Hard time processing, death of a former student.

tbmadeamistake · December 2013

I found out last night that a former student of mine passed away on Friday. She was 17. I cannot imagine what her parents must be feeling, but I pulled C out of her crib last for extra late night snuggles, once I stopped crying. Every time I think of that school, she is always one of the students who pops into my head. The saddest part is that based on her history, it was most likely either suicide or thoughtlessness.

I am having such a hard with this, I barely slept last night. I'm going to the services tomorrow because as a parent, I would want to see the people who had fond memories of my child. I would want to know who thought of her.

I guess I just needed a place to vent. DH cleaned me up last and is dealing with C this morning for me. I might call my mother.

colllydon · December 2013

I am so sorry to hear that! T & P for you and her family!

erind228 · December 2013

It's so hard to fathom losing a student. I had a student commit suicide a few years ago. I actually had him at the time, and remember coming across a quiz of his after he passed.
It is so hard. I will be thinking of
you and her parents during this difficult time.

dragonfly711 · December 2013

I am so sorry. I am a teacher so I so understand what you are going through.

In the past 3 months I have lost an ex coworker and a cousin to suicide. It is so hard to comprehend.

Does your job have any people you can talk too? Usually with something tragic like that they will have someone for staff and students to go to. Maybe that might help you.

If not maybe talk to you Dr. It can be a very hard thing to comprehend so if you are ok with getting some help. Even just someone to talk to it might help you.

Thinking of you as well as her family in this tough time.

tbmadeamistake · December 2013

I no longer work for the school, or any school. O have dealt with situational depression in the past so I am lucky and have a great support group. I will definitely call my doc if I need to. DH is also good at cluimg me in when I don't see it. Thanks!

ahastin1 · December 2013

The school psychologist should be around for you. Speaking from experience, honestly it's ridiculously hard for him/her too (whether we knew the student directly or not it's so difficult to fathom a young person passing...one who walked tot hallway and who maybe was discusses in your meetings with teachers), but can be helpful. Also, schools often (or should) have a crisis team set up and in place and available to you for help. If you are going to a memorial for the student held by the school, they will often be there. Talk with them and they will follow up with you as much as is necessary.

I'm sorry about your shocking loss. I know it's incredibly tough when one of our young ones passes. Snuggle your little one as much as possible-that's the perfect treatment.

ElTrain5 · December 2013

I'm so sorry for your loss. Make sure you take the time you need to process.

skyview222 · December 2013

I'm so sorry. As an educator, I can imagine the grief. In 12 years, I have yet to lose a student and fear the day I will. I have had a student run away and another get in a serious car wreck and that was hard enough.

Virtual hugs and support are yours for the taking.

Raquel6714 · December 2013

I'm so sorry to hear this. As a high school teacher, it's one of my worst nightmares. I have dealt with the loss of current and former students -neither situation is easier to deal with than the other.
I just found out that at my last district (I switched schools this past fall) 5 students were involved in a car accident. Everyone survived, but walked away with broken bones, cuts and bruises. Although I'm not their teacher anymore, it still affected me to hear this.
Your "kids" become your own and it's just instinct to keep them safe and protected esp at such a vulnerable age. It's so nice that you've decided to go to the services as I believe it will help your grieving process as well as support her parents. I hope you find peace this holiday season.

SchoolPsychSteph · December 2013

How terrible and I can't imagine what those parents are dealing with. In a time like this, there are no words. I probably would want to go to the funeral and service if it were one of my former students. I'm dreading the day I have to face this kind of situation in my career, but hope and pray I won't have to. Just terrible.. ((hugs))

MrsCase1 · December 2013

Tragic. Very sorry.

kibean · December 2013

I am so sorry for your loss. It is always hard to lose someone young and sadly it seems like it happens too often. I am a school psychologist and I know I would welcome anyone teacher, student or former staff member, who needs to talk. Last year I lost one of my students that I worked closely with. He was murdered during gang violence. I wanted so badly to go to the services (many of his former teachers went). I wasn't able to go because of a crisis in my other school and I have always regretted that. I hope you can get some closure and I am glad that you will be able to show your support to her family. T&Ps!

tbmadeamistake · December 2013

Thank you all, so much, for your support! Even this helps a ton. I went to the services this morning and it was profound how many people turned out for it. They postponed the start by 45 minutes because people just kept coming. Hundreds. I sat with the teachers from the school and even though I've been gone two years, I was welcomed back with open arms for this. I will be calling my work's counseling hotline to get some added support, and hopefully that will help.

Thank you.

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Hard time processing, death of a former student.

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Re: Hard time processing, death of a former student.

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

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