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How to go from cosleeping to sleeping alone

MelissaV10MelissaV10 member
in Attachment Parenting
First off Hello! DD is our first and is 15 months old, she has always slept in our bed as we discovered early on that she would not sleep any other way. FF to now and I am currently pregnant again with DD #2! I'm almost 7 months along and would really like to move our 15mo into her own bed. Here's the problem, she will not sleep. She insists on being nursed to sleep and once asleep will almost immediately wake as soon as I move away from her. She will scream for hours... Even being touched and soothed. Is she simply telling me she isn't ready for this? I just don't know how to handle it with a new baby coming in a couple months.
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Re: How to go from cosleeping to sleeping alone

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    MelissaV10MelissaV10 member
    Oh and one other fact. DH works on ships and is gone 4-5 months at a time, and is not currently at home.
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    pixieprincsspixieprincss member

    Is cosleeping not working for you or is it because of some outside feeling/fear that she should sleep alone at this age/you should help her grow up/baby is coming, etc.? My boys are 19 months apart and I decided to not "solve" something until it was actually a problem. Since it didn't become a problem to cosleep with two, we actually really benefitted. DS1 really needed to remain a baby and get loads of cuddles despite having a new baby in the family. Nighttime allowed us to reconnect. I slept with one kid on each side, facing DS2 to nurse and have that protective cuddle-curl around him. I had planned on tandem nursing, but DS1 weaned when I was 37 weeks PG and my milk turned to colostrum. If things are actually at a problem state, yes--fix them. But, if they aren't a problem, I say put your energy into the things that NOW needs. Let those other things work themselves out when the time is genuinely needed.

    (Writing from in the middle of a sleeping 35 month old and 16 month old, which doesn't happen as much these days. )

    :D

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    MelissaV10MelissaV10 member
    I guess most of the problem stems from the fact DH is away so much it's nice to have just us time in our bed when he is home. We manage it with one okay but with two, not sure how that's going to work. Maybe I'm totally over thinking this? Obviously we are fairly new at all this!
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    rae_dylanzmomrae_dylanzmom member
    Funny, my DH is out of town, and I tried to have a slumber party in my bed last night with DS. He ate popcorn and played with his buddies, watched Nemo (I fell asleep),.... and then said he wanted to go back to his own bed to sleep. I was actually a little disappointed.

    Looking back at the transition, we probably spent a year getting him from our bed to his. We used a floor mattress next to our bed as an interim step, where I could sleep with him. I also skipped a crib and toddler bed, and stuck with options that would be comfortable for me to sleep with him.

    At 15 months, he had a twin bed in his room that he was getting used to and started using for naps, and he had a mattress on the floor next to our bed that he/we slept on at night. I could hop up into our bed when I wanted, and then respond to DS without a lot of waking on my part.

    I forget where these ideas came from, and it's difficult to summarize a year-long transition, but the NCSS gave me some good ideas.
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    Emerald27Emerald27 member
    DS' bed is a twin mattress on the floor right next to my side of the bed. I put him to bed there, go to sleep in my own bed, and if/when he wakes, I move down to his bed and nurse him there, sometimes falling back asleep with him. His sheets are so cool, and he loves his train pillow and blanket. He knows I'm right there and is quite content.

    We started the transition with me just sleeping with him all night in his new bed just like we had always done. Then I started slipping away once he was asleep, and going back to him if he wakes. Nowadays, he only wakes during the night occasionally, and on days he sleeps through, I move down to him in the early morning for extra snuggles before he wakes.
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