I'm a quitter.

tyedyeme12 · December 2013

After some serious anxiety over breast feeding (on the boob) and then anxiety over supply on the pump, and serious spit up every time J ate BM, I'm turning to exclusive FF.

I'm disappointed in myself, but I really think it's the best for me mentally (I'm already feeling a sense of relief as we have only FF today) and I'm hoping it will be best for Jude as well.

Anyway, though I'm not one who was on board with "formula is Pepsi", I still need just a little support in knowing I'm doing what's best for my family.

TXmamatobe · December 2013

Don't be disappointed, that shit is hard!! The best thing you can do is take care of yourself and make sure baby is eating and gaining appropriately - regardless of what that means. Hang in there!

KFiori1 · December 2013

Nothing wrong with that! With DS it stressed me out to nurse so I swithced to pumping and that stressed me out too so I quit pretty early on. No regrets. He's a happy, healthy, sweet almost 5 year old. With both DDs(so far) EP'ing has worked for me, but I truly believe you need to do what is best for you and baby. I personally don't think it's worth the stress!

n8swife · December 2013

You're feeding your baby. That's all that matters. You need to take care of yourself as well.

Buckeye608 · December 2013

What a tough decision, no one knows what lead to it but you. No judgment here. I hope your disappointment doesn't last long.

grannyweatherwax · December 2013

Don't be down on yourself, you're doing what is best for yourself & your baby. There's nothing wrong with formula feeding. I hope you find one that your baby likes & doesn't spit up

NurseKMM · December 2013

You are an amazing mom for recognizing the stress was effecting you. We use more formula than BM, (I make maybe enough for 1 feeding a day) and getting used to that fact was a hard pill for me to swallow. It is easy to feel pressure from society, that if you are not exclusively breastfeeding you are not providing the best for your child. I was exclusively formula fed. I'm now an RN and own my own house. And that formula was from the 80's, formula has only improved since then. I don't think being breast fed would have made any difference on the outcome of my life.

msiskind · December 2013

Because of both latch and supply issues, my son wasn't getting enough to eat when I was EBFing at the beginning. He wasn't gaining weight and I was so worried. BFing was a huge source of anxiety for me and I was miserable. I couldn't just enjoy being with my son because I kept dreading the next feeding.

Now after working with both our pediatrician and a very supportive LC, about 75% of his diet is formula and the rest is pumped breast milk. I'm taking supplements to try and increase supply so that maybe we can increase the amount of breast milk he gets and decrease the amount of formula.

Even though I still feel guilty about the formula, I know that not only is my son is getting the nutrition he needs, but I can be a better mother to him because I'm much happier than I was when EBFing.

We each have to make the decisions that are right for our families, even if it's not what our friends or relatives (or strangers) might choose under the same circumstances.

lemlemlem · December 2013

My son is almost exclusively FF and probably will be exclusively FF when I go back to work. I had major guilt when we started FF, but I don't produce enough milk. FF has helped me a ton. I no longer worry if my son is getting enough food from me. My DH and I are happier, and I am sure my son is too now that he gets a full belly of food.

Also, my brother, sister and I were all FF, healthy and successful. My son's pediatrician also said he was FF. My SIL also reminded me that there is not a question on college applications about if you were BF or FF as a baby.

frantastic12 · December 2013

You are doing what's best for you and your LO and that's all that matters. After my LO being inconsolable for the first 2 days home, we found out that I'm not producing nearly enough. I was gung-ho about BFing, but I'm producing less than half of what he needs. I'm pumping now, but not sure how long I'm going to. Probably not for the 6 months I planned to BF. He is a completely different baby from those first 2 days, and knowing that he is happy and healthy gives me reassurance that I'm making the best choice for us.

KateVA · December 2013

I don't see how you could be considered a quitter if you tried it. You gave bf a shot, it didn't work out, nbd. A happy mom is what a baby needs. Nothing else matters more than that

mamaj1220 · December 2013

How are you a quitter? You are doing what's best for your baby bc a stressed mommy makes a stressed baby. Also I'm with cash it's no ones business as long as your baby is eating! And I'm totally with you on the stress of non latching babies Kaleb and I just can't seem to figure it out so I pump and FF depending on supply but I too worry it might not be enough. Hang in there mama all that matters is a happy, healthy baby!

laurenmorris1 · December 2013

I'm with u. My LO is FF. After trying to get him to latch by using finger feeding and the a nipple shield - I didn't see an end in sight to getting him back at the boob. Around 9pm I would break down at The thought of waking up every hour and a half to take an hour and a half to feed him with all of these contraptions, My sanity was far gone! I am much happier now and although I wish I had been able to give maybe be more breastmilk we are able to get through our day happily!

tyedyeme12 · December 2013

I truly appreciate all these responses. I'm definitely taking a big sigh of relief. You all are so sweet and have made me feel a lot better about my decision. Not to mention, LO was just up for about an hour and a half or longer just hanging out and looking so much happier than the past couple days.

You all are super awesome.

serend · December 2013

Ditto x100 what others have said. You're doing what's best for you and baby. Absolutely no shame or judgement for that.

mightymousy · December 2013

*HUGS* absolutely do what you gotta do Hun! you're still doing a great job

readyornot12345 · December 2013

I am on the verge and understand. I don't make enough breast milk and my family makes me feel bad about it. Lo will also not latch without a shield and
even with one she's still hungry after feeding. I am pumping right now and doing half breast milk and half formula each feeding. The pumping is so hard to keep up though. Every 2-3 hrs is exhausting and feels like such a chore. I am pretty depressed these days and don't know why. Anyways,
I understand how you feel and you need to do what works for you and makes you happy. Hopefully I figure that out for myself soon too.

tyedyeme12 · December 2013

readyornot12345 said:
I am on the verge and understand. I don't make enough breast milk and my family makes me feel bad about it. Lo will also not latch without a shield and
even with one she's still hungry after feeding. I am pumping right now and doing half breast milk and half formula each feeding. The pumping is so hard to keep up though. Every 2-3 hrs is exhausting and feels like such a chore. I am pretty depressed these days and don't know why. Anyways,
I understand how you feel and you need to do what works for you and makes you happy. Hopefully I figure that out for myself soon too.

I really hope you can figure out what will be the best for you and your family. Part of my decision was that pumping. I always felt like I had to worry about when to feed LO and then when to pump. It's exhausting.

pink flamingo · December 2013

I'm made the decision today to FF. I have tried to increase my supply for more than two weeks now using mothers milk tea, fenugreek and eating certain foods and it barely made a dent. I was so tired of breastfeeding then bottle feeding then pumping every two to three hours . It was horrible I practically couldn't do anything because that whole process to about 1 1/2 -2 hrs almost. I even tried ti go strictly back to breast feeding but even her feeding 20 minutes on each boob she still ate 3 oz formula right after ! The cried for almost two weeks but finally came to terms with it today. I'm sure it will get better every day but it's hard. Like everyone says though it's what's best for your LO and your own sanity. We should make a support group for moms in transition from BF to FF.

MissyC979 · December 2013

I'm with you. I stopped pumping three days ago. I pumped for five months with DS1, but I knew I couldn't do that again, especially after my supply tanked this time. I'm still coming to terms with it, but I'm on my way to being okay with FFing this time. Good luck to you too.

cyndi1439 · January 2014

I'm a quitter too. I had no option other than pumping since my 27 weeker couldn't breastfeed in the beginning. I pumped RELIGIOUSLY for 8 weeks but I wasn't producing enough to feed her. If she was being fed 10 ml, I might make 3 out of both boobs. I met with the NICU lactation department every week for 8 weeks, took every supplement they suggested, ate oatmeal and flax, lactation cookies, etc. The stress of pumping with little results was making the problem worse. I felt a million times better once I allowed myself to stop. My baby is thriving and I've managed to keep a portion of my sanity!

Aycul18 · January 2014

No judgement here. I'm in your boat... I couldn't bf after day 2 because her latch was so bad that my nipples were bleeding almost immediately... Then I decided to pump and I was pumping maybe 2-3 ounces a day and was thinking it would go up, but it's gone down... This morning I got less than 1/2 ounce and haven't had time to pump again since my little princess didn't want to be put down all day... I think I'm going to stop too.

Sorry, didn't mean to thread Jack (if that's what I did), just wanted to say, you're not alone.

tyedyeme12 · January 2014

Aycul18 said:
No judgement here. I'm in your boat... I couldn't bf after day 2 because her latch was so bad that my nipples were bleeding almost immediately... Then I decided to pump and I was pumping maybe 2-3 ounces a day and was thinking it would go up, but it's gone down... This morning I got less than 1/2 ounce and haven't had time to pump again since my little princess didn't want to be put down all day... I think I'm going to stop too.

Sorry, didn't mean to thread Jack (if that's what I did), just wanted to say, you're not alone.

Nope, not a thread jack

I think as @pinkflamingo suggested, this can turn into a transition support station, or I will start a new thread. I think I'll start a new thread.

I'm a quitter.

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