13 Things You Should NEVER Say to a Working Mother!

SoMoNY · November 2013

Amazing that this even needs to be said. I love the responses

https://proudworkingmom.com/top-things-never-say-working-mom/

82Sonia · November 2013

My MIL has said many of these things to me. I don't think she realizes that she's being offensive.

daisy662 · November 2013

I can relate to the husband comment...My husband has several advanced degrees and has a great job in a field that is considered well paying. People often assumed that I would be a sahm after my son was born and now that we are expecting #2, more people are asking me. Little do they know that Although my industry/company/etc is not as "glamorous", I actually make near 3 times what he does so financially it just makes more sense for me to keep working. People need to shut up and mind their own business!

financialdiva · November 2013

I get the Wow you are so organized one all the time.

And I am always one parent teacher conference away from a meltdown.

Nechie122 · November 2013

I actually haven't gotten any of these comments about working per se, but I do sometimes get weird comments about sending DD to daycare, like it's a dirty word.

SLGILL1978 · November 2013

No one has ever said a negative thing to me online or in real life. Actually my boss and some other co workers were deathly afraid I was going to tell them I wasn't coming back after my daughter was born. I think my boss called/texted/emailed me at least 1-2 times a weeks after I gave birth until I returned.
I will say sometimes when people ask you where do you send your daughter to daycare, I may get weird looks or comments because it's always followed by where does your babysitter live?

dglvrk2 · November 2013

I've gotten a few of these too including the husband comment and the ones about missing kids too much.

However, I've been a WM for over two years and the negative comments are very few and far between.

I found this under the related articles on the website:

https://proudworkingmom.com/top-reasons-i-am-proud-to-be-a-working-mother/

This is more like my experience :-)

FemShep · November 2013

Heehee. Back when exH and I were still married, and DD1 was around 9mo, ex was telling his mom about a conference he was speaking at. She was gushing about how successful he was, and, trying to be nice, he pointed out that I was also speaking at a conference about a week later. She then turned to me and said, "Aren't you afraid DD1 won't know you when you get back?"

This was the same lady who, out of the blue, asked me how DD1's diaper rash was. "What diaper rash?," I asked. "Well, I assumed she had one, since I'm sure she doesn't get changed often enough at daycare." (Daycare changed her every two hours at a minimum, or whenever they noticed a soiled diaper. Frankly, they changed her more than I did.)

You can imagine how much I don't miss those family gatherings!

skibunny59 · November 2013

When I first went back to work it was super hard and I often would talk to some of the teacher's aides at my school how hard it was to leave DD. These are older women who have grown children. Most of them were SAHM and are now working now that their kids are older. Anyway, a lot of them said to me "Oh I couldn't leave them." or " I don't know how you do it. I could never work and leave my kids"

I kept my mouth shut but I wanted to tell them "If you HAD to do it, then you would."

itsmevkb · November 2013

Since my husband does most of the school drop-offs and pick-ups and since he also has a far more flexible schedule than I do he has done things like read to the class and attended family lunch, etc. The couple of times I've shown up to these events I've heard comments such as "oh, so they do have a mother." wtf?

NicoleWI · November 2013

The organized one cracks me up. I have gotten that, and I am totally disorganized and feel like I am living in total chaos.

I'm becoming a SAHM sometime in spring, though, and I know that will come with its own awkward list of comments from people. It's going to be interesting to see it from both sides.

VOR · November 2013

I consider myself lucky - by and large, I haven't dealt w/ most of these comments.

Depending "who" they were coming from, though, would determine how annoyed I'd be. I look at people who say this stuff seriously as being insecure in their own choices so they try to put other people's choices down in order to bolster themselves.

Whatever. We do what works for our family. I REALLY don't care if people judge me for working.

kristennd · November 2013

I haven't encountered them yet either.

People get distracted by my husband's SAHD status and make their comments in that direction instead...

sdlaura · November 2013

I haven't gotten a ton of these comments, either, but 80% of the people (outside of my job) who have heard that I'm expecting baby #2 have asked me whether I'm going to scale back at work. It really annoys me that my husband doesn't get the same question.

SunAndRain · November 2013

I have received very few comments like that but then, I'm not around many SAHMs. Anyway, I'm sort of a point in my life where I no longer care to hold back my remarks. If they share their opinion why shouldn't I share mine?

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