October 2013 Moms

Lonely. ...

Anyone else feel like all their friends have disappeared? I haven't been out with any friends since months before I even had Broderick. Now I'm home all day with 2 under 2 and I never get a break.
I asked a few friends if they wanted to go have drinks tonight and got the I'm busy or ignored one friend even asked me if I was too tired to go out! Hell yes I'm too tired to out, but I need it. Seems the only people that want to hang with me is my mother in law and my dad.
I also just had my 6 week appointment got the all clear to do all things physical again and got my birth control. She didn't ask me how I was feeling though and to be honest I'm starting to feel depressed. Don't know if it's just I need to get out or because she was picking at my weight again or the fact that my Brody cries nonstop from tummy issues or what. Oh an Hubby won't even look at or touch me.

OK whine over....
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Re: Lonely. ...

  • I'm so sorry you are feeling like this. I am so busy with my one LO, I can't imagine how hard it is to keep up with two.
    I think if you are starting to feel depressed, then you really need to talk with someone who is a professional about it. Its better to talk about it and figure things out now then allow them to get worse until you get to a point where you are seriously down.
    I'm sorry about your husband, its a transition for them too, and maybe he is going through some things as well. Hopefully things get better in that department too, and I would suggest just being direct with him to see what's up.
    as far as your first question, yes, I have lost some friends too and rarely go out anymore. But the good friends will stick around and come see your babies, and you will make more mom friends that understand your life.
    remember how precious your babies are, and remind yourself that they are the ones that need you right now, and love on them as much as possible, and whenever you can get a babysitter, try to get a night out - sounds like you need it. Hang in there! We all make sacrifices for our children, because they are worth it.
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  • I'm sorry, I have days that I totally feel this way! LO is screaming, DH doesn't get it and I'm too tired to do anything. Usually a great day pops up after a bad one but definitely talk to someone about it. My midwife clinic has every women come in for a 2 week post partum appt and the whole appt was screening for and talking about post partum depression because it's so common and so often overlooked! Hugs!
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  • Lhand11Lhand11 member
    edited November 2013
    I'm a sahm of 2 under 2 as well. I'm pretty much a home body, but I got so used to getting out almost everyday with DS during the summer I'm starting to get cabin fever. The nights getting dark sooner doesn't help. There is no harm in calling your ob now and telling her how you feel.

    I think what you are feeling is normal as you try and get a new routine, but that sucks about your friends and your hubby. Have you tried initiating with your hubby? And what about hosting something with your friends?

    Eta: god I hope this makes sense... I'm half asleep..
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  • I'm totally right there with you, I feel like DH gets to get out and be social, I'm stuck at home. My friends don't call me at all, txt nothing. I don't know anyone else around here, and I'm 2000 miles from my mother. LO is having a bad couple of days and I feel like a crap mom. Clearly DH doesn't understand me and I don't understand him. Hoping things get better for you too, I'm on the verge of losing it.
  • I am totally there with you on the friend thing. Most of my friends don't have kids so the fact that I am now a mommy and cannot party it up at the moment has somehow made them all defect on me. I called my BFF yesterday and her excuse for not calling anymore (we used to talk everyday) is that she figures I'm busy with baby. Lame sauce.

    I am pretty darn good at being a lone wolf but I never thought I would have to reappraise the strength of my friendships just because I started a family when most of them swear to never have kids.

    I am very thankful for my family that keeps in constant touch with me and for the few mom friends that I have.

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  • You and me, same boat.


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