WWYD? - re:baptism

JoNi2010 · December 2013

None of my family or close friends are religious so I've never been to a baptism. So this is the first time I got an invite to one (my friend is having one). I don't know how it usually works but on her invite, there is a brunch at 10:30am and then the baptism starts at like 1:30 or 2pm. This is kind of a long day for me and the LO (cannot get a sitter that long, and would ruin his nap!)

So my question(s) to you guys is this - Is it rude to go to the brunch and not the baptism (I will still bring a gift)? If I decide to decline altogether, do I still have to give her a gift? And what gifts are customary for baptism?

Sorry if I sound naive!! TIA!

blondie42107 · December 2013

Is this an infant baptism? My little ones got picture frames, personalized piggy bank, children's Bible, gifts of money (including savings bonds), small toys. Personally, I enjoyed the small tokens more than money.

I'm Catholic. We had both children baptized with a lunch/dinner following. So church at 1030am (to 1130am), lunch at 12pm at a nearby restaurant. Church at 4pm (to 5pm), dinner at 530pm at a nearby restaurant.

I'd skip brunch but it might be best to attend whichever part LO is likely to be most rested.

LorMor · December 2013

Why don't you ask your friend? Say you'd love to come and celebrate, but can't attend both - which would she prefer you to attend.

JoNi2010 · December 2013

Thanks for all your input!! I just sent a $50 gift to her (just for the newborn, separate fro baptism) and will be making a trip to visit her too to see the baby. So maybe I'll send a small gift for the baptism. I just feel like there is a gift associated with every occasion now whether you attend or not!

lady dixneuf · December 2013

JoNi2010 said:

Thanks for all your input!! I just sent a $50 gift to her (just for the newborn, separate fro baptism) and will be making a trip to visit her too to see the baby. So maybe I'll send a small gift for the baptism. I just feel like there is a gift associated with every occasion now whether you attend or not!

I feel like you don't need to send an additional gift. You've done plenty. I'd never send another gift.

AMT1107 · December 2013

angelacz87 said:

I'm not totally sure on this, but it might be more socially acceptable to skip the brunch and go to the baptism... anyone? I was raised catholic but I'm not exactly a social grace buff.

I was thinking this too, the baptism is the reason for the luncheon. If I was in the situation I would go to the church only. I would feel like I missed the best part of the day and I was only there for food.

In our family we do money, unless, the child is your god child, then we do something religious (cross necklace, bible etc).