Celebrating your parent's anniversary

LaurelBee · November 2013

Do you celebrate your parent's/IL's anniversary? Not just acknowledge it with a card, but actually get together and celebrate? Do you buy them a gift?

Nechie122 · November 2013

I don't but I should because my mom gets so insulted. But DH compares it to Valentine's Day -- you know, it's a day for the couple. Of course, our parents still send gifts for our anniversary so DH may or may not be wrong about this.

klondikebar · November 2013

I just mail a card. I always feel like I should give my dad a gift as a reward for putting up with my mom for so long.

edit: This year, my dad told me he could believe they had been married for xx years and all I could think was, "I'm so sorry." I'm such an asshole.

Vol4life · November 2013

I should acknowledge mine since it will be 25 years next week. However they are both on my shit list right now and have had assholish tendencies recently so I dunno. But as a general rule no I don't. I used to tell my grandparents happy anniversary when I remembered and had a came made for their 50th.

ArmyWife114 · November 2013

We send a card to both sets of parents. I see it a lot like Valentine's Day, it's really for the couple, but do acknowledge them. Sometimes we call, provided we remember.

theimpossibleastronaut · November 2013

I organized a party for my parents' 30th and we had a dinner at our house for DH's parents 40th.

LaurelBee · November 2013

We (Dh, me, and my 2 Sils) took their parents out to eat for their 40th anni last year. It cost over $150 for the meal Bc they picked an expensive restaurant. This year Sil is trying to get everyone together again. Dh suggested a cheaper place and Sil poor shamed him for being a cheapskate. Dh says we have to go anyway Bc it's for his parents. I say fuck it, we can invite my ILs over for dinner instead. I am also wondering why we have to celebrate their 41st anniversary in the 1st place.

theimpossibleastronaut · November 2013

@laurelbee your SIL sucks for doing that. I agree with you. Have them over for a nice dinner and let SIL take them to the expensive restaurant.

sandyapples · November 2013

Sometimes I remember to call.

studyinpink · November 2013

We send a card.

FrickandFrack · November 2013

With my parents we just call but we are usually at the beach for in-laws so we all go to dinner.

s0ulchicken · November 2013

Usually just a phone call, although this year was a special year, so we made them a photo book on shutter fly.

LaurelBee · November 2013

So you guys, Sil just sent a long text to both of us saying Dh "disrespected" his parents bc he suggested Fuddruckers for lunch. Blah blah blah, she is "disappointed and sad." I wrote back that we would celebrate with Mil/Fil in our own time so Sil's plans wouldn't be limited and we were sorry to miss out. Sil returned a huge text to Dh (not both of us) ranting about holidays we've missed and presents my ILs have purchased for us and how ungrateful we are bc we don't reciprocate. Then Sil#2 called Dh to chew him out for being selfish and told him to suck it up for mom and dad.

WTF is going on? Am I being punked? I'm so confused why this has become such a huge deal. Now I want Fuddruckers.

theimpossibleastronaut · November 2013

@laurelbee for their 41st anniversary? Why is this special? Your reply was just fine. Your SILs need to chill the fuck out and do what they want and let you do the same. Sorry they are being assholes about this.

ShakeyJakey · November 2013

Gifts are given without expectation of reciprocation. At least they should be. Don't give in or it will only be harder to say no next time! I'm sure you ILs don't really care that mch anyway.

We don't celebrate either of our parents FWIW. My dad passed away years ago anyway but I think we would only celebrate big ones, 40 years, 50 years etc. We had a huge one for my grandparents' 50th because they never had a wedding. If they both make it to 65 in two years I want to do a big thing again. (They're 82 and 86.)

MamatoA2010 · November 2013

I don't celebrate my parents anniversary, just a simple happy anniversary card. And I don't have an H or SO so can't answer that question regarding IL's, but when I did, I would just wish them a simple happy anniversary.

LaurelBee · November 2013

@riversong82 Thanks

There is apparently a lot repressed feelings coming out today. I'm just backing out of the drama. I just can't deal with crazy...

jak554 · November 2013

Just a phone call for both sets. My parent's 30th is next year and I would love to do a special party but we'll see.

klondikebar · November 2013

@LaurelBee Sorry your SILs are giving you a hard time. They are being ridiculous.

You'd actually be putting more effort and thought into inviting them to your home for dinner than SIL taking them to a restaurant. You should text them and ask why they can't be bothered to make a special meal for their own parents. Just kidding. DON'T DO THAT!

missyishere · November 2013

I could celebrate my parents' date of being unmarried for 30 years next year?

chardonnay24 · November 2013

We get them a card and a gift, but we don't celebrate. I feel like anniversaries are things that should be celebrated by just the couple? I don't know, it seems weird to have a big party for something like that.

pandaglitter · November 2013

I send my dad a text or call since my stepmom doesn't "approve of my life choices" of getting married and having a family and ignores me when I try to call or text or email her. (They live 5 hours away). I don't think my husband even knows his dads anniversary, but it just happened and I told his stepmom congrats and his dad's mom was dying so he was focused on that so it was just quiet this year. It was also 11 years. As we didn't do anything for our anniversary, I don't see myself needing to celebrate other people's, but I'll definitely congratulate them on another year.