Adoption
5/10 - Gideon 6/12 Warren
4/11 Started adoption process for 2 siblings through DCF. 10/12 Found out we are licensed! 12/14 Brought 3 week old identical twin girls home from the hospital. Could be at least until Summer 1015 til we know if they are forever ours
We have babies!!!
Sorry I only come and go when I have news, but I really wanted to write about our experience to keep somewherefor the girls, and figured I would post it here, too.
We have been getting quite a few emails from DCF about possible placements, but in the end the Matching Committee hasn't chosen us. Last Wednesday, I saw a missed call from DCF. Usually if I miss a call they leave a voicemail and/or email, but there was nothing. So I emailed my husband to see if they called him, and he immediately called me back. He had just gotten off the phone with them, there were twin girls in the NICU and they were looking for a home to send them to when they were discharged.
Holy cow Wednesday was emotional - my husband and I kept going back and forth about it - we started on our journey only willing to consider kids where DCF had started a case for TPR. We were told that it would be 15 months before that could start in this case. I was a wreck - I kept thinking of someone taking my younger son (he is 18 months) from me and would just start crying (that was awesome while cleaning people's teeth). Finally we both agreed that this was an opportunity we couldn't pass up - we wouldn't be adopting out of birth order, there would be no virtual twinning, and DCF wasn't requiring that one of us quit our jobs (some of the other case we were being considered for were requiring one stay at home parent to help deal with emotional/behavioral issues). Plus my work was 100% willing to let me do whatever I needed to in regards to taking time off until the girls were old enough for day care.
So we said yes, and they let us know the earliest they could be discharged was Monday Dec 2. But unfortunately nobody working the case would be working Thursday (Thanksgiving) or Friday (they all took it as a personal day), so we would get NO updates about the babies until Monday, and that update could be "come get the girls."
It was a nerve wracking weekend - we kept thinking, "Are we REALLY getting them? Will something else come up and change the situation?"
Monday came and DCF called to say they were being released. But two different workers were calling my husband, each telling him something different. One said they girls would be brought to us, the other said we had to be at the hospital. It took most of the morning for my husband to get THAT straightened out - we were to meet the social worker at the hospital at 12:30.
Right when we arrived at the hospital and met up with the social worker, I got a call from DCF. It was a permanency worker who was assigned to the case. I thought that was strange, since I didn't think they got involved until TPR was started, but was so confused and excited I didn't question it.
While we were there going through all the discharge paperwork, the BM called the hospital, which completely freaked me out. I kept trying to hurry things along because I was terrified she was going to show up. One of the nurses kept making comments in a negative way about how excited I was and expressing her opinion of the fact that we have children at home. She was a real peach. But the other nurse was real nice and supportive and made sure we went home with massive amounts of everything. Once we got to really look at the girls we realized we were in for quite a ride - they are almost identical aside from the fact that one has slightly more hair than the other.
We were right next to our pediatrician's office, so I ran in there while my husband stayed in the car with the girls. I handed in what paperwork I had, arranged for the rest to be faxed over, and made them their first appointment for the next day (Tuesday). Then we had to get to the house to meet the social worker and sign all the paperwork. He came over and brought a "voucher" for each girl - a debit card to buy essentials to get us set up. Thankfully we already had two infant car seats from our sons, and one extra crib, and someone was sending us another crib, so the big things were taken care of. We just needed to stock up on some things that I had given away, assuming we would never be placed with one infant let alone two!
The permanency worker came Tuesday, and explained that since both parents have long histories with DCF, she will be aggressively pursuing TPR as soon as she could (she obviously legally has to go through all the motions of finding relatives, etc). But first they have to get DNA confirmation on bio-dad (the one mom named has not stepped forward yet to acknowledge them). So fingers crossed on that one. As far as the mom is concerned it is almost without question that TPR will be granted without issue.
Things are crazy here, as can be expected with an 18 month old, 3.5 year old, and two 3 week olds. But I LOVE it. We've got the full house we've always wanted! And all the kids are really close in age, something else we were hoping for. The girls have been very needy during the day (which is expected because (a) they are newborns and (b) there are withdrawal issues), but have been pretty good at night. Last night they were only up for quick feedings at 1 and 4. My older son adores them, and my younger son just points and belly laughs when he sees them. It is adorable.
We are crossing our fingers that we will get to adopt them, but for now are just thrilled to get to keep them safe and love them while the case is being figured out.
5/10 - Gideon 6/12 Warren
4/11 Started adoption process for 2 siblings through DCF. 10/12 Found out we are licensed! 12/14 Brought 3 week old identical twin girls home from the hospital. Could be at least until Summer 1015 til we know if they are forever ours
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Re: We have babies!!!
Mother of two wonderful boys! Blessed through adoption.
*May Siggy Challenge - Parenting Fails*
5/10 - Gideon 6/12 Warren
4/11 Started adoption process for 2 siblings through DCF. 10/12 Found out we are licensed! 12/14 Brought 3 week old identical twin girls home from the hospital. Could be at least until Summer 1015 til we know if they are forever ours
5/10 - Gideon 6/12 Warren
4/11 Started adoption process for 2 siblings through DCF. 10/12 Found out we are licensed! 12/14 Brought 3 week old identical twin girls home from the hospital. Could be at least until Summer 1015 til we know if they are forever ours