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Anyone choosing not to ask for child support?

SimpleComplexitySimpleComplexity member
in Single Parents
I have come to find out that LO's dad is seriously cash strapped and paying CS on 2 other children. I could swing it (financially) alone, but it will take some rearranging and sacrificing. Since his home and his habits are incredibly unsafe I am WHOLEY willing to do it without him so if that means I don't have to fight him for custody or visitation. Anyone else decide to skip the CS to avoid the headache?
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Re: Anyone choosing not to ask for child support?

  • Gamera3000Gamera3000 member
    I'm hoping the thought of CS will help my BD leave us alone, at least while he's still living in a van and doing hard drugs.
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  • 20thirteen20thirteen member
    I chose not to, I also chose not to have BD on the birth certificate. This way, he can't take me to court on an emergency motion to take DD away from me (not that he would).  He'd have to prove he was the father first.

    Anyway, BD works under the table at a hydroponics store ("grow shop" as he calls it) so he doesn't have a job on paper. He gets paid out of the register or in pot to sell (if his boss doesn't think there is enough cash in the register).  So, filing for CS wouldn't give me anything other than a migraine and visitation rights for him (because then *I'd* have to prove he's the father).  I don't want him around anyway.  Because of the situation with his mother (I chose to allow his parents to be a part of DD's life), I do have to see him occasionally.  There is nothing more annoying than his god damn parents.
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  • 20thirteen20thirteen member
    Oh, last I heard he was also living out of his car.  He doesn't have a bank account either, and if he did, creditors would freeze it because he's about $35K in debt.

    Boy, did I choose a winner or what?  Who's BD was talking about single mom's wanting fame and being gold diggers?  Because, clearly, I chose the wrong guy... LOL
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  • jdias428jdias428 member
    I'm not asking for $. BD is aware of this but insists he wants to provide financial support and have the kid in his life. I'm taking this with a grain of salt since 2 months ago he was begging me to abort and left me bc I would'nt. I'm also leaving him off birth certificate (have to, as he won't be present). So he'd have to jump through some hoops anyway to get custody, etc.  He's been unwilling to speak to me, although I've tried several times to have us talk about what his role would actually be. 
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  • tig594tig594 member
    Hell no.  The sperm donor begged me to get pregnant and by golly I'm going to squeeze every penny possible from his ass for the next 18 years.  Granted, being that he's currently sitting in jail doesn't help.  It's the principle of the matter.   I am 99.9% sure he'll never get anything but supervised visitation that he probably won't even use. That money is DD's and she deserves to have it.  

    Think of it this way.  Even if your LO's father only has to pay $30 a month til the age of 18...that's $6480.  Put that in an account for school, a down payment on a car or house, or a nice family vacation for you and LO.  Senior trip, sports gear, etc etc.  
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