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I need advice.

stlmomma27stlmomma27 member
in August 2012 Moms
I need to get input from you ladies. 

Ds is going to be 15 months on the 27th. For a few months now, he has been throwing major fits (mainly just with me). I have tried talking stern, redirecting, popping him on the butt, and holding him from behind and not talking (kind of like a time out) and talking nicely. Nothing seems to work. When he throws a fit, it is a huge fit. I'm talking stiffening his body, throwing his body back and to the sides, screaming, banging into things. Nothing calms him down, except for his paci...sometimes. 

I understand that at 15 months, he is still learning how to control his world and his emotions, but something has to give. He is with me all day, until my dh gets home. He doesn't act this way with dh.

Tell me what you do? How can I help him learn?
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Re: I need advice.

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    alrighthamiltonalrighthamilton member
    Kate went through this really early, at 10 months. Honestly, it's like she hit her terrible twos then. I would just put her on the floor and walk away, ignoring her. I still do this on the occasions she throws fits, and it seems to be the most effective way of dealing with it. I plan to start time outs when she's old enough.
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    jodegaardjodegaard member
    When/why does he typically throw these tantrums?
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    amaiteamaite member
    So far, what has worked for me is picking him up and giving him a hug. He immediately rests his head on my shoulder and starts patting me. He calms very quickly, and then is usually fine when I set him down again.

    I know all babies are different, so just throwing another idea out there.
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    twinkletoes3126twinkletoes3126 member
    When I worked at Head Start, we were supposed to handle tantrums (especially those that could hurt themselves or others) by putting children in a safe place. We had a corner with tons of pillows, blankets and a few books. We would pick them up and nicely and calmly say "you seem very frustrated, you can be upset here" or something to that effect. We would never make a huge deal out of it or force them to stay there. The whole point was for them to be safe, be able to express their emotions, and not get tons of attention. I have no idea what I will do if/when my son throws tantrums but this worked for many kids in the past. Good luck!
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    BluepointToastedBluepointToasted member
    What Lauren said.  Put him somewhere he isn't going to hurt himself and let him go.  Don't give it attention, don't bother trying to get him to stop, just let it run it's course and be careful not to reinforce it. 
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    AmySmolosAmySmolos member
    DS doesn't throw huge fits yet but when he throws one of his I either try to distract or ignore. He's usually over it in a couple minutes but that kid doesn't forget. He will go back to what he wants and try again and again.
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    zbeesma86zbeesma86 member
    Oh yes. DD is doing this too.

    She will just fling herself backwards and smack her head on anything- I hate it.

    If I can see it coming- I usually lay her down and make sure she's safe then I just walk away and wait for her to realize that no one is going to pick her up and give her 'what she wants.' She will come to me and reach for me- I'll pick her up and kiss her and that's it!

    She usually has them out of frustration. She's pointing to something and I have no clue what she wants exactly- I'll hand her things (she's allowed to have) and when she wants things she can't have (like my phone) she freaks!

    Also doing things for herself. Eating especially. She wants to use  utensils. Yet she doesn't exactly know how to eat without spilling (from a spoon) I can give her a fork with a bite on it and she will eat it and hand it back, she can even stick things on her tray and eat them with a fork, but anything with a spoon, that I feed, that she reaches for and I say 'no, let mommy do this one.' She freaks out.

    Hang in there mama! We are mostly all there with you!
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    vic8504vic8504 member
    When DD does this she is normally frustrated because I don't understand her or because I need to change her diaper. I either just lay her down on the floor and let her cry it out or just continue to carry her to change her diaper and by the time we reach the room to change her the fit is over.


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