Thanksgiving Vents: Post 'em here!
MesmrEwe
member
Let's start the week off with the source of stress for many...
So my IL's are having Thanksgiving tomorrow night, great... I suggested in the beginning when it was still on Thanksgiving that we just make reservations as a family (on behalf of SIL/BIL who also feel the same way when it comes to holidays) so no one would be "stuck" with having to make everything because of the family's food sensitivities (there are Celiac's, Lactose, Ginger, Nut, allergies and Vegetarians in the crowd, we're not talking "simple" adjustments here) and the restaurant we'd go to is attached to a hotel so would be open anyway and they put out a wonderful spread for a reasonable price, but SIL INSISTED that it be at her place... SIL last week wanted to move it to tomorrow since her SIL is having something over at their place on Thursday. Wonderful, I can handle that! Today she tells DH that she wants to have it on Saturday instead because she isn't prepared to which DH tells her that I have plans this weekend with the kids (It's the last weekend of DEER season and I missed most of last weekend) and that I've got a turkey thawing (I HATE turkey, but it was super cheap and DH loves it so I figured I'd make it up for him and freeze most of it), and that I could just make the turkey we've got and take care of it for her if she's that busy (she hasn't gone to the store yet to purchase anything, and at this point it'd be "toss in the oven" section anyway which has happened for many events)... To which SIL went on a rant about how we're never on time and (o.k. - side bar, we tend to be there over an hour and a half before SIL/BIL get there, and about 45 before she's ready with anything anyway)... yea - my vent is not that she's overwhelmed by what she committed herself to doing, it's that at some point, recognize it, either accept offers from people to help, or make the reservations that the rest of the family would prefer, and everyone can go order what they want to eat, be generous with the tipping, and go home stuffed and happy with no one having to stick around and wash dishes, AND, probably be money/stress ahead over trying to make it...
Ugh - my family doesn't do much on Thanksgiving and if we do, we have whatever we decide to make (none of us like Turkey), and we eat it, and we like it, and we love it, and we're thankful for it! And if you don't want to eat it, that's FINE, you eat what you want instead, and be thankful for it! My side is much more relaxed in that respect...
Re: Thanksgiving Vents: Post 'em here!
We have drama every year around the holidays. Usually the drama is centered around who can & can't make it.. .if your reason for not making it is "good enough" and God forbid any traditions get changed like someone cooks something a little differently than how mom always did!
This year is the first year ever I have decided to skip a holiday with my side of the family. I only decided this because my sister is hosting & is hosting not only our family, but her husband's too. Not counting myself, DH & DS, that is already about 12 people, 5 of which are young, loud children. Her house is not really large enough to accomodate that many people. it doesn't help that she has the tendancy to take after my mother's hoarding tendancies & there is just too much stuff in the house as well. We would mostly be sitting on a couch with plates of food on our laps. So I decided we would not be joining for the meal, but perhaps will stop by later to visit once some people have left. My sister just doesn't see that there are a lot of people going to be there. We are different people & to me, 12 people crammed into a small space, in the middle of flu season, when I am just shy of 9 mo pregnant is NOT what I call a nice holiday. Plus most people going to be there are not even my family, they are my BIL's family. This might all make me sound like a selfish bi%ch, but I just can't!
<sigh>
My 2 December boys
Oh man ladies!!! I do NOT envy you right now! That close to your due dates isn't exactly the time to be stressing on ANY thing than getting a hospital bag ready to go and enjoying the quiet time...
Tonight's update: Dinner was nice at the SIL's - I thoroughly enjoyed the salad, mashed potatoes, strawberries, and roll that I had (to put it simply , I HATE Turkey - Heck, when I was PG with DS they wanted me to eat something and I got less than a 1/8" bite and was ready to hurl... Always have and never will like the stuff..) However, I'm not one for causing drama, so I sat down with my plate and enjoyed without saying word one (then stopped at Taco Bell tonight for something to eat later on)...
Now tomorrow if not for making "Freezer turkey" for DH (the thing was cheap and now thawed so needs to get cooked), the plan tomorrow is make food that I'll and the kids ENJOY and eat!
If our house was clean I'd have invited over my cousin who lost his wife in September, but even then I'd opt to make him a "take home" container and deliver it to his house because ours is such a disaster zone...
I was sick on Monday so DH got DS an extra day of daycare (or so I thought!)... Mind you, Friday we had to commit weeks ago whether or not the kiddos would be there or not and I said "if you're open DS will be there, if you don't have the numbers to be open, no problem - we're flexible like that because I know some parents NEED the childcare Friday"... Well, DH apparently switched Friday with Monday this week WITHOUT telling me until last night! I'm PISSED! 1) we committed DS to being there this Friday, it's not a normal week for such things... 2) if we had said DS wouldn't be there, the center would have been closed... 3) It's not fair to our DCP in this case since there are so few kids that are going to be there... and 4) I had already made plans this week to do something alone with DD on Friday! She's old enough now to learn how to make things but needs the hand-holding, and I want her to do something in the kitchen with me tomorrow which isn't exactly an easy thing to do with DS here because of hot ovens..