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Just need to vent..stupid family members

Kelly_12Kelly_12 member
in Preemies
So my ped told us we don't have to go under extreme quarantine for RSV season, just be very cautious and careful.
I've told all my family about it and how we can't be around sick people, especially kids etc.
Last weekend we had to miss my nieces 2nd birthday party because she had a cold. The only reason I even knew this ahead of time was because I called my brother that morning to confirm everyone was healthy...even though our mom had already reminded him earlier in the week to let me know if anyone was sick.
Fast forward to today, they were in town and visiting my sister and were gonna stop by for a quick visit and so I could give her her gift.
My sister told them to not come in to my house, she saw Dakotah was still coughing up a storm and told them to not come in. (I was unaware of this at the time)

So they get here, my brother comes to the door and says "I think I may be coming down with a cold do you want us to not come in" I said no it's ok just stay in the other room and don't touch him. Ok, done. Well they all come in and my niece starts coughing like crazy, they keep telling her not to touch the baby's toys or him, but I looked at them both and was like "seriously??" They stayed for about 5 min and left. My brother goes "well she's had this cold for a week, she's not contagious anymore". Like WTF?!?
I'm livid, my husband is super pissed.. And now we are sanitizing/washing/going crazy.

I just can't believe how dumb he could be?! And even after my sister (who is also a mom and gets that kids spread germs easily) told them to not come in...

I am mad at them, I'm mad at myself for letting them in..but how was I to know how sick she was still?? They knew!
Ugh..end rant.

This is going to be a long winter.
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Re: Just need to vent..stupid family members

  • ashleymarie512ashleymarie512 member
    Annoying!!! I'd be mad too. We're not under quarantine either, but being cautious. I'd be super pissed if people came in, knowing my expectations, and hacked all over my house.
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  • KTZ17KTZ17 member
    How oblivious is your brother? I can't understand how people don't get that you shouldn't be around a preemie when you are/have been sick. Or any infant for that matter! A parent should understand. I'm sure your DS will be fine since he was in the other room and no one sick touched him. On a related note, back in the end of October I was at SIL1's baby shower and SIL2 was telling her friend that they offer flu shots at work but she never gets one. I interrupted and said do you think you can get one this year for your niece and soon to be born nephew? She says no, if I'm sick I just won't be around them. Then I kept pushing and said, well, my DD can get a flu shot in November because she'll be old enough, but SIL1's baby is due in December so he won't be able to get one. She still won't get a flu shot. People don't seem to understand that you might be coming down with something even if you feel fine and you can still be contagious if you've had a cold for a week. I think unless you're a preemie parent you just don't get the worry!

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  • Kelly_12Kelly_12 member
    I agree... Because I feel like even if he wasn't a preemie they still should know better than to bring their sick 2 year old around a baby!
    But especially with all I've told him, and my sister telling him to not come in, like grrr just makes me so angry!

    I feel like a lot of the RSV "rules" like wash your hands before touching him, etc should apply to ANY baby so why are people such morons about it? Especially people with kids!!

    He also made a comment that made me want to punch him a few weeks ago "oh a buddy at work just had a preemie, he was 3 weeks early, his kid is fine tho".....um ya that's because that's not really that early and you can't compare his to mine!
    The only thing I will say in his defense at all is that before becoming a preemie mom I never knew how much every single week mattered and had no idea that 6 weeks early would cause us a month in NICU and all his minor issues. But that being said, hearing about all of this from his sister you think my brother would get it now.

    Clearly still ranting and mad.. :S
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  • Kelly_12Kelly_12 member
    His wife (my dumbass SIL) also said "oh this may be our only chance to see him this winter I guess eh, hopefully everyone's healthy at Christmas" so like, they get that being around sick people isn't ok, yet still came in my house... Ugh.
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  • LaciJaxxLaciJaxx member
    I totally understand. We also are not on Dr ordered lockdown but I am still paranoid. Every time we have a visitor or go outside the house I worry for atleast the next few days that LO is going to get sick. I make everyone wash their hands and use hand sanitizer before they touch him. And my DH and I even go so far as to change clothes after going out, especially to Walmart and the gym. Ick!! Our family seems to he understanding but we also live hundreds of miles from all of them. My FIL smokes cigars and I won't let him hold LO unless he's washed and changed clothes. I think he understands though. My MIL retired as a nurse professor so I'm sure she's told him too. I would be pissed if anyone did to us what they did to you.
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers

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    Pregnancy #1 EDD 1/20/13, D&C for unexplained miscarriage at 12w
    Pregnancy #2 EDD 8/28/2013, Carson was born on 6/28/2013 at 31w - spent 37 days in the NICU
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  • Kelly_12Kelly_12 member
    I called my mom and ranted to her about it and she said she doesn't get it as she's told my brother too how important it is that my LO doesn't get sick and can't be around sickness.

    The only thing I can think is that he's really that dumb to think that because she's had a cold for a week she shouldn't be contagious anymore. Ugh.

    I am so stressed about Xmas parties and stuff now, today was the first day I was like OMG a sick person get away from my baby!!!

    Those of you not under strict quarantine but just being cautious, are you limiting Xmas events, even just family ones?
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  • ashleymarie512ashleymarie512 member
    edited December 2013
    I'm not necessarily limiting Cmas events, but I plan on checking with everyone that will be there if they're sick or symptomatic prior to. On my dads side my aunt has cancer and also has to be careful so hopefully everyone is cognizant of both.

    I still haven't taken her to work and don't plan on it right now. Also probably won't go to church or non family gatherings this year.
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  • Throw3ksThrow3ks member
    I hear ya. Family doesn't get it. I've given up at this point. If ppl come over we have a discussion at the door. If we go to someone's house I ask before we go how everyone is. Ain't no one got time for a sick baby.
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