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vent: I give in

Junemom2013Junemom2013 member
in June 2013 Moms
A few weeks ago I posted about my MIL drama and christmas. We asked that no one bring the dogs on xmas eve and day since my house is not that big and my dh family are not small people. we are going to have 9 people plus my lo in the house at the same time. The dog is a energetic golden retiever who they have no control over. and I've tried to explain to them that i dont want to worry that my lo w(ho cant crawl and spends her playtime on the floor) getting stepped on by a big dog. for the past month my mil and her friend have been causing drama, the friend wont come with out the dog and my mil wont come without the friend.  

They think a good compromise is for them to bring the dog and just leave her in the car while they are here. I don't think thats fair to the dog to be left in a cold car for 4-5  hours but, it was either that or they dont come.  so yesterday I gave in. I told my sil she can tell her mother that the dog can come in the house since its obviously more important that she be with the dog and friend over her children and grandchild. i told them the dog needs to be leashed and with them the entire time i do not want the dog roaming my house and i will just not allow my daughter to be on the floor while they are here. 

My dh says he is done with the drama and his entire life has been spent not upsetting the friend and he's tired of being second. I feel so bad. i would be devastated if my mother chose a friend over me or my siblings. 

I think i am going to be drinking the entire time they are here.  I am already counting down to when they leave. 
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Re: vent: I give in

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  • musicalsilvermusicalsilver member
    Your MIL is definitely being unreasonable about this.  As the owner of two big dogs - I know how nerve-wracking it can be with LO on the floor (which is why LO spends a lot of his time on the couch etc) - so I can totally empathize with your situation.

    Keeping the dog leashed at all times seems like a better deal (I can't imagine if she loves this dog so much that she'd willingly leave it in the cold in the car!!??!).  I wish you happy drinking, and hope the drama doesn't get to be too much!
    BabyFetus Ticker
    DS born 6/2013
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  • Junemom2013Junemom2013 member
    @maelara i dont think your being mean at all. I actually agree with you.  

    My family is not like this at all, so its hard for me to understand this. whats funny is my mil has been bugging me for years about grandkids and now that  my lo is here she never calls and asks about her. she may jump on my moms fb comments asking for pictures but thats it.  

    I also think if i didn't bring up the "leave your dog at home" convo she would have just shown up with the dog anyway. she never even asked if she could bring the dog. 

    my house is dog friendly I had a dog for 15 years (she passed just before xmas last year) and I know it sounds hypocritical but we are going to have my sister dog in the house. but the only reason this dog is being allowed is because he's literally dying. We found out in november he is in heart failure and the vet only thinks he will have (at most) 6 months left. she is coming for xmas eve and day and lives an hour away. he is going to be in my bedroom while everyone is here. He doesn't get along with other dogs, they stress him out...so i didn't want to have another dog in the house to stress out a dog who already has a bad heart! i talked to my sister about it and she thinks it will be ok as long as the dog doesn't see my mil dog.  

    My mil is only coming for xmas day...driving 5 hours here staying for a few hours and driving 5 hours back. 


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  • MaelaraMaelara member
    Your MIL sounds like a piece of work. I'm with @winesconstantly, is there a separate room you can put the other dog? Away from the dying dog.
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  • peachnectarinepeachnectarine member
    She sounds crazy. Why will she not come without the friend? Did she just tell you the friend was coming too or did you invite her? At least she lives 5 hours away!
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  • Junemom2013Junemom2013 member
    The friend lives with his mother. They have lived together for a long time and are very dependent on each other...to dependent on each other really. I really don't have any issues with the friend and have gotten along with her in the past.

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  • JANCANDANCEJANCANDANCE member
    Hell no. You are much nicer than me. We sure as hell wouldn't be seeing the MIL, the "friend" or that damn dog. Good luck.
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  • HeartLikeMine3HeartLikeMine3 member
    JANCANDANCE said:

    Hell no. You are much nicer than me. We sure as hell wouldn't be seeing the MIL, the "friend" or that damn dog. Good luck.

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  • Nix55Nix55 member
    WTF? Is this for real? I'm sorry. That's all I've got.
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