My husband and I tried for 2 months and then got pregnant. Found out on the 18th (of this month). I took 4 home pregnancy tests just so I could see the words pregnant I was so excited. I got the 'What to Expect When Expecting' book and downloaded all the baby apps. Even started watching lots of pregnancy vlogs on youtube. All the while I had been bleeding but thought it was implantation bleeding. The night of the 20th I had severe cramping and started bleeding more. I new instantly something was wrong. The next morning I went to the ER and they gave me a blood test. They told me my HGC levels were about 6 weeks and then brought me to get an ultrasound. No heartbeat. They saw the fetus was where it was supposed to be just no heartbeat. They also saw something in one of my fallopian tubes. The Doc said since he already saw the fetus the odds of there also being an ectopic pregnancy is 1/40,000 and it's probably a cyst that will pass. The Doc said that since I got pregnant so quickly I will probably have the same luck next time and saw no other issues with me carrying a healthy baby to term.
Today is Day 2 and I'm filled with emotions. I know I've only technically known I was pregnant for 4 days I think that's just it. It came about so easy and then it was gone just as fast. I keep trying to remain positive but every other minute I go back to just feeling depressed. This is my first pregnancy with my husband. (We just got married in May.) I keep telling myself this is a part of God's plan and he has other things he has blessed me with and there will be more blessings to come. For whatever reason this was part of the plan. Maybe when I do have my baby I will hold him even tighter, kiss him even more, and appreciate more having gone through this. Through all the crying and sorrow it's amazing to have all the support from friends and fam. But for me right now at this very moment having faith, staying hopeful, and visualizing myself with a healthy baby is shedding some light for me. I'm not gonna lie I still worry that this might happen again but try hard fo shake that feeling. Right now I just want to focus on getting my body and mental health back into shape for when me and my husband try again. This has been therapeutic writing this all out. Thank you and for you ladies going through this with me we'll see the plus sign again. Just have faith.