I'm a new mom with a six week old baby boy and I'm hitting some major problems in my relationship. DH and I had a huge blowout this afternoon because for the third time since I became pregnant (a pregnancy he was excited for) he has been caught having inappropriate conversations with other women from his past.
I try really hard to give him the benefit of the doubt each time he blows it, but a little part of me still feels like he needs to be monitored - enter Me, snooping through his phone. Each time I snoop, I find a new girl. I'm not going to apologize for snooping when I never fail to find something - he could look through my devices at any time and never see conversations that were inappropriate.
Anyway, this guy always acts like there isn't anything wrong with our relationship. But now he is complaining that since we've had our son, I am unappreciative of him, I never flirt or show affection - I generally seem unhappy. It sort of sounded like he was using these reasons as justification for entertaining women outside our relationship.
I am hurt. Disgusted. Furious. The list of emotions could go on and on, but at the end, what is really feel is exhausted. Exhausted from trying to explain what respectful behavior is, tired of being a stay at home mom to a colicky baby, and I'm tired of feeling like I can't trust him. I also don't think it's fair that he's identified postpartum depression in my moods and instead of trying to help and support me, he uses it as an excuse for why he acted like d-bag...
Tonight he moved all of his things into the guest room at my request.
So I'm wondering...how do we get past this? I love him but I am really worried that this won't get better after all the damage that's been done. Any tips for dealing with this, or with him, greatly appreciated.