Never thought it would happen to me — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Never thought it would happen to me

It started 12 days ago. It was a Tuesday. I started bleeding, but it was brown, so I didn't pay much attention to it. Then, three days later on Friday it turned red, which is when I went to the emergency room. There was a heartbeat, my hcg level was at 3600, and I went home with a threatened miscarriage diagnosis.

I had a follow up appt with my doctor that Tuesday, where they did a new ultrasound, the heartrate was a little higher, but he wouldn't tell me the hcg levels, saying all that mattered was the heartbeat was there. He also said there was a cyst, which he said was most likely the cause of the bleeding and not to worry. He didnt even do a pelvic.

So I went home with confidence. Friday cones along, I'm at work and have to leave because I start passing clots and cramping really bad. I call the doctors office, they said to just keep the appt I had for Monday(tomorrow).

So I stay in bed and rest. Saturday I call out of work again because I feel like I'm having Charlie horse like cramps in my stomach and I can hardly stand, and I'm passing even larger clots. My DH has me lay down and he gets up to get a warm towel, but I get a really funny feeling and have to get up to go to the bathroom.

As soon as I pull my underwear down, 2 clumps fall out of me. DH takes me to the hospital, as I can hardly stand and I am crying in pain, he puts the clots in a baggie, not really looking at it, so we can show the doctor(thinking maybe, hopefully, it was the cyst) we arrive at the ER and they take me back right away. The nurse brings in a suction thing and I already know.

I ask DH for the baggie, and I can see the baby, size of a blueberry, I can see the eyes, the stumps where legs and arms should be, the spine forming, everything. Then the doctor came in trying to do a pelvic exam and I broke down as he put the suction inside me.

All I could hear was everyone telling me to calm down, relax. And then it was over.

Re: Never thought it would happen to me

  • I'm so sorry you have gone through all of this and hope you can find support from all the ladies on here. It's so hard to hear all the doctor's saying everything is fine, just relax, for it to end up like this. I too miscarried naturally and although it was so so hard to see the baby (ours was 9 weeks) now that I am a few days out I feel a sense of peace knowing I got to see and hold him/her. Take the time to grieve as you need to, it's a very emotional process. Thoughts and prayers with you. 

  • I am so sorry for your loss. What a horrible experience. I had some spotting 2 weeks ago Monday and went to the ER where they told me everything looked fine but after several tests, it was discovered that I had a blighted ovum. I had a D&C on Wednesday after a week and a half of the whole "wait and see" game. Honestly, that was the hardest part of the whole experience. The good news is that now you can start to heal emotionally and physically. Its hard and some days are much worse than others. I'm praying for you and all the amazing women on this board.
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  • Thank you, I'm trying hard to stay positive, it is downright hard. I am sorry for your losses as well. And I'm sure I will find great support here.
  • I'm so sorry for your loss! It's a rough thing to go through. Make sure you give yourself time to grieve and heal. How long that takes or what the process looks like is different for everyone. I can tell you that it does get easier with time and you are able to move forward. All the best!!
    TTC: Since July 2013
    BFP #1: EDD 05/27/2014 (D&C 10/17/2014)
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