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Paranoid, uncomfortable and depressed about job search

lorist202lorist202 member
in Working Moms
I don't know where to begin...  I work in HR, and I'm having trouble finding a position, so I've been going through temp agencies.  I'm currently 17 weeks pregnant, and I'm persuing positions through 2 different agencies- neither of which know that I'm expecting, or I'm working with the other agency.  I have one interview set up already, and another is pending.

I hate working through agencies, and I hate feeling sneaky, but let's face it, if the agent told the client, "I have a great candidate, but she's expecting" they would say, "OK, hold off for now, and let's see the other resumes."  I'm not saying it's right, or even legal, but I work in HR, and I'm saying that perfectly good candidates get overlooked every day because when there is a pile of great resumes and only time to interview 10 applicants, it happens.

While these agencies are working hard to get me interviews for these positions, I feel like I'm just waiting for the right time to tell them that they are going to end up with egg on their face, when they tell the client after the fact that I'm pregnant.  Thanks for letting me get this off my chest....  
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Re: Paranoid, uncomfortable and depressed about job search

  • TheBorg7of9TheBorg7of9 member
    Well... maybe if you change your outlook on it, then other people will too. If you work in HR and someone passes over a qualified pregnant candidate, couldn't you try to argue for the pregnant woman and point out that she is still the best candidate, etc...

    We should not be made to feel guilty for looking for a job while pregnant and attitudes definitely need to change, why not start with you. :)
    My TTC History:
    2009: missed miscarriage #1 at 9 weeks (trisomy 16)
    2010: Infertility
    2011: Diagnosis and treatment (low sperm count, anastrozole for DH, clomid for me + IUI)
    2012: Baby #1
    2014: Baby #2
    October 2015: missed miscarriage #2 at 11 weeks (trisomy 22)
    March 2016 BFP#5, due November 2016.

    My Charts since 2009

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  • daisy662daisy662 member
    Just wanted to say good luck. I'm in HR and I understand...
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  • djm31012djm31012 member

    first of all, your son is very cute! love him!

    second...i feel you. its so stressful to look for new jobs but you dont owe these agencies anything. its their job to work for you to find you positions you are qualified for. its between you and the perspective job employer to figure out how to handle you being pregnant/taking leave etc. So dont feel sorry for the agenices. They will be making money off you--it doesnt matter!

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  • FemShepFemShep member
    Have you thought about telling the agency that you're looking for a short-term situation for now, and that you'll be looking for a permanent position after your LO is born (assuming that's the case)?

    As you said, the agencies you're working with will realize fairly soon that you're expecting, and only available for another 4-5 months or so.  Their client relationships are very important to them, and they may be more likely to help you if you're upfront about what you're looking for.
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  • lorist202lorist202 member
    FemShep said:
    Have you thought about telling the agency that you're looking for a short-term situation for now, and that you'll be looking for a permanent position after your LO is born (assuming that's the case)?

    As you said, the agencies you're working with will realize fairly soon that you're expecting, and only available for another 4-5 months or so.  Their client relationships are very important to them, and they may be more likely to help you if you're upfront about what you're looking for.
    HA!  I tried this.  The lady at the first agency wanted nothing to do with me after I was "upfront" with her.  She continually posts multiple positions online that I am qualified for, and all are temp positions.  She seems to have trouble filling them, and she won't even take my calls.  Lesson learned. 

    As much as I hate it, the only way I'm going to get a job while I'm pregnant is if I get in front of the actual client and sell myself.  I'll disclose my pregnancy upon receiving an offer to hire.  Hate it, but necessary.
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  • FemShepFemShep member
    lorist202 said:
    FemShep said:
    Have you thought about telling the agency that you're looking for a short-term situation for now, and that you'll be looking for a permanent position after your LO is born (assuming that's the case)?

    As you said, the agencies you're working with will realize fairly soon that you're expecting, and only available for another 4-5 months or so.  Their client relationships are very important to them, and they may be more likely to help you if you're upfront about what you're looking for.
    HA!  I tried this.  The lady at the first agency wanted nothing to do with me after I was "upfront" with her.  She continually posts multiple positions online that I am qualified for, and all are temp positions.  She seems to have trouble filling them, and she won't even take my calls.  Lesson learned. 

    As much as I hate it, the only way I'm going to get a job while I'm pregnant is if I get in front of the actual client and sell myself.  I'll disclose my pregnancy upon receiving an offer to hire.  Hate it, but necessary.

    Wow, that sucks. SMH and wishing you luck.
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  • iverske9iverske9 member
    I didn't tell my last job that I was 11 weeks pregnant because of the reasons you stated but more so I truly believe it has very little bearing on me as a worker. I have had a child before so I know I do not want to be a stay at home mother and I can handle it. I excel at my job and now even 28 weeks pregnant with a 2 year old toddler I am now excelling at my job now after 3 months. 

    You have every right to keep it to yourself so make them recognize what an amazing asset you would be at your job. 
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  • lorist202lorist202 member
    iverske9 said:
    I didn't tell my last job that I was 11 weeks pregnant because of the reasons you stated but more so I truly believe it has very little bearing on me as a worker. I have had a child before so I know I do not want to be a stay at home mother and I can handle it. I excel at my job and now even 28 weeks pregnant with a 2 year old toddler I am now excelling at my job now after 3 months. 

    You have every right to keep it to yourself so make them recognize what an amazing asset you would be at your job. 
    Thank you for posting this.  It's hard to put into words the reason for withholding such information, but this is well said, and will surely get my point across.
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