Encouraging Picky Toddler to Eat

Emerald27 · December 2013

So, DS is 2 and has never really been a big eater. Unless it's a very very small bite of what he's eating, he will spit anything (even stuff he likes) out after chewing for a few seconds. He doesn't eat any veggies, and he only sometimes will eat fruit. And by eat, I mean chew...

He talks about tomatoes and carrots, and he likes the colors and smells of food. He also enjoys helping us make food. I'll let him "beat" the eggs at breakfast, or stir the veggies, and we do a lot of baking together. He has a blast, and then doesn't eat any of it.

Lately he's been experiencing some constipation, and I'm thinking that it is at least in part due to his diet. I'd love to get more healthy foods into him. Mamas with toddlers, how did you encourage your kid to eat?

ETA: I've been thinking about making smoothies for him with some veggies, fruit and yogurt, to have for breakfast. Has anyone had luck with smoothies?

ncbelle · December 2013

Eleanor had constipation issues and it definitely impacted her appetite. Honestly, we didn't do anything other than to continue to offer healthy choices and to not start the "favorite food X" for dinner every night just so she'd eat trap. Sometimes toddlers just don't need much to eat - unless weight gain is a concern, I wouldn't worry too much.

For the constipation, don't do cow's milk if you do, try probiotics and flax seed, and push the water. Smoothies are a good option if he'll go for them. I'd also have access to healthy snacks throughout the day. My kids have always eaten a ton between breakfast and lunch and very little at dinner - backwards from how we typically cook!

kcisthebombdotcom · December 2013

We do smoothies. We make ours with kefir which is full of probiotics, flaxseed for fiber, almond milk, and whatever fruits/veggies we have on hand. My dd is prone to constipation and this keeps her regular.

blu-eyedwife · December 2013

My son was also a big smoothie fan for a long time. And like @Nicb13, he thinks spinach is something that is a normal smoothie ingredient. I usually throw half a frozen banana in there, but if constipation is an issue, I'd stick with other fruits/veggies.

I also follow @ncbelle's rule of continuing to offer healthy options, even if he doesn't eat. We had pork and rice noodles last night and he ate very little of the pork. But he doesn't get something else. And it sounds like you follow a similar theory.

The only thing that raises any sort of red flag for me is the fact that usually "picky" toddlers are those that only want to eat certain things, and it sounds like your son doesn't have anything he really eats ("he will spit anything (even stuff he likes) out after chewing for a few seconds.") Does he have any issues with his jaw/teeth/mouth that would cause him pain when chewing?

Emerald27 · December 2013

@blu-eyedwife I don't think he has any physiological issues. I mean, he nurses a lot and has no latch issues, and he has been to the dentist. Neither dentist nor doctor has expressed any concern, and his pedi sort of dismissed me and said that this is normal toddler behavior and that I should just make sure I'm offering a healthy variety of food, and as long as he's gaining weight appropriately, whether or not and how much he eats is up to him.

Ok, there are some things he will eat. He'll eat chocolate (facepalm...thanks, Halloween) and Cheerios. And he'll eat ice cream and cookies and anything sweet. But those aren't offered every day or even more than once a week. Unless he puts too many in his mouth, he'll usually swallow goldfish and other carby things. I just don't like to keep convenience foods around, and he doesn't eat much else...

The only healthy thing I've had relative success with is cheese, but since he's constipated, I don't want to offer him too much cheese. I really want him to eat veggies and fruit, which is why I thought of the smoothies.

ETA: and you're right that we don't offer alternatives to what we make at dinner. He is offered whatever we're eating. He turns his nose up at some things and chews/spits out others, and maybe manages to eat a few bites along the way. He never seems hungry.

sugarbear0524 · December 2013

I went to a workshop given by a certified dietitian about kids and food. Having had my own struggles with food, I want to give my son (also 2) a good foundation so he doesn't struggle like I have.

The main thing I took away from the workshop is that my son has a job and I have one. Mine is to decide what we eat and when. My son's job is to decide how much and even whether he eats. She recommended that we put a healthy meal on the table for the whole family and that's what he can eat. No special meals. He will eat when he's hungry.

Unless your son has sensory issues, I wouldn't worry about it. Just offer a healthy meal and snacks and let him eat what he eats. Their tummies are little and sometimes they just don't eat much.

blu-eyedwife · December 2013

If he likes sweet, have you thought about making things like zucchini/carrot/apple bread? You can control the amount/type of sugar that goes in, and they seem more cookie or cake like.

Apple/banana/pumpkin pancakes would be good for breakfast too and incorporate more fruit.

But overall, if he doesn't seem hungry, I wouldn't worry too much about it.

TiffanyBerry · December 2013

I wonder if it's a sensory issue....?

Emerald27 · December 2013

How do I find out more about this "sensory issue" thing to see if it applies to DS? What does that mean?

ETA: He's right on track developmentally. Has excellent fine motor skills as well as far above average speech. He speaks in complete sentences and has for some time...just thought I'd mention it in case what you're referring to is developmental.

Emerald27 · December 2013

@Regal Mama I'm sure his weight gain is reliant upon nursing. He nurses pretty often for a 2 year old.

musicalmama5 · December 2013

Emerald27 said:

@Regal Mama I'm sure his weight gain is reliant upon nursing. He nurses pretty often for a 2 year old.

Which is probably why he seems to live on air!

=Lee=B · December 2013

I worked for a family with 4 kids and one of them was very similar. It was very much a sensory issue for him. It was evident even when he was 10months. Also, if the food was cut in big chunks he would just lose it, completely melt down. His twin bother loved everything big. For him I needed to cut it into very, very small pieces (like pea size). It was not a tantrum behavior he really just would get so overwhelmed and could not eat it.

What worked, and they still have to do with him at age 6 is tell him very clearly what will be for supper that day, at breakfast. Then a reminder closer to supper. When the food is presented he would be prepared mentally for it.

I'm not sure if any of this will help your son...the point being it is not always just a toddler control behavior. Some kids really, really struggle with food (for whatever reason) and they need us to find ways to help them through it. It sounds like you are doing a lot of really great things to help him with his food relationship.

Can you think about what he does eat and doesn't eat and see if there is a common thread? Is it size, texture, taste, etc. That may help narrow down the reason and help you find a way to help.

cyprissa · December 2013

You've gotten lots of good advice but I'll chime in with some picky eating suggestions in case it isn't sensory related. My kid loves to dip! That's pretty much how I got him to eat veggies...he will dip anything in hummus, pesto, ranch, marinara or ketchup. It's totally a gateway for us and he now eats lots of veggies. Also, we have a 1 bite rule....you have to have at least one bite of everything, every time.

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