April 2013 Moms
jss1482
member
tell me it will be O-K
jss1482
member
I am going to sleep train Paige. After never once STTN - and now she wont go back in her crib after she wakes up in the middle of the night and I made the mistake of bringing her to bed with us. its time.
I know she is OK, as soon as I pick her up she is fine and nuzzled, but since the whole crawling, learning to sit her self up- she just wont go back to bed.
I still rock her to sleep every single night and as much as I love it, I understand that's where I went wrong in the first place but I am will to give the ole Ferber or a basis of Ferber a try.
I am just terrified of letting her get SO worked up. I am afraid she will throw up or pass out. I know that letting them cry is OK but just need to hear it for the 23493029309 time.
Sure wish they had like baby sleep training boarding school so us mom's didn't have to go thru it ( kidding of course)!
Also, anyone who has done, I am thinking about just going cold turkey. a LOT of times she gets more and more upset if I go in to check on her... would it just be completely awful if I just let her cry it out without checking on her?
Some encouraging words would do wonders... or a 'don't do it you will be a terrible mom' might need to be said too.
UGH
I know she is OK, as soon as I pick her up she is fine and nuzzled, but since the whole crawling, learning to sit her self up- she just wont go back to bed.
I still rock her to sleep every single night and as much as I love it, I understand that's where I went wrong in the first place but I am will to give the ole Ferber or a basis of Ferber a try.
I am just terrified of letting her get SO worked up. I am afraid she will throw up or pass out. I know that letting them cry is OK but just need to hear it for the 23493029309 time.
Sure wish they had like baby sleep training boarding school so us mom's didn't have to go thru it ( kidding of course)!
Also, anyone who has done, I am thinking about just going cold turkey. a LOT of times she gets more and more upset if I go in to check on her... would it just be completely awful if I just let her cry it out without checking on her?
Some encouraging words would do wonders... or a 'don't do it you will be a terrible mom' might need to be said too.
UGH
This discussion has been closed.
Re: tell me it will be O-K
Not physically checking in is cry it out to extinction. Basically means you sit and cry while watching/listening to the monitor until baby stops crying. For a lot of babies that is more effective and efficient than checking in because baby gets too worked up each time you go in to check on her.
Trust yourself that you are making the best decision for your family, whatever that ends up being. You got this, mama!
You are not a terrible mom to sleep train your baby. She will be fine. If you know she isn't hungry, has a relatively clean diaper, isn't in pain, and is safe, then there is no reason to run in and rescue her. I know there are many techniques to sleep training. I don't profess to know them at all. With my kids, I usually let them scream for 5-10 minutes and they usually stop on their own within that period of time. I have to literally watch the clock because screaming babies for 5 minutes feels like an hour!
It will definitely be okay, but it will be hard in the short-term. Good luck!
TTC since May 2006. After 3 failed Clomid cycles, 2 failed Injectibles/IUIs, 2 failed IVFs and 1 failed FET, we moved on to adoption!
Last ditch FET resulted in BFP, and identical twin girls!
H and I sleep trained the girls (9 months) over the holiday and we all survived. Being in the trenches together was key! Whenever one of us would falter or hold one of the girls a little too long (cheating the system basically), the other was there to remind and stay the course.
We chose to go with Baby Whisperer "Pick up, put down", which takes more time, but it's working well so far. I, like you, was terrified of letting them get too worked up, so we decided to try a no-cry (i.e. less-cry) alternative first. If this method didn't work, Ferber was next.
If you and SO are on the same page and ready to support each other, you'll be good! As PP said, teaching your child effective sleep habits makes you a GOOD mom!
You totally got this and everyone's here for you!
p.s. (and a little wine REALLY helped, in my opinion)
any other advice, keep it coming!
@poohblair- to go thru it, with TWO babies, mercy me and yes, the wine has to help!
- question, on the technique you used, Paige likes to sit up as soon as I put her down, did your girls do that? I would like to try your method first to see if it would work, did you pick up and put down right after another or did you wait in intervals before doing so?
But seriously - it's been one of the best things we've done as parents so far. She puts herself to sleep so easily now. Good luck!!
did you do ferber? with the intervals or just full on extinction?
Thanks for the encouragement
As to the other part of your question, we would wait and stay in the room a few moments to see if they would settle themselves back down. If they started to rev up; however, we'd pick them up almost as soon as we laid them down. It was a little bit of trial and error to see what worked best for each baby. HTH!
time to bite the bullet! Fingers crossed!
one more question, what do you do in regards to MOTN feedings? I still feed Paige at least once a night ( which i also think is habit but don't know if we can cut out all at once) - maybe just pick a time and that is her feed time and all other times work on the self soothing?
She is slowly getting better.....
I nurse/rock to sleep... after about 10 minutes I slowly put her in the crib (on her stomach). For the first little while for each waking I would nurse her to sleep and repeat. Once she got used to being in the crib, I worked on rocking her to sleep (vs nursing) if it had been less than 4 hours. Then, finally I got to the point where if she woke up after the transfer I would let her CIO... I have a personal limit because I cannot let her cry alone for very long but luckily for me she has never cried longer than around 20 minutes... her longest time was 23 minutes.
The first night was the hardest for sure.. I watched her on the video monitor (which really helps because you can see she is okay). I watched her in the monitor and cried.... to my surprise by 18 minutes she was starting to fall asleep and she was out by 20 minutes. Then, I balled even more because my baby cried herself to sleep. But I was so happy it only took 20 minutes, my little lady is stubborn and I was sure I would be hearing her cry for hours. And after that night any time I have let her CIO at night she is always out by the 20 min mark.
You can tell if they are going to go to sleep because after awhile they get into a sleeping position and take longer breaks in between crying.
This only works for us at bed time.... Naps are still a mystery to me She does not transition easy into the crib during the day.. I have let her cry up to 25 minutes for nap and some days she is asleep by 20 min and other days I am getting her at the 25 minute mark feeling like an A hole.
But I do think that working on it the way I did has really helped and I did it in a way I felt comfortable with. And actually this week DH has rocked her back to sleep if she wakes up before 4 hours (which has NEVER happened... until now she would scream bloody murder, worse than if you left her in the crib if anyone got her out but me).
I don't know if you feel comfortable with it but putting her in on her stomach has made a big difference as well. Good luck
Thank you all very very much for the support, I will keep yall posted!