Why Can't People Mind Their Own Business?

BlckRoses · January 2014

I'm super annoyed at my friends at the moment.

I didn't want to tell anyone outside of immediate family about the pregnancy until after my 1st appointment on the 13th. So I've been fake drinking and making excuses at events. Well apparently I didn't do a good enough job. At our NYE party one of my friends pulled me aside (a little drunk) and told me that another friend of mine has been telling people that I'm pregnant. All because I didn't drink at 2 events. I'm super pissed about it. This rumor spreader didn't even talk to me about it and just started telling people. I didn't deny it but just told the friend that mentioned it to me that I would of course tell everyone if I was pregnant once I went to the doctor. But then she started making me feel guilty about it saying that if I was pregnant that means I've been lying to everyone, etc etc.

I'm pissed because it's my news to tell and now I feel like a shitty friend because I actually wanted to hear a heartbeat before I went around and told everyone. The rumor spreader is currently in Mexico on vacation, so I texted her asking her to stop telling people I'm pregnant. Nothing back from her yet. But now everyone is going to over analyze everything I drink for the next 2 weeks. Now I want to just avoid all social events until I'm ready to share the news. What a shitty new years for me.

Why are people so interested in my uterus?

seventhumbs · January 2014

What the fuck!! I agree with jessa, there is no reason for them to be making you feel guilty for "lying". Just another example of the way our bodies suddenly become up for public consumption when we get pregnant. If, for example, we weren't swimming because we had our periods, would it be OK for everyone to run around saying "She isn't swimming because she's ON HER PERIOD"?? No. But pregnancy's fair game, apparently.

MC03 · January 2014

Wow! I also got outed unwillingly this week and it really feels terrible. I am so sorry this happened to you too, and you @ScrappyLika. Why do people think they have a right to know what is going on with OUR bodies?!?! It is the most frustrating feeling. My first U/S and appointment is this morning, and I feel even more nervous and scared than I usually would because now everyone knows. Ughh. You are not a shitty friend because you were keeping it a secret, don't let these people make you feel bad about yourself. They are the ones with the problem!

BlckRoses · January 2014

Thanks, guys, for supporting my righteous indignation.

I did get a text back from her and she felt really bad, I just reminded her that people should get to decide when to share that news because of any number of things, including early losses, etc. Hopefully she'll think twice next time. I'm still avoiding everyone for the next 2 weeks.

tealowl · January 2014

I'm glad you confronted her and told her what she did was not appropriate. Hopefully she learns her lesson. I'm so passive it's hard for me to confront people, but this pregnancy is making me better at speaking my mind. Like when I put my friend in her place about her scolding me for eating sushi and wanting to go on vacation pregnant or with a baby.

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