Last week I picked DS (kindy, pdd-nos) up from his non-school district after school program. He was eating his snack near some older kids (4-5th grade). I sat down with them to let him finish. DS announces that the older kids are his friends. They snicker. The older kid says to me, "I really like DS." I say good, I'm glad he has a buddy here. Then he snickers and says "Yeah, DS really likes to sit on my lap." And they all snicker some more. I'm awful in these circumstances (having one of those am-I-on-the-spectrum-too moments) and I can't decide whether to get the kid to clarify what he is talking about or just let it go. The kids then start dropping some swear words so I just gave them a hard look and left with DS.
I obviously need to get a thick skin and woman up. DH was mad that I didn't say something to the kid and staff immediately. I'm sure this will be the first of many, many times DS is teased not knowing he's being teased. I tried to talk to DS about it and that totally backfired- I asked him why his "friend" (he doesn't even know his name) said that and DS said he just likes to sit on his lap. When I reminded him about personal space and such he burst into tears and said friends sit on laps and he wants to continue to be friends with this kid and then I realize I've probably approached this wrong.
So- how do I approach this with DS? I don't want to create unnecessary anxiety. Maybe I am totally overreacting. DH is going to talk to the staff tonight, too.