June 2013 Moms

What would you do differently?

Would you do anything differently with your next baby? I was thinking now with just 6 months of experience if I would...

Here is what I would try to do:

1. I would try very hard to put the baby down to sleep awake. I'm told it helps with self soothing.

2. I would try not to swaddle. It was so hard to break the swaddle!

How about you?

Re: What would you do differently?

  • The RnP has been both a blessing and a curse. I think I would put an actual crib in my room and just move it when the time comes into the baby's room. This transition has been hell on me!!

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    IVF #1 September 2012, beta #1: 213; beta #2: 580. Expecting Twins! 
    EDD 6/9 lost one angel at 9w3d :( 
    Baby boy arrived 6/1/13
    FET #1 10/14, BFP -Chemical Pregnancy :(
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  • I would use the swaddles sooner. It took me a few weeks to remember that I had them. I would also have him sleep in his crib since day 1
  • I definitely will stop swaddling much sooner as well. Also I would probably try supervised naps on tummy to prevent flat head. My LO is so used to back sleeping he won't nap any other way.
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  • The swaddle too. We are in the sleep suit now and getting ready to wean from that . Goodbye STN .

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  • Making my husband wake up for motn soothing. Even if it means he needs to give a bottle!
  • Naps! It took us a long time for ds to nap on his own!

    6.21.13
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  • 1. Trying to put he/she down when they're drowsy....Joseph is so dependant on being walked to sleep....

    2. I hope with number two we can have it on a better schedule....with Joseph we just go with the flow, which is nice but also annonying when trying to schedule appointments for him.


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  • more of a schedule with naps, he hates to nap!

     

     

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  • Start taking lecithin earlier and cut down on saturated fat earlier to hopefully avoid getting any plugged ducts.

    Move her out of our room earlier. She didn't leave til 5 mos and would have been fine earlier.

    Right after birth, I'd clarify more clearly who we have asked to come help. We asked MIL to stay with us and help, and decided that meant FIL could stay with us too while he was working in our city. It was terribly inconvenient when I was still crying a lot and trying to figure out Breastfeeding. I think next time we won't invite MIL at all, we will just ask them to watch N.
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  • The first thing is I will not get pregnant while overweight. I am finally down to a healthy weight but it has been so hard. I dropped the 45 I gained while pregnant really easily. It was the next 25 that were pretty stubborn!

    I will not worry about what other people think next time. I used to be so self conscious of whether I was feeding at the right time, the right way, if he was sleeping how he was "supposed" to be. I will be okay with just trusting my instincts from the beginning.

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  • Sleep in the crib from day 1. My son is 6 months and he still won't sleep or nap in the crib. Transitioning has been a total failure.

    Just say no to the paci. He's now dependent on that sucker, and he's developed no self-soothing skills.

    Also be in shape before getting pregnant. Mine was somewhat of a surprise. I was actually planning to try to start concieving in June, instead I gave birth then. I'd like to drop about 30 pounds before we decide to try again.
  • amie444 said:
    The swaddle too. We are in the sleep suit now and getting ready to wean from that . Goodbye STN .

    This is us too. We only started the sleep suit in mid-November because LO would roll onto his tummy and get angry over and over again. But now he's able to roll onto his side in the suit so it won't be long til he can roll all the way over. I started weaning last night and it was about a 40 minute battle to get him to fall asleep. Then he woke up at 9pm at which point I put him in the suit. I'm taking the "as painless as possible" route with the weaning.
  • +1 to the bottle introduction, lo still refuses a bottle.

    6.21.13
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  • Hmm, I'll try harder to avoid an induction because I'd really like to experience "going into labor". Also, I think I might attempt a natural birth. Last time I 100% planned on an epi, it was just a matter of when. I'll try to do more tummy time and pay closer attention to early sleepy cues. Also, not be so freaked out about co sleeping. I was terrified to bed share at first, but once we started everyone sleeps great!



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  • I'm not going to write a birth plan. I was so set on it that when nothing went according to plan, I was disappointed. I'm just going to research all the possibilities over again and go with the flow.

    I also refuse to be team green ever again.
    BFP #1: due 6/17/2013, DD born 6/25/13
    BFP #2: due 6/30/2017, MMC found 12/7/2016
    BFP #3: due 10/21/2018 
  • @violet1183. I have such mixed emotion about your response! Lol. On the one hand, I am happy i just didn't screw up and on the other I am sad that it doesn't work! I had images of baby # 2 just going off to sleep peacefully! Lol
  • EmAzeem said:

    I would listen more to my gut than stupid drs. I won't be induced unless medically necessary. I will research a midwife instead of an OB. I truly believe Azeem would have come on his own if I wasn't induced a day after my due date and I probably would have avoided a c section.

    I too had a bad doctor experience. Next time I will listen to my gut and not just accept everything the doctor says. I should have stood up for myself and my baby last time. FTM mistake.
  • I was induced and had a c section and was seeing a midwife my whole pregnancy. I'm told I am a candidate for vbac also. Midwives run the show here in most labor hospitals in Australia. If you use publics health care (which is free) you see a midwife and a doctor once during your pregnancy. You only see a doctor regularly if you are high risk or there is some type of problem. My midwife had me start seeing a doc every other week because the baby was on the larger side. I can't say enough how much I love the midwives. Although I've only had a baby abroad and don't know what it would be like in the USA.
  • If we have another one I'm going to try a natural birth. I'm all for epidurals, but this last time I had one I got a spinal headache, and ever since then I've have some issues with headaches and neurological issues. They say its not tired together....but I'm not convinced. I fully believe its messed me up!
    If I do decide to get Ann epi next time, any onset of a headache I'm jumping to get a blood patch right away. I missed out on a week of being able to hold and love on my baby!!

    I will also introduce a bottle earlier. DS1 took a bottle and nursed from the beginning. DS2 never ever took a bottle. Then with Owen I was talked out of giving him one because of nipple confusion. I don't buy it...I think they are confused later on.

    I will also want to spend a few hours alone with my hubs and new baby before we introduce him to everyone else. It was very chaotic.
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  • amberdt03amberdt03 member
    edited December 2013
    I would like to go without pain meds for the next one. I was dilated to a 7 when I got the epidural. The contractions were starting to hurt a little bit, but nothing I wasn't able to to tolerate at the time. I was scared to see how painful they were going to get. With a bunch of friends that are having babies now, I find myself looking back and thinking I could have gone longer without the epi.

    Edit: My husband promised me we would go team green with the next one also.
    BFP#1 6/4/12 EDD 2/10/13 M/C 6/12/12
    BFP#2 9/28/12 EDD 6/5/13 J.B. born 6/6/13

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  • Next time I will ask more questions and not just take the docs word for everything. Also I won't let anyone hold my baby until I've had enough time with her. I ended up getting a c section after 2 days of labor. I only held her for a few moments but I was so tired after everything I fell asleep for an hour. when I woke up she was being passed around to my family and friends who came to the hospital. That still bugs me but not much I can do about it now haha
  • @zigspective if it didn't happen to myself, I wouldn't have believed it. The amount of PP blood still amazes me. That and the clots that fell out (TMI, but they looked like liver cutlets. Gross!). My csection was started at 3:30 and they did have to find a different surgeon from a different floor to assist. I just wish my doctor was there. I think the lady OB was overtired and stressed out with my wonky labor and just wanted him out safely. She should be thankful that she didn't do anything to my son or else we'd have serious issues!!

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    IVF #1 September 2012, beta #1: 213; beta #2: 580. Expecting Twins! 
    EDD 6/9 lost one angel at 9w3d :( 
    Baby boy arrived 6/1/13
    FET #1 10/14, BFP -Chemical Pregnancy :(
    Everyone Welcome

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  • I haven't done much differently. Being on baby #2 I know that eventually, they grow out of everything and you can either work through it now to not have to deal with weaning from XYZ later or you can go with what works now and wean later.



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  • I would let DH do more. I'm a control freak when it comes to the kids (soothing, etc.) so with both kids I'm the only one that can put them to bed. I need to let DH have more control of that from the start, bc R freaks out if anyone but me tries to soothe him back to sleep. Which makes for one exhausted mama.

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  • GalLauraGalLaura member
    edited December 2013
    @violet1183. It's worse than Santa. HahAhaha. :)

    Edit spelling.
  • Next time I would have a doula and I would be ADAMANT about breastfeeding RIGHT away.  I feel like most of my BF struggles were because I didn't get much help at the hospital. 

    I would babywear more in the early days in a better carrier than what I had to start with this time around (Bjorn though eventually switched to a Mai Tei).

    I would also embrace bedsharing and not tell people who I know will tell me how bad it is! 
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  • I feel so blessed that LO has been so easy with all of the milestones and behaviors. I personally think we've done very well with things.  The only thing I can think that I would do differently would be pump waaaaaay more on maternity leave. I didn't make it as long as I wanted to breastfeeding. 5 solid months was good, but I was hoping for closer to 9 minimum.
  • Hmmm...

    I think I wish I would have been more assertive with everyone after having my son, just because I'm a ftm, doesn't mean I'm clueless...allow me to figure out things that work best for our family. I also regret sharing so much with others as far as parenting and family decisions, not everyone shared in our excitement. Everyone had something to say about my desire to return to work but none of them knew our financial situation and none of them were going to contribute to our household financially so...forget them. I do wish we would have saved more because I hadn't anticipated being out of work this long and being on one income has been stressful. 
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  • I would trust my lactation consultant over the hospital pedi about the need for "supplementing" next time. DD lost some weight, pedi freaked us out about the need to supplement, when it was really just normal infant weight loss. Nothing against formula, but we then had nipple confusion issues and I had to use a nipple shield for the first three months.

    I would not allow so many people to visit in the early days, unless they plan to cook meals, help around the house, etc. Although, next time I will need people to entertain DD as I deal with a newborn.

    And, I would stop questioning my instincts, and just do what DH and I feel is right. Everyone wants to give advice, but we know our baby best and we know what works for our family. 

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