January 2014 Moms

Feeling guilty...

I know I should probably be posting this on the preemie board but I'm much more comfortable here. I just have this overwhelming feeling of guilt tonight and I have no idea why. My DS is actually doing really well but for some reason I just feel like such a shit mom for not being able to carry him longer. I feel awful for my body kicking him out before everything was developed, and I feel so bad that he works so hard to do the things I could've done for him. I'm starting to feel guilty because I don't feel like I visit him enough. I usually go at least twice a day sometimes more depending if he has testing and such that I can be there for, but I don't feel like its enough. I just don't want him to ever think I'm a bad mom because I really am trying. I'm really hitting a low right now. Sorry, I just needed to get it out, my DH just doesn't understand.
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Married 8/9/13
Ashton James Rogers 10/29/13

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Re: Feeling guilty...

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  • Awww, sweety, I'm sorry you are feeling down.
    >:D<

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    ********************************************************************************************************

    DS1 born 11/3/06   *   DS2 born 3/29/08   *   DD born 3/15/11  

    Scarlett Mae born 1/14/14                         Our family is now complete!

      

  • I'm so sorry you are feeling like this. Nothing can be further from the truth. you are an amazing Mom who has him right where he needs to be and getting the very best care for him. Everything, including his early delivery, happened just as it was supposed to. He will wear his time in the NICU like a badge of strength. My niece and nephew were in the NICU for months and still tell people the whole story as though they went to war...they just turned 12.
    Chin up. This is temporary and soon enough you will have each other all to yourselves at home.
    Be easy on yourself. You are dealing with more than most people could ever handle. Huge hugs.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Thanks ladies. I'm just really getting down cause I thought this was that one thing I could be good at and do the right way. My body wanted to tell me otherwise.
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    Married 8/9/13
    Ashton James Rogers 10/29/13

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  • Chin up, Lady! You're an amazing mom! Think of all you have been through. Youre extremely resilient! You had no control over your body
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    Baby Chugging born 12.28.13
    induction due to HELLP
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  • I'm sorry you're feeling this way :( I have no experience, but I'm sure it's quite normal to have these feelings. Reach out and talk to somebody if you continue to feel overwhelmed. You're doing an amazing job, I can only imagine how difficult it is.
    DS 2014 ❤
    DD 2016 ❤

  • I don't have any experience, but I just wanted to say that I'm sorry you're having a tough time. I hope your son is big enough and strong enough to be home with you very soon!
  • You did everything you could to keep your little guy on the inside...and you're doing exactly what you need to now! NICU babies are very easily overstimulated so it's best to only go visit him a couple times a day..I know it feels wrong but right now he needs rest and to work on getting bigger! Soon enough he'll be home and yours to hold and snuggle all the time:) you're doing wonderful mama...it'll get better soon!




  • I've been there. And still have an occasional guilt for my first born.
    Chin up. Do what you can for you and baby and leave it at that.  Know that YOU are doing the BEST you can and that is all your son needs.



    Pregnancy TickerBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Huge hugs, honey. There is nothing you could have done differently, and you're doing wonderful now. You are not a bad mom at all. Heck, getting there twice a day is huge! Hang in there. I can't pretend to know what you're going through, but that beautiful baby boy will be home soon.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

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  • You are an amazing mom! You didn't force him out early, there is nothing you could've done differently and I am sure baby knows that! ((hugs))
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  • *hugs* I'm sorry you're feeling this way. You are a wonderful mom.
  • Big hugs to you!
    OHM born 12/16/11, BAM born 1/10/14, mmc 06/30/15
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • Oh hon, there is nothing you could have done differently. The fact that you feel so much guilt and worry about your baby shows how great of a mom you are. Hugs!
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    Mama of boys, Landon (Jan 14) and Harrison (Aug 15).  

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • You did great.  You kept him growing inside as long as you could and delivered a wonderful little boy.  This will pass and soon he will be home with you all of the time.  hugs to you
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    I can't wait to meet you Neva Margaret Rebecca
    Pregnancy Ticker
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