DH as SAHD

musicalmama5 · January 2014

DH works at night, but is with DS during the day while I work at our business. Recently, I feel like he's really hit his stride as a SAHD. It's awesome. I'm sure it has to do with the fact that DS is no longer just a blob that needs my boob 24/7 and he can actually do fun stuff with him. But it's really cool to see this new side of him!

And I had a revelation recently about how this might be a better situation for us than if I were a SAHM. See, if I were at home all day, I would be obsessively cleaning/organizing/cooking/etc. But DH doesn't really care about all that stuff as much. So, sure, our house is not spotless and there are dirty dishes in the sink more often than not, but DH is pretty much always giving DS his full attention. More than I would be if I were a SAHM. It's hard to admit that, but it's true. And then when I am home with DS, I have missed him so I just say "screw it" to the mess and spend time with DS until he's asleep (then I worry about the mess!).

I'm just really proud of DH and wanted to brag a bit.

kleigh926 · January 2014

That's great! My DH has really been amazing with DD lately too. He's been home a lot since he quit his job so he's had plenty of time to spend with her, and it's so cool to see them interact together. He goes back to work on Monday and will be extremely busy with teaching and preparing lectures, so he won't have very much time with her soon. But it's been so cool to see what a great dad he is.

kelly321 · January 2014

I don't want to generalize too much, but it seems like a lot of men really hit their stride around the one-year mark when the LO starts becoming more active and social and you can *do* things with them. When I was pregnant with DD2, DH made the comment that he thought he would be able to handle the infant stage better this time around because he could see with DD1 that "it got better."

DH takes care of our girls 2x / week while I WAH, and he's also usually great with them. He gets stir-crazy at home, so he takes them to the hardware store, on walks to run errands, sometimes even grocery shopping. I'm more of a homebody and prefer not to take them on shopping errands, so we balance each other out pretty well since I take care of them most of the other 3 weekdays.

musicalmama5 · January 2014

uncaripswife said:

although I'm trying to discourage the growling because it tends to freak people out
My DH taught DD to laugh everytime she hears a burp. The one draw back of a sahd. [-X

LOL to both of those! My DH taught DS how to fake sneeze, which is pretty freakin' cute.

@kelly321 I know what you mean about the one year mark being the time when most dads hit their stride. It makes sense on many different levels.

We're lucky ladies to have such great baby daddies!

a13049 · January 2014

DH dream is to be a SAHD...he really wants me to pursue a principals position ASAP so he can quit his job and be a SAHD. He has some other money option on the side but we would be just fine on one salary as we live well below our current salaries anyways. I don't want to move into a principals position yet because it is a huge time commitment and I don't want to loose the extra time with DD.

Rynleigh · January 2014

I think if there weren't such a social stigma around it, there would be a pretty good chunk of dads who would love to stay home and do the day-to-day with the kids. If we could still afford it, DH would still do it. We just happen to need a two-parent income right now.

Puck1182 · January 2014

uncaripswife said:

NickysNutmeg said:
although I'm trying to discourage the growling because it tends to freak people out
My DH taught DD to laugh everytime she hears a burp. The one draw back of a sahd. [-X

That's awesome!

We have a picture book version of "Who's on First?" and DD laughs every time DH says "Third base!"

jesuisfatiguee · January 2014

uncaripswife said:

although I'm trying to discourage the growling because it tends to freak people out
My DH taught DD to laugh everytime she hears a burp. The one draw back of a sahd. [-X

My DS learned growling all on his own - no male influence at all. I think he was trying to clear phlegm one day and liked how it sounded. He growls all the time (especially when he sees a "grandpa" looking person???) and it's actually really cute!

ally2011 · January 2014

That is great! Fwiw though, I don't think babies need full attention 24/7. I stay home but have a couple volunteer roles plus house stuff so my dd has had to learn to entertain herself some. I have gotten lots of comments about how well she will play and "read" to herself (its hilarious) so this has helped alleviate mommy guilt of not focusing 24/7 on her.

musicalmama5 · January 2014

ally2011 said:

That is great! Fwiw though, I don't think babies need full attention 24/7. I stay home but have a couple volunteer roles plus house stuff so my dd has had to learn to entertain herself some. I have gotten lots of comments about how well she will play and "read" to herself (its hilarious) so this has helped alleviate mommy guilt of not focusing 24/7 on her.

Oh, he certainly doesn't get full attention 24/7 (DH still has to make meals for himself and clean up after himself, shower, and whatnot!). But he definitely does more fun stuff with DS than I would, I think. I can see myself turning into a cleaning/organizing freakazoid. I'm very type A and need to be DOING something all the time. So working suits me well.

ally2011 · January 2014

I am very type A too so I totally understand

Want a personalized experience?

DH as SAHD

Re: DH as SAHD

Choose Another Board

Search Boards