Gym Childcare and Mom Guilt

spainy17 · December 2013

Has anyone used the child care room at the gym yet? I went and toured ours this past week and asked my neurotic first-time mom questions and I am still feeling HORRIBLY guilty about bringing her there and I haven't even done it yet! DD was and still is really slow to warm to people and it took her quite a long time to adjust to even the tiny in-home daycare we use and she has never been watched by anyone other than the daycare provider (one lady) and family. I am having huge guilt issues knowing that she is going to be frightened just so I can go to the gym.

In addition I have regular mom-guilt over the fact that I work full time so she is already in daycare often and starting in January I want to start going to the gym 3 days a week. I can logically tell myself that people do this all of the time but I feel just sick about it. Anyone using the gym child care yet and have good experiences or advice? I would really like to get back to feeling like a fit person again and miss the gym but am so nervous...

spainy17 · December 2013

THIRD mom guilt part... we are just trying to survive the no-sleep-hell that comes with teething and I am also afriad she will get sick all of the time when I go there! I mean, I am all for building immunity but if she gets sick then I am down for the count too since there will be even less sleep and then the workouts were for nothing. So many worries, being a new mom is hard!

jobiann · December 2013

I found myself not doing things just because of what I thought was "best" for DS. My H had to sit me down and have a talk that sometimes things are not ideal but DS will be just fine. We as parents have to have our own time too, it's important to maintain a healthy mental attitude and to have a healthy relationship with our spouses.

So after much worry of leaving DS with a sitter for one date night a week, or staying up past DS's usual bed time on occasion, we finally started living a little. And guess what, here we are three months later and DS is happy and healthy and my H and I are happier as a couple too! For the most part we are home evenings and DS can go to bed around 6:30 or 7:30pm and we go to bed around 10pm. But now we are comfortable for one date night a week which has worked wonders for our marriage and a few late nights (8 or 9pm) out with DS and all is well!

As far as gym specific d/c's, ours does not have one so we leave him with my Mom or the sitter. But if your d/c sees a real problem they will surely come and get you. Give it a chance, maybe your LO will like it. Just like regular d/c there is a warming up period. GL!

Allycat11 · December 2013

We have been leaving DD at the nursery at the Y since she was 3 months old. She hates other people so she screams a lot when she is there but if I don't keep leaving her with other people, she will not learn that it is okay. I actually think it is worse for everyone if I keep her with me 24/7.

Hollylb3 · December 2013

I was terrified of using ours because I've never left DS with anyone that isn't family and he's pretty leery of strangers holding him. I figured he'd melt down and he'd have a lot of adjusting to do. I finally took him a few weeks ago and he didn't even shed a tear. He was pretty distracted by my absence due to the tv, which he doesn't get to watch at home, lol. Also, there were a couple other kids he was fascinated with. He's been going for several weeks now and hasn't cried once. Just do it! It's like a bandaid, you just have to rip it off.

aklawrence1 · December 2013

I've been having this debate with myself as well. I desperately want to get back to the gym but I hate the idea of their childcare in addition to regular daycare while I work 50 hrs/wk. But reading these responses really helped me too. GL mama, I completely understand where you're coming from. But we cent be everybody's everything without taking care of ourselves too.

chance_encounters · December 2013

I go to the gym. I put him in the daycare. He now has little friends there and he is a very shy/stand-offish little boy. I promise your LO will be ok and you will be happier and healthier for going.

spainy17 · December 2013

Thanks guys the responses really helped me. My goal is to make 2014 the year for me. I gave her 100 percent of myself this past year and I want to try and work towards getting myself back to feeling human again next year.

Mom guilt is brutal and like one of the pp's said I often find myself holding back on things because I worry about what is best for her and I really want to try and find a better balance this year. I will report back after the start of the year if I can get the balls to drop her off.

Chappy_jr · December 2013

That's my goal, too, spainy17. I have been leaving DS with DH in order to go to the gym but it cuts into time with DH and pushes our dinner quite late so I am going to start using the daycare too. I know it might be rough the first few times but he'll get used to it and ours is really nice with LOT of room for him to roam around and toys to play with. We just have to do it.

spainy17 · December 2013

I know!!! That is my issue with leaving her with DH too (not to mention that he would whine about it). I just want to bite the bullet because i know once we get used to it it will be so convenient. I am posting it on here so it makes me follow through because it is part of my resolution to focus on my own heath/fitness this coming year.

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