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Potty training

taryn30taryn30 member
in Special Needs
My son is 3.5 and has no interest in potty training! I have tried incentives but he is adamant that he does not want to. Any thoughts or ideas? Thanks!
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Re: Potty training

  • MaxandRubyMaxandRuby member
    My son is 4 and we have been training him since the late part of June.  We are stuck in the he will rarely tell us when he has to go so we (as in whatever adult has him: school, parents, or daycare) keeping an eye on the clock.  He knows what it is and when it happens, he just rarely tells us.  I am not sure how to get over that hump of him simply telling us.  I big issue is that he physically cannot push down or pull up his pants or get himself on or off of the toilet by himself so he is reliant on someone taking him to and from the bathroom and getting him on and off the toilet. We are working on the undressing/dressing at home, at daycare, and through IEP goals at school.

    This is what we did. Not sure if this will help you or not.  We started our potty training immediately after our trip to Walt Disney World.  You all may think I am evil or something but we told him prior to leaving that we were going to be giving all of his diapers to Mickey Mouse so he could give them to babies who need them and that since he was so big he did not need them anymore.  We made sure to see Mickey too and then reinforced that we gave them to Mickey.  On occasion he tells me that Mickey gave his diapers to babies because they need them.  Now, he still wears a pull up at nap (now called nap underwear), at night (now called night underwear) and when we travel (when he has to go he goes, he cannot hold it at that point). Yes he knows that they are actually diapers but he calls them nap and night underwear as well as his DCP.

    We used to do rewards but faded them out after awhile because he would basically go to the bathroom to get the reward.  We used Wii which is high value for him.  He would get 2 games if he peed in the potty and 5 games if he pooped or peed and pooped in the potty.  Then it turned into he got the reward for TELLING us he had to go and then actually following through with it.  Again, he seemed more interested in the reward then the actual learning of telling us so we faded it out.

    I am probably not much help.  We are not out of it yet and I am much annoyed at that fact. I do not believe his CP is causing a potty training issue.


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  • JoJoGeeJoJoGee member
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  • thefuturemrskudlathefuturemrskudla member
    My son turned 4 in October, and we have been training for about 2 weeks with success. He wasn't really interested but did know what a potty was for, that big boys used it, and his best friend no longer had diapers. So, I took diapers away completely. Even at night. He has to feel what being wet it, so he will want to avoid it. He does get potty presents, which motivate him. Sometimes I will took him every 2 hours or when we noticed signs. He will tell.us when he has to pee, but not poop. He will tell us he did poop. He has problems with chronic constipation, so I expect this to take longer. Often he'll say I need privacy, which means he has to poop.
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  • realisticdreamsrealisticdreams member
    What is your child's diagnosis?   We have bladder/kidney problems galore here so potty training is probably my least favorite word or topic lol.  

    I do think it depends on your childs diagnosis, and I don't think consulting with a pediatric urologist is out of the realm of reasonable.  

    Good luck.
    DD1(4):VSD & PFO (Closed!), Prenatal stroke, Mild CP, Delayed pyloric opening/reflux, Brachycephaly & Plagiocephaly, Sacral lipoma, Tethered spinal cord, Compound heterozygous MTHFR, Neurogenic bladder, Urinary retention & dyssynergia, incomplete emptying, enlarged Bladder with Poor Muscle Tone, EDS-Type 3. Mito-Disorder has been mentioned

    DD2(2.5): Late term premie due to PTL, low fluid & IUGR, Reflux, delayed visual maturation, compound heteroygous MTHFR, PFAPA, Bilateral kidney reflux, Transient hypogammaglobulinemia, EDS-Type 3


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  • smerkasmerka member
    My older son turned 4 in September and refuses to even sit on the potty fully clothed. His pediatric urologist is adamant about not pushing him to potty train. So we continue to wait.
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  • malcivarmalcivar member
    I have no advice but will also be following this thread.  My son is 4 and we've been trying for months to no avail.  His school keeps telling us he's just not ready but I worry because he'll be in Kindergarten next September and I don't know what to do if he's not potty trained by then.  I know it's 9+ months away but I'm genuinely concerned.
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  • mountainkimimountainkimi member
    DS did not have an interest in potty training until about 2 months after his 4th birthday. One day I asked him if he wanted to wear underwear and he said yes. There was no turning back from there. School said that he did pretty well once he was ready compared to other kids. Probably because he was older. He is almost 5 now. He still has accidents on occasion but hasn't worn a diaper since that day.

    As an FYI...DS has apraxia and also has gross and fine motor skills delays. Some sensory issues as well. He gets PT, OT, speech and SEIT services. He is not on the spectrum.
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  • pastaladypastalady member
    I cannot recommend the potty journey book enough. Our local autism society gave it to me. It was the only thing that worked for us. It's is tailored towards sn kids.
    [IMG]http://i50.tinypic.com/30xit04.jpg[/IMG]
    Olivia Kate is almost 4!
    Diagnosed with autism this year and doing great!
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  • MaxandRubyMaxandRuby member
    @pastalady can you give a summary of what The Potty Journal said?
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  • pastaladypastalady member
    Basically we started with all diaper changes in the bathroom, so she would associate it with that.
    Then you chart every time your child goes. I think 2 weeks of charting so you get an idea of their natural bathroom schedule.
    Once you know that you make a schedule. So it may look like this:
    Wake up 7 am sit on potty
    Then every 2 hours. Only for 5 minutes, using a timer.
    If you catch something, hooray, celebrate with a reward that is strictly for potty training.
    For DD that was potato chips. The book is clear that whatever you pick, you cannot give that reward for anything else. DD had never had a potato chip, and ended up loving them. But she only got one for going potty, no other time. Could be a tv show, iPad use, etc.
    Once we saw what time she naturally had to go, we adjusted the schedule. So if I put her on the potty 9 , nothing happened but she peed in her panties at 9:20 I would adjust the time. 
    So start with 9:15 for a week.
    It was very intense and time consuming but she trained in 2 weeks. 
    And this is a kid who refused to sit on the potty clothed even. She never told us she had to go, etc.
    You also have to phase out the reward which can be tough but DD was fine. 
    We also used underwear from day one, so tons of laundry and accidents lol!
    [IMG]http://i50.tinypic.com/30xit04.jpg[/IMG]
    Olivia Kate is almost 4!
    Diagnosed with autism this year and doing great!
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