan

k2k2tog · January 2014

I wanted to vote 'No way', but I don't think it's going to be a piece of cake, so I voted 'Not really' instead... But really, I kind of feel more like 'no way' because I know my body will be capable of it, and I'm fairly good at recognizing temporary pain and discomfort and suffering, pushing through it. And, if my body can't do it, there will be knowledgeable, capable people who will help it do it and get me through. So, I'm not scared of labour and delivery, but I expect it's probably going to be one of the hardest things I ever do in my life.

KarinaP29 · January 2014

Totally terrified! In denile at this stage of how this little one is coming into the world!

Lianneferrick · January 2014

I would definitely say I am moderately scared, I'm afraid of the pain but also afraid of getting an epidural so I am going to take some classes on hypnobirthing and trying to get as far as I can without getting the epidural. I'm sure my body can handle it and everything will be fine but I still worry sometimes.

Also afraid of pooping while pushing lol!

beasley1114 · January 2014

Yes and no. Not scared for me, just want to avoid a c-section and worried about having a healthy baby. Women in my family do not have healthy babies and deliveries so the horror stories scare me even though the situations are different compared to 25 years ago.

texasmama2014 · January 2014

Um yeah, it's like pushing a watermelon through a straw!!! Terrified!!

katekat8721 · January 2014

*nervous laugh* eh, yes.

Especially when I found out I'll be delivering in the operating room (twins). For some reason the thought of being in there surrounded by a ton of medical staff freaks me out.

FeliciaTwo · January 2014

Somehow I'm not scared yet. My mom keeps saying her births were not so bad. I also feel very curious and interested and excited. I know it's going to be intense and painful, but somehow that doesn't scare me so much. I know that the pain will be temporary, and that I can handle drawn out pain so long as I know it will end. We'll see how it actually goes . . .

JmeJoLee83 · January 2014

Another nervous Nelly here!

PinkKEL9 · January 2014

Yep, I am pretty much terrified. But I am just trying to stay positive about it and pray that everything will be alright in the end.

kgyorgy · January 2014

I'm more worried about dr's & nurses trying to push interventions to speed things up before they're actually necessary. I don't have a degree in medicine, but I also know that my body was designed to be able to do this on it's own. Might not fit the textbook definition of how long labor SHOULD last, but I don't want to be unnecessarily rushed, either. I'm scared as a FTM I'll be bullied into the labor the professionals want, instead of the labor my body knows is right for me & my baby.

MrsCase1 · January 2014

Well, I am going to be doing this for the second time and despite knowing what to expect, I still have anxiety. So, those feelings are normal!

MrsRage · January 2014

I'm SO scared! I try not to think about it. But when I had a mc last year it hurt so bad I had to go to the ER for pain. I asked the nurse if that is what giving birth feels like and she just laughed at me and said not even close. So yeah.. Pretty much terrified.

bumpuser9343355 · January 2014

I'm terrified, but I'm more scared of the recovery than I am the actual birth. I know I will get through the birth part (people do it every day, right?), but the horror stories I have heard/read about things like going to the bathroom after have me freaked the f out.

temursgirl · January 2014

Pepper6 said:

I'm not looking forward to the actual birth, but since there's no way to avoid it, I just deal with it. I am more nervous about the recovery. The only thing that really scares me is after the baby is here. Don't get me wrong, I'm excited and thrilled that I'll be a mom, but I think it's still one of the most terrifying things I'll ever do.

I feel this way. I'm not not scared of the birth, but I have a good doctor, I'll be in a good hospital, and DH is very level-headed, plus I can handle pain. I am scared of having a baby that is totally dependent on me and of doing the right thing.

skyview222 · January 2014

I am scared of having an emergency C-Section (cutting me open...), but not of vaginal birth.

I feel similar to @kgyorgy because I don't want to feel pushed into taking pitocin etc. I want to feel and be in control of my body's progression--something I plan to discuss with my doctor after I take the hospital birthing classes.

jaybee11 · January 2014

I'm going to echo what several PPs have said--I'm most concerned about the recovery. The thread from STMs about frozen pads and first bowel movements after baby are terrifying! Aside from that, I'm nervous of any sort of cutting on the lower half of my body. With twins, I'm mainly just praying that I can avoid a C-section, but if anyone comes toward my lady parts with a scalpel without a damn good reason, they might get kicked in the face. [-X

Pahialii · January 2014

I started watching episodes of "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant." Possibly not the smartest thing as now I picture myself giving birth in the toilet thinking I am constipated or something like that.

alicatand · January 2014

I'm not scared . . . yet. In fact, I'm sort of excited - I'm sure that makes me weird. It just feels like such a rite of passage. Though, once baby starts getting really big in there, I'm sure my confidence will waiver. I'm meeting with a doula and just hoping to be prepared, yet go into the birth with a wide open mind that birth "plans" almost never happen as planned.

margaritachikita · January 2014

Just wanted to say that a birth doula is a wonderful idea for any mom giving birth! It is someone who can give you support prenatally, help you formulate a birth plan, and then be with you as a knowledgable support person through your ENTIRE labor. I had a doula with my first, and achieved the unmedicated birth I had hoped and planned for. (Doulas are available for any birth, not just unmedicated births!) I then decided to become a doula and have attended 6 births in the last 6 months. Even so, I will still be hiring a doula for my next birth - they are indispensable!!!!
For more info, here is our local doula website: www.racinekenoshadoulas.com (go to the FAQ page)
You can find a local doula on www.doulamatch.net or www.doulas.com
Doulas have been scientifically proven to decrease cesarean rates, decrease pain of labor, decrease length of labor, decrease postpartum depression and recovery time, and increase baby's likelihood to successfully breastfeed and thrive up to two months after birth. Everyone deserves a doula! Especially FTMs! Please look into it, I promise you wont regret it

margaritachikita · January 2014

Also, taking an out of hospital birth class can make you feel much more prepared. Bradley or natural-focused classes offer much more information than your typical hospital course, even if you think you might want medication. These courses focus more on the body's natural processes and what a normal labor looks like without all the hospital interventions/timelines. Also, as a PP said, "The Business of Being Born" is a great documentary available on netflix. It really outlines the problems with America's maternity system.

b48kate · January 2014

My husband has a giant head. The children born in his family have all had what we lovingly refer to as "giant head syndrome". I'm scared to death!

margaritachikita · January 2014

skyview222 said:
I am scared of having an emergency C-Section (cutting me open...), but not of vaginal birth.

I feel similar to @kgyorgy because I don't want to feel pushed into taking pitocin etc. I want to feel and be in control of my body's progression--something I plan to discuss with my doctor after I take the hospital birthing classes.

Definitely talk to your doctor about your concerns. If he/she seems to brush you off, or mentions standard operating policies, they may not be the one for you. Also, a doula could help you avoid these things by advocating for your wishes in the labor room, even if you are unable to. A doula can also help you set up a birth plan so that the doctors and nurses are all on the same page with your choices regarding your birth.

Mztwilson · January 2014

This is my 4th and no way am I thinking piece of cake. I'm scared as shit. Just like the first second and third time!

abastian00 · January 2014

Swilkins1122 said:

I voted no way, but by no means do I think it will be a piece of cake! I don't feel scared though, just generally excited for everything I'm going to experience.

This. 100%. Though I may be eating my words in a few months

Lindsleigh77 · January 2014

I am not a FTM either but still scared. I remember the last time and the days afterward at home and yup totally scared but I also know in my heart that it is worth the pain of delivery and recovery and breast feeding lol

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