Babies: 0 - 3 Months

FF vs BF- help me reduce the stress

Let me start by saying I know everyone has their reasons for feeding their baby the way that they do. I think it's really crappy when people spout out the benefits of BF and how they think formula is the devil. It's because of this that I'm having anxiety.

So my question is ...

For those of you who choose to FF from the very beginning, what made you choose that option?

For those of you who started out BFing and switched to FF, what made you switch ?

For those of you doing both, how do you do it? Do you have to pump everytime you want to feed your baby BM? Or do you have confidence in your supply and yourself to nurse too?

My LO is 11 weeks old, and he has had nothing but BM ever. I'm really proud of this considering BFing is one of the hardest things I have ever done and I haven't had very many obstacles like I know many new moms have. The problem I'm facing is I'm back to work (have been back for 3 weeks now). I'm a doctor, I work 12 hour days and my schedule can get pretty crazy. I don't have time to pump all the time, but I do anyway, and my schedule suffers because then I'm behind. I'm off 3 to 4 days a week so I nurse him on those days.

The pump gives me so much stress I'm so sick of it. I love to nurse my little guy, but I HATE pumping with a passion. I don't always pump enough to feed him, then I worry about it and have to dip into my small freezer stash. I feel like I'm always trying to catch up. I hate it so much.

I really wanted to Bf until 6 months, but I'm so sick of pumping I don't think I can make it. I have no idea why, but I'm petrified to give him formula. What if he doesn't take to it? What if it makes him gassy or constipated. What if he doesn't get my antibodies anymore and gets sick? (We have a nanny that comes to our house, we don't have to worry about daycare). He is such a happy and healthy little guy I don't want to rock the boat. Plus I'm faced with the guilt that I didn't make it to 6 mo. Does that mean all of my hard work these past 11 weeks is wasted?

I just wanted to get feedback from those who do FF. I know nothing about formula or what it's like to formula feed. What formula is good, what regrets do you have if any. For those who do both, how do you do it? If I could, I would nurse him on my days off and just give formula when I work so I could ditch that lousy pump, but I know that would not work.

Re: FF vs BF- help me reduce the stress

  • If I do decide to add formula, should I do it sooner rather than later? For example on days I work I usually miss 5 feedings, and he eats 4oz a feed. I usually pump 18-20oz a day. If I pump the 20 oz I need, should I maybe freeze like 4 oz and supplement with formula? This would build my freezer stash back up so I could maybe offer BM for longer before switching completely over to formula? Or is that silly?
  • MWagner10MWagner10 member
    edited December 2013
    I have to EP due to tons of issues at the breast and my son physically not being able to properly nurse. My supply was very low and ii am working hard to bring it back up, in the meantime we give 2oz of breast milk and 1oz of formula in a bottle. It helps stretch my supply until I can give all breast milk. I don't think formula is the worst thing in the world and I feel better knowing that I am doing what I have to do to feed my baby. I agree that some breast milk is better than none so maybe having your nanny stretch your daytime bottles if you can't pump out enough is an option for you. I do find that my baby does much better if he has breast milk in all bottles. If he has a straight formula bottle he doesn't take it very well. Good luck!
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  • I would post a truncated version of thisnon the BF board and get input on schedule. I don't think you'll be able to stop pumping without it impacting supply your other days but I imagine you could cut back on pumping and nurse AM and PM. All your hard work is not wasted though. Any BM is preferable than none.

    I always suggest starting with a sensitive or gentle formula. I've noticed BF babies seem to tolerate those easiest.
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  • I'm a lawyer and my court schedule makes it difficult to always pump enough so we supplement with formula. Especially now that DD STTN and eats a lot more during the day. I make bottles each day with what I have and her nanny gives her formula if she finishes all of it. Most days she has one 3 oz bottle of formula.

    On my days off I try to nurse as much as possible but often end up giving her one bottle of formula especially if we are out and about or I want DH to feed her so I can spend time with my son.

    I do still pump everyday but it is so much less stressful now that I'm fine with her getting some formula. If I have an insane day I may only pump two times for 10 minutes each time. If I am on the phone all afternoon I sometimes pump for 30 minutes every two hours while I'm on calls. But I don't have to stress out about every ounce. I feel good giving her mostly BM and there is nothing wrong with using a little formula to preserve my sanity!
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  • I was reading on a sample can I have to add water and shake to combine. I thought I read somewhere that you shouldn't shake because it adds air. Should it be stirred instead?
  • I was reading on a sample can I have to add water and shake to combine. I thought I read somewhere that you shouldn't shake because it adds air. Should it be stirred instead?

    I do a quick gentle shake. Then swirl around a bit until some of the bubbles on top dissolve. I think you want to avoid feeding it to LO when it's very frothy because the air goes into their stomach that way.
    DS: 2/17/11          DD: 9/4/13
  • I breastfed my first son and my current newborn daughter for 2 days, that is all.  Neither of them took to the boob very well and I couldn't keep up with it.  So we started formula feeding right away.  They are happy and healthy and well-nourished and mommy is sane-- a win-win I say!  :)  It's just what worked for us for our own reasons and I am fine with that!  Just do what you think you need to do and don't beat yourself up either way!
  • My DD will be 7 weeks tomorrow. I started out EBF and pumping once a day to start building a stash for when I go back to work. I was only getting 1/2oz to an oz a pump, I knee I'd never have enough built up for when I went back to work.

    At DDs one month appt, I asked about introducing formula. He told me to go ahead and start her on it so she would be used to it when I returned to work. Since she had only had BM at that time, he suggested either enfamil gentlease or similac sensitive for low lactose. She took to the gentlease like a pro.

    At that time, I would give her an oz at the feeding I did right before putting her to bed at night. From the start, she was a much happier baby. I don't think I've ever produced enough milk to satisfy her. Since that time, I have started giving her an oz at every feeding after I BF, an 2 ozs after each feeding at night. She sleeps so much better.

    I know BM is better for her and all the benefits, but my biggest concern has always been to make sure she is well taken care of. If that comes from BM or formula, makes no difference to me. A happy, healthy baby is the most important thing.

    I do plan on trying to pump when I return to work next week, my goal is to give her BM as long as I can, but when there's no more, she will already be accustomed to formula.

    Good luck! The decision you make is yours and no ones opinion on here should make a difference in your decision.
  • I BF for the first 6 weeks. We then went through a lot of problems with my LO so we had to try lactose free formula. Throughout that time of trying differnt formulas I kept pumping incase she went back to BM.

    During that time I was so stressed, feeding and pumping so I didn't lose my supply. - it took most of my day up and I wasn't even working. I did this for about 2 weeks.

    When it seemed she was tolerating alimentum better than my BM I finally stopped pumping. I felt guilty for a few days but now I'm so less stressed, and I know that's better for my LO because I can concentrate on her.
  • LO fractured her clavicle during delivery and had some initial sucking issues so we had an awful time nursing. I pumped for nearly 4 weeks. Sometimes I could pump enough and sometimes I couldnt and had to supplement. Around that time my supply dropped and I was also put on medication for migraines, so we went to formula completely. DD has done fairly well with it and we use the Email Gentlease. I felt very guilty for a while and once I was off my medicine I debating relactating, but we have other ways of bonding now and DD is very healthy and happy on formula.
  • I was planning to BF exclusively, but my milk never came in so we obviously had to FF. I love the idea for BFing and all the benefits it has, but ultimately as long as DD is eating and healthy I'm happy.
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  • For those of you who choose to FF from the very beginning, what made you choose that option?
    I've never done this.

    For those of you who started out BFing and switched to FF, what made you switch ?
    I switched to formula for DD at 4 months because my suppy inexplicably tanked beyond recovery.

    For those of you doing both, how do you do it? Do you have to pump everytime you want to feed your baby BM? Or do you have confidence in your supply and yourself to nurse too?

    When my supply was going down in flames I nursed first. Then supplemented with formula after both breasts were fully drained. I did this until DD got so frustrated she refused the breast.

    I have no idea why, but I'm petrified to give him formula.

    What if he doesn't take to it? What if it makes him gassy or constipated. you usually find something that works for your baby.


    What if he doesn't get my antibodies anymore and gets sick? (We have a nanny that comes to our house, we don't have to worry about daycare). He is such a happy and healthy little guy I don't want to rock the boat. DD was mostly FF & had been rarely sick. DS is EBF & has been sick much more. It's an old wives tale that BF babies don't get sick as often. Sickness is about exposure, not how the baby is fed.

    Plus I'm faced with the guilt that I didn't make it to 6 mo. Does that mean all of my hard work these past 11 weeks is wasted?
    No. It was important to you so it's never a waste.

    Not to be a dick, but shouldn't a medical doctor know about formula? It seems weird to me that you are so lost about it. Every doctor I know at least knows a bit about feeding newborns. Even the men.

    We used Similac sensitive.

    No regrets. I fed my kid. How do you regret that?


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  • I'm an eye doctor. Baby formula knowledge is not required for my job. I could tell you anything you wanted to know about baby's eyes.
  • CJS2011CJS2011 member
    edited January 2014

    For those of you who choose to FF from the very beginning, what made you choose that option?
    I've never done this.

    For those of you who started out BFing and switched to FF, what made you switch ?
    I switched to formula for DD at 4 months because my suppy inexplicably tanked beyond recovery.

    For those of you doing both, how do you do it? Do you have to pump everytime you want to feed your baby BM? Or do you have confidence in your supply and yourself to nurse too?

    When my supply was going down in flames I nursed first. Then supplemented with formula after both breasts were fully drained. I did this until DD got so frustrated she refused the breast.

    I have no idea why, but I'm petrified to give him formula.

    What if he doesn't take to it? What if it makes him gassy or constipated. you usually find something that works for your baby.


    What if he doesn't get my antibodies anymore and gets sick? (We have a nanny that comes to our house, we don't have to worry about daycare). He is such a happy and healthy little guy I don't want to rock the boat. DD was mostly FF & had been rarely sick. DS is EBF & has been sick much more. It's an old wives tale that BF babies don't get sick as often. Sickness is about exposure, not how the baby is fed.

    Plus I'm faced with the guilt that I didn't make it to 6 mo. Does that mean all of my hard work these past 11 weeks is wasted?
    No. It was important to you so it's never a waste.

    Not to be a dick, but shouldn't a medical doctor know about formula? It seems weird to me that you are so lost about it. Every doctor I know at least knows a bit about feeding newborns. Even the men.

    We used Similac sensitive.

    No regrets. I fed my kid. How do you regret that?

    Not going to lie, my ped didn't even know much about formula. Like she said, there are so many different brands, so you just need to pick the one that works best for your baby. Her only suggestion was to choose a cows milk based one vs soy. Lay off the poor girl.
  • I'm pretty sure that the general theme across the boards is this: if you see a comment from primrosemomma it's probably going to be rude and you should just ignore it.

    But a bit more on topic. You are doing a wonderful job. Exclusively breastfeeding for 11 weeks is a wonderful accomplishment and your baby is going to benefit from it so much. As an exclusive pumper I totally understand your hatred for pumping, it really sucks! I do however think that your supply could very well suffer if you go an entire work day without pumping. Could you maybe squeeze in one half hour pump maybe over lunch (if you get an actual lunch break)? I think that even pumping once half way through your day would be a huge deal! :)

    As far as formula goes, I occasionally have to supplement because I'm still building my supply and lo eats more than I make some days. Remember this, not only is formula not the devil, it's actually good for babies. Breast milk is just better when you compare the two.

    No matter what you decide you can feel good about your decision because you are helping your baby grow big and strong!
  • Lurking..
    Dd was FF from 1/2 weeks and on. BF just never worked out and I never had that guilty feeling of FF her. In my mind, she was eating and healthy. We did have to switch formulas a couple times to find the right one for her, but it wasn't bad. Now she's 3 and has hardly ever been sick. Seeing her run around the playground with other kids, you can't tell who was FF and who was BF. Remember happy mom=happy baby.
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  • Sounds to me like you could try FF during the day and BF at night. There are tons of formulas out there, you will find one that works for your LO. My LO liked Enfamil when we were supplementing, but when I went to all formula we had to switch to Similac Sensitive (actually we use the generic version of it, LO is doing great on it). Get some samples from the 3 formula companies. Lots of moms who supplement use either Enfamil Gentlease, Similac Sensitive, or Gerber Gentle. And even though all formulas meet the same nutritional guidelines, they all have different ingredients and recipes of those ingredients so they are all different. GL!
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  • I am having a major supply issue and working on building it up.  I am a psychotherapist and don't always have time to pump either.  My baby girl had jaundice and therefore struggled with gaining weight at the beginning so our doctor told us to supplement.  It first started out she was taking an ounce after i breastfed her and now at 8 weeks, she is taking 3 oz after i breastfeed her.  I hate pumping, i get about a half oz when i pump, so not enough to do much, but i try. We had a sample of Enfamil newborn premium at our house, so when the doctor told us to supplement, we just started with that.  She drinks it like a champ and we have not switched to anything else. From what i understand Enfamil is favored more than others. Good luck to you.   

    Soooo, when will by baby's eyes change color?

  • That I can answer! They will be the color they will stay by 1 yr. they will keep changing up until that point.
  • I tried to bf... it was crazy painful and my baby would scream and turn purple. Went to formula- best decision for my family. Hubby got to have that bonding time as well.

    We went with nestle good start initially the one with DHA- made her terribly gassy. Switched to just the basic formula and it was perfect.... we also used Dr. Brown's formula pitcher to mix.... it was amazing!

    She is 3 now....tall, healthy and smart!
  • I had a breast reduction when I was a teenager, so I figured I would be unable to BF.  After my son was born the hospital really pushed to try to nurse him, I did, and they said that he was getting enough food.  However, after five days my son just screamed and screamed and screamed.  When we went to the pediatrician on day six she told us that my son was starving, lost over two pounds, and that we had to do something.  At that point, we started supplementing with formula.  For the first three months I diligently pumped, kept a record of how much milk I was producing, and watched that number fall.  In the beginning I could produce almost a third of his milk, but by the end of his first three months I was lucky if I got 15% a day.  I convinced myself that was such a nominal amount that it wasn't worth keeping the pump and continuing.

    He's now almost 7 months old, never been sick, and has met all his developmental milestones on time or a little early.  I felt guilty at first for not being able to give him more, but he's thriving, happy and healthy and in the end that's what counts the most.  
  • CJS2011 said:

    For those of you who choose to FF from the very beginning, what made you choose that option?
    I've never done this.

    For those of you who started out BFing and switched to FF, what made you switch ?
    I switched to formula for DD at 4 months because my suppy inexplicably tanked beyond recovery.

    For those of you doing both, how do you do it? Do you have to pump everytime you want to feed your baby BM? Or do you have confidence in your supply and yourself to nurse too?

    When my supply was going down in flames I nursed first. Then supplemented with formula after both breasts were fully drained. I did this until DD got so frustrated she refused the breast.

    I have no idea why, but I'm petrified to give him formula.

    What if he doesn't take to it? What if it makes him gassy or constipated. you usually find something that works for your baby.


    What if he doesn't get my antibodies anymore and gets sick? (We have a nanny that comes to our house, we don't have to worry about daycare). He is such a happy and healthy little guy I don't want to rock the boat. DD was mostly FF & had been rarely sick. DS is EBF & has been sick much more. It's an old wives tale that BF babies don't get sick as often. Sickness is about exposure, not how the baby is fed.

    Plus I'm faced with the guilt that I didn't make it to 6 mo. Does that mean all of my hard work these past 11 weeks is wasted?
    No. It was important to you so it's never a waste.

    Not to be a dick, but shouldn't a medical doctor know about formula? It seems weird to me that you are so lost about it. Every doctor I know at least knows a bit about feeding newborns. Even the men.

    We used Similac sensitive.

    No regrets. I fed my kid. How do you regret that?

    Not going to lie, my ped didn't even know much about formula. Like she said, there are so many different brands, so you just need to pick the one that works best for your baby. Her only suggestion was to choose a cows milk based one vs soy. Lay off the poor girl.
    Asking a question in addition to answering ALL of the requested information is not at all "laying into her". I feel that a medical doctor should know more than a lay person. Obviously this is not the case, but that's why I asked. If your pediatrician doesn't know about formula then I would get a new one!


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  • Primeosemama, you are missing her point. It's awesome that you answered ALL of her questions. What is not so awesome is your tone.
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