HT question: would you pierce your baby girls ears?

Medic99 · November 2013

Nope. Neither of my girls have their ears pierced. We are letting them decide when they are 12 just as my family did.

cfthoct292011 · November 2013

No because the baby has no choice in the matter. I wont even cut my childs hair until they turn around and say they want it done. My parents had mine pierced by the time i was 6 i refused to wear earrings. I got them repierced i thought i'd wear them. Well im now 27 and still hate earrings.

kali55 · November 2013

I won't. I got mine done when I was 5 years old and I remember it was a birthday present I desperately wanted. It was kind of a big deal and I look forward to doing that with my daughter (should she consider it as big a deal as I did) when she is ready

hlm184 · November 2013

Nope. I love my memory of making that choice too much to take that away.

ashcole28 · November 2013

My mom had my ears pierced when I was a baby. I'm not emotionally scared or anything I don't really see the big deal. I'll probably do the same thing with my daughter.

lcr23 · November 2013

ashcole28 said:
My mom had my ears pierced when I was a baby. I'm not emotionally scared or anything I don't really see the big deal. I'll probably do the same thing with my daughter.

Same here.

britt33 · November 2013

We will be. I have 3 sisters, and my mom took all of us as babies. In fact, I believe we were about 8weeks old. Not one of us cried. And because babies don't put germy hands on the newly pierced ears, they typically don't get infected. I don't see any problem with it.

janice9821 · November 2013

Heck no - based on my own ears being pierced at a very young age. My ears were pierced when I was really little, and when I was little it looked adorable. But once I got older and my ears and I got bigger, I noticed that the holes aren't quite in the same spot in each ear. It's probably not noticeable to anyone else that my left ear is pierced a little lower than the right, but it really bothered me when I was in my teens.

NYJodway · November 2013

I said no, but mostly because I hate earrings and don't have pierced ears myself. If she really wanted them when she got older, that would be fine, but it's not something I would seek out for her.

RedDawnsRevenge · November 2013

kbuckleyharp said:
Besides cultural reasons, I think its a sort of cool right of passage for a young girl to decide herself she wants to do this and pick out which earrings she wants. I was scared to DEATH and never got it done until I was 18. Then, I couldn't stop. I started piercing everything. LOL. I have had a few harp students (almost girls, but MORE boys are coming around, YAY!) and they are so cute when they tell me about their ear piercing experience.

When you said piercing everything it reminded me of a pt I had once. This little old man asked me if I was like a bomber plane. I laughed and told him I'd need more holes...

Bluebird2318 · November 2013

I wouldn't do it, but I don't really judge it either. I just don't think it's cute and I like the idea of it being a special thing for a child when they're a little bit older.

Not gonna touch too much on the ear piercing versus circumcision thing except to say that there are some small but conceivable medical benefits to circumcision (assuming you trust the judgment of the AAP--I personally do; your mileage may vary). There are no conceivable medical benefits to ear piercing. That's the difference to me. That being said, I still don't think any parent is a baby-hating fiend for doing either option.

There are way too damn many reasons for parents to judge other parents. A circ'd, formula fed, crib-sleeping, ear-pierced, only child baby has the same chance to grow up to be a happy, healthy, well-adjusted adult as does a non-circ'd, breastfed, co-sleeping, non-pierced baby with siblings. It's all good, y'all. Do what works best for your family.

BiggerinRealLife · November 2013

I won't do it, and I'm Indian. One more right of passage to hold over my daughter's head in exchange for chores and good behavior.

kwolslager · November 2013

maelic said:

Nope nope nope.

For one, it's a choice she'd have to make for herself. For two, never in a million years would I let my child get pierced at the mall with a gun. Unsanitary and unsafe. She'll (or he'll!) get pierced, if she wants to, when she's old enough to go to a professional piercer.

I understand why you'd be concerned but no one uses guns anymore to pierce ears, when I had mine done at age four, it was a huge electric gun that scared the crap outta me that the store just changed the needle. Now, if you go to get it done, most places like the mall or walmart, uses plastic small hand held "manual" guns that are always opened fresh out of a package right in front of you and then thrown away. It's WAY more sanitary these days than it was 15-20 years ago. They use hand sanitizer and gloves before touching you or any of the "equipment". I had DD1's ears pierced at 3 months at a Claire's in a mall... it was all done how I just described it. Same when I had DD2's done at the Walmart. And even when my child is old enough to "decide on their own", it's as simple as taking them out, and never wearing them again. Not a big deal.

Serenla · November 2013

kwolslager said:

maelic said:

Nope nope nope.

For one, it's a choice she'd have to make for herself. For two, never in a million years would I let my child get pierced at the mall with a gun. Unsanitary and unsafe. She'll (or he'll!) get pierced, if she wants to, when she's old enough to go to a professional piercer.

I understand why you'd be concerned but no one uses guns anymore to pierce ears, when I had mine done at age four, it was a huge electric gun that scared the crap outta me that the store just changed the needle. Now, if you go to get it done, most places like the mall or walmart, uses plastic small hand held "manual" guns that are always opened fresh out of a package right in front of you and then thrown away. It's WAY more sanitary these days than it was 15-20 years ago. They use hand sanitizer and gloves before touching you or any of the "equipment". I had DD1's ears pierced at 3 months at a Claire's in a mall... it was all done how I just described it. Same when I had DD2's done at the Walmart. And even when my child is old enough to "decide on their own", it's as simple as taking them out, and never wearing them again. Not a big deal.

The plastic gun used on me jammed and got stuck in my ear.

ETA And then it got infected.

ohhhmysushi · November 2013

Yes, it's actually pretty normal for Asians. My ears were pierced when I was a baby.

kwolslager · November 2013

Serenla said:

kwolslager said:

maelic said:

Nope nope nope.

For one, it's a choice she'd have to make for herself. For two, never in a million years would I let my child get pierced at the mall with a gun. Unsanitary and unsafe. She'll (or he'll!) get pierced, if she wants to, when she's old enough to go to a professional piercer.

I understand why you'd be concerned but no one uses guns anymore to pierce ears, when I had mine done at age four, it was a huge electric gun that scared the crap outta me that the store just changed the needle.
Now, if you go to get it done, most places like the mall or walmart, uses plastic small hand held "manual" guns that are always opened fresh out of a package right in front of you and then thrown away. It's WAY more sanitary these days than it was 15-20 years ago. They use hand sanitizer and gloves before touching you or any of the "equipment".
I had DD1's ears pierced at 3 months at a Claire's in a mall... it was all done how I just described it. Same when I had DD2's done at the Walmart.
And even when my child is old enough to "decide on their own", it's as simple as taking them out, and never wearing them again. Not a big deal.

The plastic gun used on me jammed and got stuck in my ear.

ETA And then it got infected.

It getting stuck and jammed wouldn't be the cause of an infection. If the person who did it did everything correctly (and if they didn't you should have definitely complained, or asked for a refund!) and you STILL got an infection, it would be because it was not properly cleaned or cared for after going home. And usually, if they say "clean it x amount of times during the day".. It should always be doubled!

KelleAlward · November 2013

I will have baby girls ears pierced. I had mine done very young, then had a second set when I was older. The second time was a memorable experience. I love the way little girl babies look with their ears pierced. I already chose a tiny pair of gold ruby earrings for her, and of course pair of April gemstone: Diamond! Daddy...matching pair for mommy and baby...?

fireflygirl12 · November 2013

I personally wouldn't do it if we had a girl, but I don't really side-eye anybody who does. I actually think they are cute, I would just prefer to wait until she is older. DH is really against it because he just thinks it adds to the pressure for a girl to focus on her looks and being pretty. I think it's a valid point. As a side note, I met a 10-month old boy at a play group that had both ears pierced and I totally thought it was a girl. It threw me off since so many people do it to distinguish their girls. I felt really bad.

Edrami · November 2013

I got mine when I was a baby but got it done with my pediatrician. So I would as long as it was with a pediatrician.

fireflygirl12 · November 2013

Edrami said:

I got mine when I was a baby but got it done with my pediatrician. So I would as long as it was with a pediatrician.

Is it normal for pediatricians to do it? I haven't heard of that here and wouldn't have thought of it.

Edrami · November 2013

fireflygirl12 said:

Edrami said:

I
Well see I'm Mexican and I live in a city right by the border so I think it's normal here. I'm guessing the pediatricians here see it more often so they got trained to do it, but I'm sure if you look into it you'll find one that does.

Teresa1896 · November 2013

I think it's cute but haven't done it to DD and won't until she's old enough to ask for it, around 8ish. I don't have pierced ears and neither does my mom. I've never missed not having pierced ears.

prettyinpink84 · November 2013

KendraColeslaw said:
It seems like a very cultural thing. I personally wouldn't do it, but only because I don't like the way it looks and I'd worry about it getting snagged somehow.

My thoughts exactly!

Tallawah13 · November 2013

Because of religious reasons my parents never pierced my ears. I made my decision to pierce my ears when I became an adult. If I ever have a daughter I will not pierce her ears until she is responsible enough to take care of it and it will be her decision.

abbeylanecb · November 2013

AprilMay9 said:
I wouldn't.... Just call me a bougie snob but I think it's trashy.

Yep. My sil is having my nieces pierced at 6m and I think is so tacky.

JessieAlbin · November 2013

thomas930 said:
My daughter can have her ears pierced when she is old enough to take care of the healing process without us having to always remind her and even then we will take her to a piercer not some place in the mall.

This. Piercings can heal terribly wrong, and the gun is an awful way to pierce. If you got your ears pierced with a gun, feel your lobe; that little knot in there? Scar tissue for days. A properly healed and performed piercing should not scar.

I feel like as a ftm I am going to have enough to make sure I keep up properly to make sure my kid is healthy and happy without adding a superficial wound to care for and make sure it heals without incident. I've hated the process of healing my own piercings, let alone try to heal piercings I can't feel!

Rrrrrachel · November 2013

I've bee told piercing with a needle is better because it removes a small tube of tissue vs a gun just shoves through? Any piercing experts who can weigh in on that?

JessieAlbin · November 2013

kwolslager said:

Serenla said:

kwolslager said:

maelic said:

Nope nope nope.

For one, it's a choice she'd have to make for herself. For two, never in a million years would I let my child get pierced at the mall with a gun. Unsanitary and unsafe. She'll (or he'll!) get pierced, if she wants to, when she's old enough to go to a professional piercer.

I understand why you'd be concerned but no one uses guns anymore to pierce ears, when I had mine done at age four, it was a huge electric gun that scared the crap outta me that the store just changed the needle.
Now, if you go to get it done, most places like the mall or walmart, uses plastic small hand held "manual" guns that are always opened fresh out of a package right in front of you and then thrown away. It's WAY more sanitary these days than it was 15-20 years ago. They use hand sanitizer and gloves before touching you or any of the "equipment".
I had DD1's ears pierced at 3 months at a Claire's in a mall... it was all done how I just described it. Same when I had DD2's done at the Walmart.
And even when my child is old enough to "decide on their own", it's as simple as taking them out, and never wearing them again. Not a big deal.

The plastic gun used on me jammed and got stuck in my ear.

ETA And then it got infected.

It getting stuck and jammed wouldn't be the cause of an infection. If the person who did it did everything correctly (and if they didn't you should have definitely complained, or asked for a refund!) and you STILL got an infection, it would be because it was not properly cleaned or cared for after going home. And usually, if they say "clean it x amount of times during the day".. It should always be doubled!

Regarding the "it should always be doubled!" comment: no. This is a common misconception that can actually do more harm than good, and works counterintuitively to how your body knows how to heal wounds. If you clean a wound excessively, you can actually increase your chances of incident in the healing process than if you clean it as directed by the professional who told you how to care for it.

JessieAlbin · November 2013

Rrrrrachel said:
I've bee told piercing with a needle is better because it removes a small tube of tissue vs a gun just shoves through? Any piercing experts who can weigh in on that?

It's a matter of how much trauma you are causing the body. Any gun that shoves through is going to cause more trauma than a sharp, clean edge on a more costly produced piercing needle. Less trauma = your body has to do less work to heal it = easier healing process.

JessieAlbin · November 2013

When comparing the gun process to a reputable, professional piercer (and do your research, a piercing studio is always going to be a better bet than a tattoo shop with a piercer who is a wannabe tattooer-a lot of shops will throw a tattoo apprentice hopeful into piercing before letting them tattoo), consider the amount of time and care put into proper training and technique. Any place where piercing is not the primary function is going to train as much as they absolutely have to, which is not very much. Any place where piercing is the main event, the piercer is looking at this one function as the focus of their career: they soak up tons of training and information on the best, cleanest, and easiest to heal way to give you a successful piercing. That includes studying of piercing anatomy, best practices in wound care, etc. Disposable materials used in a filthy environment (read, Walmart), does not make for a clean procedure.

JessieAlbin · November 2013

One more tidbit of info and I promise I'm off my soapbox: not all piercing jewelry is created equal, and that is especially important when you are making a decision for someone whose allergies are unknown (like a baby). Not even touching nickel, we all know that is cheap and people often react to it. Surgical steel is a term thrown around a lot in jewelry, and it is not all the same, and not the best thing to put in your fresh, healing piercing. Surgical grade steel is recommended for just that: surgical procedures. Where it enters and then quickly leaves the body. It is not meant to stay in the wound. Implant grade steel (like they use for screws and pins and stuff that stays in your body), is meant to stay in the wound, long term, without incident. Implant grade jewelry is more expensive and I don't think it is available for use with disposable gun systems. You get what you pay for.

*insert a "the more you know" gif here

maelic · November 2013

kwolslager said:

maelic said:

Nope nope nope.

For one, it's a choice she'd have to make for herself. For two, never in a million years would I let my child get pierced at the mall with a gun. Unsanitary and unsafe. She'll (or he'll!) get pierced, if she wants to, when she's old enough to go to a professional piercer.

I understand why you'd be concerned but no one uses guns anymore to pierce ears, when I had mine done at age four, it was a huge electric gun that scared the crap outta me that the store just changed the needle. Now, if you go to get it done, most places like the mall or walmart, uses plastic small hand held "manual" guns that are always opened fresh out of a package right in front of you and then thrown away. It's WAY more sanitary these days than it was 15-20 years ago. They use hand sanitizer and gloves before touching you or any of the "equipment". I had DD1's ears pierced at 3 months at a Claire's in a mall... it was all done how I just described it. Same when I had DD2's done at the Walmart. And even when my child is old enough to "decide on their own", it's as simple as taking them out, and never wearing them again. Not a big deal.

Guns in general shouldn't be used for piercing, ever. It's unnecessary trauma to the flesh of the ear, it takes a chunk out which increases the risks of infection, scarring, and keloids, nevermind the aesthetics of a poorly placed piercing because of the lack of control. Piercings should be done with a needle, by a professional, period.

Young children also have problems with their ear piercings being uneven, because of either poor initial placement or uneven growth of the earlobes. What was centered in the lobe at 1 year old is not necessarily going to be centered at 8 years old, let alone during adulthood.

JessieAlbin · November 2013

AprilMay9 said:
It seems obvious but I never even thought to take a kid to a professional piercer for their ears. Didn't know they did that since it seems below them. Good to know @jessiealbin!

Most reputable professional piercers will pierce ear lobes on minors who are old enough to care for them properly. Educated and ethical professionals generally will tell you "no" for your own good from their knowledge and experience, and the nice ones will tell you why. @maelic raises a very valid point on placement. Anatomy moves as you grow, and a professional who will bum you out now to save you trouble later is a gem.

Calla123 · November 2013

I had it done at 9 months old and loved having my ears pierced. I was going to pierce my daughters ears but couldn't do it.....I just kept thinking "why am I doing this? Because it looks cute? She doesn't even have a choice..." So I didn't do it. I teach kindergarten and some of them had a special day with their moms to get it done on their 5th birthday so I think I might do something like that IF she wants it. Baby #2 will be the same.

JessieAlbin · November 2013

@aprilmay9 the general consensus from piercers I have worked with is 8-12, at discretion for maturity. (Any minor who ever pitched a fit in the studio was turned away immediately). I would do your research on what studio you would feel comfortable working with and then ask their policies.

acrookston · November 2013

My DH is Puerto Rican so we would do it for cultural reasons.

Airynn Chica · November 2013

Yes we will and we did with DD. We did them at Claires when she was 2 months and she never cried (Though the claires' lady gave us a 10 min warning lecture that she would and that her ears would stick out) The cleaning was easy and she wasn't bothered all. Never had an infection and she just ignores them.

It is cultural for my husband though that his daughters have pierced ears. She is so cute with them. Love it!

Airynn Chica · November 2013

My ears were pierced with a gun both times, and having just felt my holes, I do not have bumps in my holes like one person said.

All the gun does is push the stud through your ear. At least when my DD was pierced, that's how the gun worked. No extra needle in the ear. Only the stud went into her ear.

Love reading the debate though.

On the side issue of circumsision-- it can also be a cultural thing as it is for my husband's culture. And I always said I wanted my DS to match his father. Yes, I know there are many women that hate that argument, but it's valid for my family.

JessieAlbin · November 2013

Airynn Chica said:
My ears were pierced with a gun both times, and having just felt my holes, I do not have bumps in my holes like one person said.

All the gun does is push the stud through your ear. At least when my DD was pierced, that's how the gun worked. No extra needle in the ear. Only the stud went into her ear.

Exactly: the gun pushes a blunt stud through your ear, which is way rougher on the tissue than it needs to be.

reillyea · November 2013

I would like to wait because like you for me itwas a special thing I got to do when I turned twelve. However, my husband is all about it so we may end up getting them done. I never thought of it as an awful thing just that the girl should be able to have a sayin it.

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