How did you meet?

YBnormal85 · November 2013

Just because I'm curious...how did you meet your significant other? I always love to hear others peoples stories

YBnormal85 · November 2013

Here is our story...L and I met on a dating site called Okcupid. We were just looking for friends and both of our profiles stated that. We were friends for months and always enjoyed the time we spent together whether it was bowling, coffee dates, dinner, and the like. She was seeing a girl at the time, as was I but neither was official or serious. I was just out of a 5 year relationship, and she was just out of a 7 year relationship so something that wasn't serious was what we each needed. When L went to Europe the week before her 30th bday I had coffee w the girl she was seeing.L wanted us to chat bc I had just started my dreadlocks and her "friend" had them also.anyways during that coffee date the girl mentioned she had been seeing someone and hooked up w her since Linda was away. My heart sank.I wanted to punch this girl I barely knew for doing something that would ultimately hurt linda. After linda returned I realized that girl never told her what was going on which really upset me. I sent that girl a message and told her she needed to be fair to linda and tell her but she never did after about a week. During that time I started to question why I was so so upset about this situation. I called linda and told her she needed to have a talk w T and thats where everything began.finally then girl came clean and about a week later I realized i had feelings for Linda, more than friendship feelings lol. I mentioned on the phone we should just date bc I was bound to be less drama than T was and I thought we would be really good together. And then a few days later, after a discussion about us not wanting to run our friendship we decided we should take that step anyways...and I'm so glad we did! Now we have been married for over a year with a little peanut on the way and I have never been happier. We often joke that our entire friendship was practically dating without any physical component. We never tried to impress each other, we were ourselves from day one...it was the best way to begin our relationship

ATXmommas · November 2013

Z and I were introduced 6 years ago this month. My good friend started dating someone and after about a month we arranged to meet for lunch so that i could meet the new GF. When I show up for lunch, besides my friend and her new GF, Z was also there. As it turns out, Z and my friend's new GF had dated briefly in the past and had remained friends. Z knew she was coming to lunch to meet me, but they hadn't filled me in.

From there, we started hanging out - neither of us thought a whole lot about each other at first, then Z started falling for me. It took me a little longer. I told Z for a long time that I didn't want a serious relationship and that I didn't see us together long-term…. until one day I realized that I had fallen in love with her. I've said these words before (which were incorporated into our wedding ceremony) - "I didn't know what I wanted until what I wanted showed up."

The couple who introduced us are still together and are two of our dearest, closest friends.

YBnormal85 · November 2013

@ATX aww I love that story! It's crazy how sometimes what you want is right in front of you and then all of a sudden you realize it..and there's no turning back

,

YBnormal85 · November 2013

@wallace that is too sweet! Congrats on 15 years, so awesome

KH826 · November 2013

J and I met in college. We were in the same sociology class (Spring of my sophomore year, and her junior year). I always showed up to class early (for every class - like really early - I don't know why...). On the first night of class, I walked into the classroom 25 minutes early, fully expecting the room to be completely empty and there J was sitting at a desk with her notebook out ready to get started. We made eye contact and quickly said hello and then never spoke to one another again all semester. Our professor always encouraged discussion, so we put the desks in a circle at our first class and they stayed that way all semester. J's seat was directly across the circle from mine. I would often look up and she would be looking at me. It made me uncomfortable, and I didn't know who she was. I was always very outspoken in class, and she rarely ever said a word. I asked a friend of mine about her and he told me who she was and that she was the captain of the tennis team and that she had just come out earlier that year. Interesting.

Well the semester ended and we each went our separate ways for the summer still having never spoken to one another. When we came back in the Fall (my junior year, her senior year) she suddenly started coming to Pride meetings (I was the president of our college's Pride organization that year). I saw her in the back of the room week after week starting in September, but she never said a word. Well, one night in late September she went out to a gay bar with a group of people, one of which was the friend I mentioned above who I had asked about her the year before. Well, she apparently knew that this person was a good friend of mine, and they had both been drinking and were hanging out at the bar and my friend made a comment about fixing J up wilth a cute girl at the bar. J said to my friend that she already had her eye on someone else. My friend asked who, and J said my name. My friend almost spit out his drink (apparently, I wasn't there!). He came back to campus totally plastered and came knocking on my dorm room door at 2am to tell me that J "liked me" and that he thought I should do something about it. HA!

I thought the whole thing was crazy, and I at first had zero interest. I had been burned pretty badly by another relationship a good year before, but it left me bitter and not wanting to be hurt again. I also had decided that I wanted to move back to Boston after college, so I didn't want to get involved with anyone from PA who had strong ties to PA.

Well, long story short (which at this point, I know I haven't made this short!), J and I started IMing on AIM (ha - remember that?) and then we started emailing. Within about a week, we knew sooooo much about each other and had shared pretty much every thought in our heads with each other. My resistance was fading at this point. Well, it was a Monday night in early October 2004 and it was the first presidential debate between George W Bush and John Kerry. I remarked on AIM that I was about to watch it and was very interested in it... J said that her roommate was watching something stupid and she couldn't watch it and she was bummed. Without thinking I said "you can come watch it in my room..." 20 mins later she was at my door with my favorite kind of ice cream (which I had told her about in one of our many conversations). We sat on the floor and watched the debate in my room eating Reese's peanut butter cup ice cream. It was the first time we had hung out 1:1 ever. Well, after the debate she stayed and we literally stayed up all night talking. She left at 7am and I went and showered and started my day having not slept a wink, but not minding. The rest is sort of history... things moved fast from there and when she graduated in May, I moved off campus for my Senior year and we got an apartment together.

Fast forward 8 years, and on our wedding day, the professor who taught the sociology class that we met in was our wedding officiant. She and her partner have been together for 25 years, and have a 10 yr old son. J used to babysit their son when he was little and I would go hang out there with her. They were the first lesbian family that I ever knew, and I thought they were amazing. Still do. We just called that professor last night to tell her that we are expecting. She cried and said she will be the best "Auntie" ever.

So, that's our story. I pretty much love it. So I will take any opportunity to tell it

YBnormal85 · November 2013

@KH Thats so cute how she had her eye on you for quite a while! And I love that she brought you your fav ice cream.Adorable

KH826 · November 2013

YBnormal85 said:

@KH Thats so cute how she had her eye on you for quite a while! And I love that she brought you your fav ice cream.Adorable

Thanks! And as you all know, our dog's name is Reese. Not a coincidence ;-)

mwagner25 · November 2013

Awh, so many cute stories. Our is truly typical small gay community, lesbian story so we don't often tell it. We always tell people we met through mutual friends. But... the truth is that we dated the same girl. The girl was my ex when L started dating her. When my ex heard that L and I had met and hung out with some mutual friends she forbid L from hanging out with me again. Well once they broke up L started calling me. I was adamant that I was not going to date her since she had just broken up with an ex of mine, but she was persistent and 6 years later we are still going strong.

YBnormal85 · November 2013

@mwagner good thing she was persistent

trisholio · November 2013

My wife and I met at work. We both started at the same company at the same time. We were in training together for 3 months. I was very intrigued by her from the first day and I would try and find a reason to talk to her during our breaks and lunch. Once day my wife asked if anyone wanted to go shopping with her because this was her first job having to wear dress clothes, I volunteered right away! I wasn't going to pass up shopping with a cute girl and spending HER money! We kept coming up with reasons to be together outside of work. I am not a morning person, but I would get up extra early and get us coffee and we would spend time in the parking lot before work. This went on for a few months. In typical lesbian style we moved in together after just a few months of dating. She was the first girl that I dated, so I came out to my family while we were still dating (actually this time of year, it was a week before Thanksgiving) We got engaged a year later and then married a year after that. We just celebrated our 2 year wedding anniversary and being together for almost 4 years, yet it feels like we have always been together.

YBnormal85 · November 2013

@trisholio Any girl who can make a non morning person want to get up extra early for a coffee run must be a keeper

We often say the same thing...it feels like we have always been together! It has only been three years for us, but it sure feels like a lot longer.Its hard to remember my pre-Linda life lol.

karah0011 · November 2013

One word...MYSPACE!

)

doodah1013 · November 2013

A and I had a scandalous start to our relationship... Yipes!
We actually had known each other for 3 years.... AND she was my boss... AND I was dating someone else and that person worked with us too... AND A had never dated anyone who was bio-female.
We worked very closely together at camp and then we became friends... Then I noticed I liked the way she made me laugh... Then we became very good friends. Then I noticed how she really listened to my fears about the world and was so compassionate and caring. Then one day we started holding hands... And then I met her family and they embraced me as one of their own (in a way that no other family has ever done.) And then we went took the biggest chance of our lives (thus far) and risked everything to be together.
Now we are married, and I find something new to love about her everyday!

YBnormal85 · November 2013

@Karah MySpace ahh I nearly forgot about that site lol

YBnormal85 · November 2013

@doodah scandalous perhaps,but wonderful

StacyLH24 · November 2013

Our story is a little...different I suppose. At the time C and I started talking, I was in the most unhealthy relationship I have ever been in. My boyfriend at that time expressed interest in having a threesome. Up to that point, I had questioned my sexuality and had even acknowledged that I was probably more interested in women than men, but still had not really fully embraced or explored how I felt. At the time when he asked, I was all for it. The only lesbian he knew around where we live was C. He asked if she would be interested and she said maybe, but that she wanted to talk to me first, etc. So, she friended me on FB and we started talking. My boyfriend at that time, who was an alcoholic and drug addict (social workers can save anyone, right???), became instantly angry that we were talking.

C and I talked on and off for a few months. We arranged to meet up and hang out but I ended up cancelling at the last minute. I was still with my boyfriend and the night before, he got angry and punched a hole in my bedroom wall. That was the end of the relationship thankfully.

I went on to have another boyfriend briefly and still talked to C on and off. We finally met in person almost a year after we had started talking. She was on a pool league at that time, and I went to watch her play. It was a Tuesday night. February 15, 2011 to be exact. We have been inseparable since. I knew that night that she was the one. That night, she walked one way to her car and I to mine. Before I could get my door open, she had already texted me and told me she liked me. Just like most others, in typical lesbian fashion, she moved in pretty quickly.

I had never dated a woman before, nor was I out to anyone when I started dating her. My dad knew C for years and wasn't happy that I had chosen her of all women. Now, my parents absolutely love her.

YBnormal85 · November 2013

@StacyLH24 It sure seems like sometimes those really horrible relationships are so important in the grand scheme of things...good thing for that crappy guy who unknowingly lead you to your love

lamaitresse · November 2013

Smurf & I were introduced through a mutual friend, Ray. A group of us (mostly straight) were out for dinner and I had never met Smurf before. At first, I actually thought she was Ray's new girlfriend! But after somehow managing to have a conversation about fanfiction borne of lesbian subtext in Rizzoli & Isles, I quickly realized she was in no way interested in Ray!! LOL

After dinner, Smurf had plans to meet up with some other friends at the local gay bar and invited us along. I'll never turn down an offer for dancing and I was pleasantly surprised that my straight friends agreed to come, too. (They'd never been to a gay bar before). Anyway, Smurf liquored me up pretty good and we got very friendly on the dancefloor.

A couple days later I creeped her on Facebook and sent her a friend request. I was new to London anyway and didn't have many gay friends here yet, so I hoped to at least make a new friend. We already new we were a few years apart, but this was when we discovered the 14 year age gap. It quite literally freaked the crap out of her and she backed off for a while.

But I was persistent. We ended up chatting on MSN until the wee hours of the morning, several nights in a row. Eventually she asked me if I would like to go out for dinner at a particularly expensive restaurant. Excited that I'd been asked on a date, I immediately said yes. We had an amazing time, and have been pretty much inseparable since.

Apparently -- and I didn't learn this until about a year ago -- Smurf did not know we were on a date!! Even though she asked me out, helped me in and out of my coat, got all the doors, pulled out my chair, PAID FOR EVERYTHING, etc. etc. Here I thought I was being romanced, but Smurf was just being herself.

Well, whatever you call that night, it was the start of the best thing that's ever happened to me.

redrockmama · November 2013

Such cute stories everyone. I'll try to keep mine as short as I can.

J and I met at Pride 5 years ago. It was the annual "white party" at one of the lesbian bars in town. I was dating someone else, not very seriously, and J also had a girlfriend, long-term but it was far from good. I went to the party with a friend of mine, Ang who was also friends with J. Ang introduced us and I thought J was the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. She thought I was a hard ass in a short skirt.

A couple of weeks later Ang and I were hanging out. It was the weirdest night. My gf and I broke up, then Ang and her gf broke up. J called and asked if she could hang out with us. She had been in town for a Peace Corps interview and didn't want to drive home because she had just found out her gf had been cheating on her for a long time and then suddenly moved out of the state. She just didn't want to go home. So we all headed to the same bar and were sad together, but J and I talked a lot and really connected. I knew she was someone I wanted to get to know.

Fast forward a couple more weeks, J asked me to come to the bar that weekend. I was going to a concert with another friend, but said I would try to come after, which I did. She thought my friend and I were dating and she was off being a newly single woman, so we didn't talk much. At the end of the night I went to say good-bye and we danced for the first time and both felt fireworks. I asked Ang for J's number and J asked Ang for my number at the same time. We immediately started texting and talking on the phone.

We went camping a couple weeks later and stayed up all night freezing and almost cuddling. We both wanted to kiss each other but were too shy. The next day we were lying by the lake and I asked if she wanted to play the game where you write on the the persons back and they have to guess what you wrote. We did this back and forth for a bit and then I wrote, "I want to kiss you" and she said do it then. So, I did and it was amazing. We've basically been together ever since.

Wow that was a long story. The funny thing is those three times at the bar are like the only times we've been to the bar. We are soooo not bar people so it's weird that it's where we met and our relationship started.

AandStilltrying · November 2013

Oh my....I too have a scandalous story. Sarah was with her long time partner of 7 years but was very unhappy as her now X had cheated on her 5 times (I know).

Sarah was actually my sorority sister (big sis at that). We became bff's in college and she lived off campus. I spent a ton of time at her house. One day we were playing with her dogs and she started tickling me and then was on top of me. I freaked cause she paused and it was as though as we looked into each other's eyes we connected and I thought she was going to kiss me. I freaked and pushed her off of me actually knocking her onto the floor.

About a month later she told me she loved me (and little did she believe I did too as I had never been with a girl). On New Year's Eve she well...yeah...converted me I guess. Lol

From that day forward we couldn't stay away no matter how hard we tried. It took about a year for her to really leave her X. It was an emotional roller coaster. I moved to NC because it hurt to only have her part time and share her. That pushed her to make her choice. 8 years later here we are in NC, married with jobs, house, pets and hopefully soon some LO's.

newmompeanut · November 2013

I'm joining the scandalous team... I don't normally tell this story to many people, because honestly I feel terrible about what I did and hate that I could ever be that terrible of a person to people that I love. So please don't judge me too harshly.

I was married to R (a man) for just shy of a year and had been with him for about 5 years. He was a great guy and a very good husband, but it felt like we were just best friends that were roommates (we had many talks about this for years, and even before we got married which should have been a good reason to not get married).

On May 9th, I met B for the first time when I went to bingo with her sister and my best friend. I work with her brother and her sister and for the past 3 years at work they had been calling me their little sister because they said B and I were so much alike. The first night I met her I honestly didn't really even like her because I thought she was kind of a jerk and I was very offended that both her brother and sister thought I acted like her. I later found out that she had just been dumped by the girl that she thought was "the one" and was just having a rough night because her ex was playing games about whether she wanted to be with her or not.

On May 12th, I went on my delayed honeymoon which is when R and I had planned on trying to start having kids. We ended up not trying on the honeymoon at all - thus the feeling of just friends!

On May 23rd, I came back for another game of bingo and B's attitude had completely changed. She has this infectious personality that I just loved being around. We flirted and ended up kissing that night (after quite a few drinks, which is weird since neither of us are big drinkers).

I ended up telling R the whole story the next night about B and all that. I don't know how it all happened but R and I ended up "working it all out" and N was conceived.

I kept hanging out with B since I honestly couldn't stand to be away from her, but just as a friend. Although there were feelings growing we didn't do anything to pursue each other. Then two weeks later, literally two minutes before I was walking out to go to bingo with B I took a test and found out I was pregnant.

Over the next 4 months it was a complete rollercoaster for everyone; between me going back and forth from my marriage to B and B's ex wanting her back and B going back to her to being pregnant. Also, B had no intention of having a child at this age (I'm 25 and she's 27 now) and told me that she couldn't be with me because that's not what she wanted for herself.

R and I finally agreed that the best thing was to separate. B and I became official November 23 and I ended up moving into my own place in December. By the end of the month B had moved in.

Pinkspark · November 2013

DW and I were friends in high school, and began dating my junior year.. we've been together for just about 15 years now.. yikes that's a long time! I feel old now!!

shelly2314 · November 2013

We meet like any good lesbian story should start...at the softball field LOL. We were both in long-term relationships and were playing softball. We would hang out with everyone and became friends. Her relationship ended (after 12 yrs) and she was interested in a mutual friend. I was going through issues with my gf of 10 yrs at this time and M and I started hanging out and became great friends. Then my gf at the time and I broke up and we become closer. One thing led to another....now we have been married for a year and a half and are starting a family!

shelly2314 · November 2013

It sure seems like sometimes those really horrible relationships are so important in the grand scheme of things...good thing for that crappy guy who unknowingly lead you to your love

YBnormal85 and @StacyLH24..I couldn't agree more. I was in a toxic relationship when I met M. She saved me, from myself and the hell I had allowed myself to live in for several years. It has been a process for me to learn how to accept love and myself, but M was very patient. And now, b/c of the toxicity I experienced, I can truly appreciate the love that we have!

ball.and.chain · November 2013

Oh, ours is pretty boring. We met online. After emailing for a few weeks, we met at a coffeeshop one Sunday. Then she invited me to a dinner party she was throwing. I felt totally weird going, but she was a professional chef at the time and I was obsessed with food so I couldn't pass up the opportunity. I had fun and I liked her friends, but she felt like more friend material than girlfriend material. Apparently she didn't agree. She kept taking me out to fancy restaurants, she made me braised rabbit when she found out how much I love it, and eventually, as she says, she "wore me down." We moved in together about 6 months after we met, got engaged a little over a year after we met, and got married in 2007.

GoaliesWife123 · November 2013

Love this thread! DW and I knew each other in high school. She was a senior and I was a freshmen and we were both band nerds. (Band geek for life!) We were friends, I looked up to her, but she then graduated and we lost touch.

Many years later, we connected on facebook. I was in a bad relationship that was spiraling into nowhere and she was in a bad relationship as well. We rekindled our friendship and became very close. I ended my relationship after my ex physically assaulted me and DW was there as a best friend to help me move out. DW's partner at the time was jealous of our friendship, and in order to give her relationship 100%, she and I stopped talking for about 3 months. I studied for the bar exam and dated someone. She and I only talked every once in a while. After about 3 months I discovered that DW ended her relationship after finding out that her partner cheated on her. So sad, considering she put our friendship on hold to make sure she gave her partner 100%!!

We started to date, casually, and then became more serious. I was madly in love with her from the start, so dating was wonderful. We dated for 6 months or so before she asked me to marry her and we are living happily ever after. She is my best friend, my soulmate and the best thing that could have ever happened to me

doodah1013 · November 2013

@herbabymama Have you sold the movie rights to your love story yet? I would totally see that!

YBnormal85 · November 2013

Ahh I'm just loving all these stories! Thanks so much for sharing

lamaitresse · November 2013

@herbabymama - OMG how is there NOT a movie about your story yet?! That is just beautiful. I have tears.

Jazibel · November 2013

EV and I met 18 years ago as freshman at a small women's college in NY State, she was 17 I was 18.
We were polar opposites in a way, she was more punk rock and I was preppy. But we met and hung out through mutual friends at various on campus parties. EV was out and I was just coming out at the time. We had a few encounters while playing various games (spin the bottle, etc.) Yes - it was that way. Anyway sophomore year we ended up hanging out in an abandoned dorm room together smoking cigarettes and talking. I was staring into her eyes and had the most incredible "spiritual" experience. In that instance I recognized that I "knew her soul" and had for an eternity both backwards and forwards. From that point on I never doubted that she was the person for me. We had a scandalous start to our relationship as we were both in the process of ending other relationships, so we started seeing each other secretly (blushes).

Everything blew up tragically due to various circumstances at the end of the year, just a few months after we'd been seeing each other (and I had seriously been the happiest ever). She and I parted ways. We didn't talk for about a year. But I never stopped thinking about her. A year later when I went to study abroad we talked briefly on the phone before I left - she had called a mutual friend. I had other relationships and encounters and even went so far to confess to two partners (one male, one female) that I couldn't love them ever because my heart belonged to EV.

Fast forward to 1999 we started writing letters and talking on the phone ocassionally she'd moved out to California. She came back East to visit our mutual friends and myself and we all hung out for a magical weekend where I barely slept. We've been together ever since.

I moved out to CA in March of 2000 and we moved into a tiny apartment together. We were 22 and 23 at the time. We got married 4 years later. We're coming up on 10 years this July. EV commented the other day that she's known me longer than not. It's amazing to grow up together. She is my best friend, and the person I love doing things with the most. Basically my favorite person in the world. I feel blessed that we have a family together, and that through good times and bad we've made it this far.

2MamazInSeattle · November 2013

Short version: We met online.

Longer Version:
I "winked" at J on match dot com while my sister and I were in the hospital waiting room as our mom was having brain surgery over Labor Day weekend that year. We had wifi and were both trying to distract ourselves from what was going on. I'd noticed J's profile, but she is not photogenic, and honestly all the pictures of her looked like different people! I was like "will the real one please stand up..."

She replied to my wink and we wrote back and forth - very lethargically - for about 6 weeks. Then, we inadvertently met! I was going to a gay writing institute at the time, and we had an annual event that was 2 nights of performances. You performed one night, and volunteered the other. On the 2nd night, I was taking tickets and she came through my line. She found me at intermission, and I told her to find me on Myspace (yes, myspace). We wrote back and forth there while she was visiting her family in Arkansas over the following two weeks...then finally...

We had our first date. We talk about it now and call it a "Not a No" date -which at the time was exciting for both of us. We went to MOHAI for a photography exhibit and then to a nearby pub and she had chicken ceasar with a Makers Mark, neat. I thought that was badass. I had nachos and really bad red wine. It was a Saturday. Date #2 wasn't until the following Friday - we went to a place called Baguette Box and she ordered wine for us at lunch - later she said "it just relaxes things" which was true - and then we saw a movie. Now, at both lunch and in the movie we got excited about a song that played (Arcade Fire at lunch, Spoon in the movie) - and I was so excited - someone who liked music! Our Myspace profiles had the same band listed first and we both had like 50 listed - this was our first hint that there was a connection.

Date #3, we had a nighttime 'sexy date' and went to eat at a little place nearby. Then we came back to my place - and J, who is admittedly not smooth at all - looks at the clock and says "Um, I was kinda hoping we could make out. I have to work in the morning and it's getting late." I'd never had anyone be so bold! So what else could I say but, "Ok!"

She texted me a quote from the Arcade Fire song we'd heard on date #2 "Then I'll dig a tunnel from my window to yours" and I realized she really liked me. And I melted a little and knew I really liked her too. I'm guessing she'd had some drinks as she is shy and not gutsy/romantic really - but it was so sweet and we both refer to that text to this day!

Over the next few weeks we started seeing each other almost daily, and then I got snowed in at her house for 3 or 4 days in December which totally accelerated things between us. It was a happy accident for sure.We both admit it was not love at first sight, but we really grew on each other and one day were just like "yep, I'm in this!" to each other. She moved in after a year - we didn't want to be U-haul lesbians especially at our age/after each having had 2 other significant relationships. So we were careful, but knew where it was headed. She moved in a the 1-year mark and now we just passed 7 years together

So that is it! Funny aside - the amazing Seattle alternative rock non-profit radio station is doing a capital campaign to raise money for their new location at Seattle Center by the Space Needle (raising $15M) - so they have tiles you can buy. J said "I want to get a tile, but the $500 one only allows 28 characters." I said "That's fine - let's do it!" She said "But that's not enough characters...we need two lines of 28 which is $1000." I asked why, and she showed me her laptop where she already had it all filled out to say "Then I'll dig a tunnel from my window to yours..." So - for Christmas this year, we are getting the tile for each other!!! We are both so excited - we donate regularly anyway (music saved us as fairly isolated kids in small towns growing up) - but this felt really special and meant a lot to me that she found it/wanted to do it. She also said, "We can take our kids to see it and tell them about how we met..." Ok, so maybe she is romantic.

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