Issue with DD and DH

crene84 · December 2013

I am a SAHM and DH works full-time. DD absolutely adores DH, but it's become a problem. As soon as he walks in the door, she is at his feet. She wants constant attention from him from the second he walks in the door to the second she goes to bed. She also acts up way more around him than she does me..during the day she's so good, but once DH gets home, it takes very little to set her off (normally something to do with him not giving her enough attention).

Have any of you experienced anything similar?

Unknown · December 2013

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Stasi · December 2013

Hmmm, I don't have tons of experience with a difference between me and DH because we both work, but have you maybe tried having your DH set aside 15 minutes or so of pure 1 on 1 time with your DD as soon as he gets in the door? Do you think it could have anything to do with the new baby (he's so cute btw!!!)

I wanted to add: I'm sure it'll work itself out in time, I feel like toddlers go through phases like this. Good luck!

LyndseylovesHugh · December 2013

My DD can be like this too. My H was on the phone when he got home yesterday and she was pissed that he wasn't paying attention to her as soon as he walked in the door. But most days he comes in the door and immediately gives her attention. He holds her, gives her kisses and plays with her while I'm getting dinner ready. And then once he's been home for a while she's back to normal again. So maybe have your H give undivided attention for a bit as soon as he walks in the door.

AKB090609 · December 2013

We often have a similar issue at our house, I try to take DD in to a room with a door when DH is on his way home; that way he can get in the door, change his clothes and decompress for a little while before he is ready to play with her. Once she sees him all bets are off.

MommaP12 · December 2013

I am your DH in our scenario.

This morning DD screamed as I left. She runs to me and I have to pick her up the minute I walk in the door - with my coat on and all. I do everything with her in my arms - take my coat off, change, cook dinner leading up until I put her in her high chair. Mind you, I have a 4.5 year old as well, so I'm trying to give him a ton of attention at the same time so he doesn't feel left out. She doesn't get more naughty necessarily though, not sure what to say about that.

DH stays home with the kids on T/Th and he does DC drop off and pick up since he owns his own business and has more flexibility. They see him much more than the see me.

I think it will pass as most of this stuff does. They don't really know what's going on so when their day "changes" in any way, it's so exciting and overwhelming. Maybe she is so overstimulated from the excitement of daddy returning that she misbehaves as part of her excitement. In any event, as she gets older and communication and understanding change matures, it should fade out.

crene84 · December 2013

Thanks everyone!

Let me add, when DH works late or has work dinners and doesn't get home until after DD is in bed, she continues to be good for me...so it isn't a time of day thing, or a routine thing..it really is him. And he does pick her up as soon as he gets in the door and gives her tons of attention, but it's never enough..he can't ever put her down without her going crazy. And it has been this way for months, so not because of the new baby.

As you all said, I'm sure it'll pass eventually. I just feel bad for DH because he doesn't get any time to himself while she's awake and I know it's hard to walk in the door after a long day and instantly be in parent mode.

Hyaline · December 2013

Yes. DD is actually kind of awful with me some days--it's like she's bored with me--but as soon as DH gets home it's like "DADDY! OMG, DADDY!" and she's little miss smiles for him and wants to be attached to him. He usually gives her some uninterrupted one-on-one time while I finish dinner and that seems to placate her--by the time we're done with dinner, she's happy to toddle around and play on her own again.

Pokedot · December 2013

DS is like this every night when DH gets home. I get home at 4:30 and relieve my mom. He cries for her when she leaves, I get nothing! Haha. The minute DH walks in the door DS is all over him and won't leave his side. I used to take it personal but it's nice that they have the bond they do. DH will usually keep DS occupied while I get things done or even play along with them. I have no real advice but I'm sure she'll outgrow it to a certain extent at some point.

eshee8198 · December 2013

That's DD with me. DH doesn't stay at home, but he gets home earlier, so she spends a lot of one-on-one time with him before I get home. When she sees me walk in, she freaks out, and wants to be attached to me for the rest of the evening. If I try to pee first, she loses her shit. I try to spend as much time with her as possible, and if I need to do something, like make dinner, DH takes her into a room where she can't see me, and redirects her. I just try to be flattered that she's excited to see me!

MommaP12 · December 2013

eshee8198 said:

That's DD with me. DH doesn't stay at home, but he gets home earlier, so she spends a lot of one-on-one time with him before I get home. When she sees me walk in, she freaks out, and wants to be attached to me for the rest of the evening. If I try to pee first, she loses her shit. I try to spend as much time with her as possible, and if I need to do something, like make dinner, DH takes her into a room where she can't see me, and redirects her. I just try to be flattered that she's excited to see me!

same here @eshee8198 I have peed while holding her, sigh.

eshee8198 · December 2013

MommaP12 said:

eshee8198 said:

That's DD with me. DH doesn't stay at home, but he gets home earlier, so she spends a lot of one-on-one time with him before I get home. When she sees me walk in, she freaks out, and wants to be attached to me for the rest of the evening. If I try to pee first, she loses her shit. I try to spend as much time with her as possible, and if I need to do something, like make dinner, DH takes her into a room where she can't see me, and redirects her. I just try to be flattered that she's excited to see me!

same here @eshee8198 I have peed while holding her, sigh.

There's usually at least one dog and a baby in the bathroom with me. Pee party. I think I've said before, but DD tries to help me wipe (she tries to grab toilet paper and then shove it at me). It's a little uncomfortable. For me. The dog and baby think it's great.

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