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Speaking of birthday parties

MickeyM04MickeyM04 member
in Parenting after a Loss
I've been wondering about this.  So for DS's first birthday party, we invited all of our family (DH's entire family is out of town so only his parents and sister came), and all of our friends (which we don't have many) regardless of whether they have kids or not.  So I would say about 60 people were invited but we had 30 come, which was what we expected when we invited all the out of towners (it was more of a politeness thing since we were inviting my aunts/uncles/cousins that we should invite DH's side).  

OK so 30 was manageable but it was definitely expensive food wise and I like serving a meal at a party.  I'm one of those people who thinks that if everyone is schlepping their butts to my house and bringing a gift we can at least feed you a casual meal.  I also got the impression that my friends without kids didn't have the best time, even though I did serve alcohol which kept them pretty appeased.  But the problem is my friends are all friends with each other, so I felt weird inviting half our friend group (the ones with kids) and then excluding the others. 

Now I am wondering what the precedent is on this...do I have to keep inviting all these same people because they were invited last time?  Can I not invite the people without kids because honestly they probably don't want to be there anyway?  Can I not invite the out of towners because I don't need to spend $20 on the invitations that I know are going to get "No" responses?  What is the etiquette on all this?  I know this is far in advance but it's just something I have wondered about and my curiosity was re-ignited when I was reading the posts below about who was invited to the first birthday parties (i.e. a lot of people only inviting the friends with kids, etc.).  
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers 
Lilypie First Birthday tickers 

BFP #1 6/28/11 ~ EDD 3/7/12 ~ m/c 7/15/11 at 6w2d
BFP #2 8/29/11 ~ EDD 5/12/12. 4/25/12: Our take home baby is here!
 BFP #3 8/27/13 ~ EDD 5/11/14.  4/27/14:  Our second take home baby is here!

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Re: Speaking of birthday parties

  • adoxyinherearadoxyinherear member
    I would say a first birthday party is "special" and you can get away with a smaller guest list next time. I know I don't intend to throw big parties for DD every year! They do get expensive. 

    If you do get roped in to inviting more than you want to feed... I made up a lot of pulled pork in advance of DD's party, which is filling and goes pretty far. I think I spent maybe $12-15 on a roast? And we had about 30 people, too.
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    imageimageimageTTC since 07/11 | natural m/c 08/11 | BFP 12/6/2011 | Elinor Anna born 8/18/2012 | BFP #2 1/16/2014
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
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  • 4legsRbest4legsRbest member
    edited December 2013
    Agree with both pps! 1st birthdays are special. I would think the 2nd is just family and friends who have littles he plays with. 

    I can't believe you are thinking about his 2nd birthday already!!
    Me: 37 DH: 40 TTC since 9/09
    #1 BFP 1/10/11; missed m/c discovered 7w5d
    IF Dx: Endo, hetero MTHFR mutation, poor morphology
    #1 IUI: 1/18/12 = BFN
    #1 IVF/ICSI 4/2/12 = 2 x 7-cell and 1 x 5-cell transferred (3dt) = BFP!!
    H was born at 41w2d on 12/29/12 - be still my heart!
    #2 IVF/ICSI 1/19/14 = 2 x 8 cells transferred (3dt) = BFP!! EDD 10/09/14
    M&W born at 37 weeks on 9/18/14 - I am the momma of 3 boys!!!

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  • MickeyM04MickeyM04 member
    @4legsRbest, I am just crazy, it's still 5 months away, but yes, it is ridiculous!  J will probably have to have an early party this year just in case!  If this LO comes as early as he did, she will be born the day before his birthday!
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers 
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers 

    BFP #1 6/28/11 ~ EDD 3/7/12 ~ m/c 7/15/11 at 6w2d
    BFP #2 8/29/11 ~ EDD 5/12/12. 4/25/12: Our take home baby is here!
     BFP #3 8/27/13 ~ EDD 5/11/14.  4/27/14:  Our second take home baby is here!

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