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Filed for CS

babymama619babymama619 member
in Single Parents
I knew I would file the moment BD said he "needed DNA before he got involved"...and after I figured out he lied about his vasectomy. the funny thing is she looks so much like his other daughter DNA is almost a joke.

But for some reason it seems like a huge step to have actually filled out the form with his name, my name and DDs name and then pop it in the mail. I'm a little nervous about what will happen once he gets the notice in the mail mostly because the whole situation is so awful for lots of other people. (Namely his wife and infant daughter who I knew nothing about. I also can't imagine it will go over well with his ex-wife and their kids or his family who he seems to be close with). It sort of makes me sick to my stomach. But he did this to himself and I'm doing what's best for DD.

I just hate that my daughter has siblings that live 10 minutes away and whom she might never know. I hate that he made me a home wrecker without my consent. I hate that even if him and his family do become involved in her life I'll probably always be viewed as that home wrecker cheating other woman.

Sigh. Thanks for reading.

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Re: Filed for CS

  • 20thirteen20thirteen member
    :/ You shouldn't really feel like a home-wrecker if you didn't know he was lying about being single.  My BD told that girl he left me for that he was single and when she found out he wasn't, she still pursued him and then stalked me to brag about their sex life.  THAT is a home-wrecker, a bitch (or an asshole, home-wreckers aren't gender specific) who doesn't care about the fact that the BOY she's going after (or girl he's going after) has a family at home (or in my case, that he had a pregnant girlfriend). You didn't know. So, it isn't your fault.  One of my previous ex's was a lying cheater and, eventually, me and the other girl became pretty good friends (obviously, this was after we both found out what a douchebag he was). 
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  • babymama619babymama619 member
    edited December 2013
    Yeah, thanks. I don't actually feel like a hone wrecker I just think I'll be viewed that way and that sucks, even though he's the one who wrecked his home. Dipshit. I also do feel bad for the poor wife who probably has no idea this is coming. Although, after some Internet sleuthing I found he was Internet dating, so maybe she will se it coming.

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  • 20thirteen20thirteen member
    Wow... Just, wow... That guy... Just wow...
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  • momof2buggsmomof2buggs member
    You're not a home wrecker. He is. 


    Good for you for defending your daughters' right to receive support from both parents! A lot of women complain because bd is a deadbeat, but in my opinion, they're just as guilty because they take no action. Shit doesn't get done all by itself. Kudos to you, Mom :)
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  • tig594tig594 member
    If it wasn't your fault then who cares what other people think.  You know the truth and that's all that matters.  

    As far as your LOs siblings, don't give up on the possibility that your LO might have relationships with them at some point in her life.  It's possible.  Probably more so with his ex and not his current.  My DD has one older brother who is 19 (and will become a daddy himself in June, I think!) and I pushed gently for him to have a relationship with his newest sister.  I told him I know it may be awkward now but he's all she's got sibling-wise and she'll need him to help scare off the boys when she gets older.  She's still little, but he's hung out with her a few times now. He has like 3-4 other siblings from his mom who I met over the summer.  She's actually not that bad.  I mean, we'll never be BFF's but I can tolerate her and she considers me her son's step-mom even though I'm no longer with his dad.  Weird.  But remember that families come in all shapes and sizes these days.  
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