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Really ?!?!

trulylovinlifetrulylovinlife member
in August 2013 Moms
I had to go pick up my little brother from work tonight. His job is 10 minutes away. I asked my husband to just listen for our LO who was sleeping. Apparently something spooked the dog while i was gone, causing her to bark and wake the baby. So instead of letting her self soothe and go back to sleep , he went into the nursery , unswaddled her , and took her downstairs to play video games and wait for me to get home. So now 45 minutes later I'm still trying to get her back to sleep and he's snoring across the hall !!!! Ugh !!!!!
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Re: Really ?!?!

  • BunnyferBunnyfer member
    Oh I would have killed him...LOL...He wakes LO up all the time...and I usually have to get her back to sleep
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  • trulylovinlifetrulylovinlife member
    I never make him get up with her in the middle of the night and the one time I ask him to help out he does EVERYTHING I told him not to ! She still is fighting going back to sleep . Did I mention I have to be up at 530 to get ready for work and get her to my parents before work ?! It's gonna be a LONG day !
    I love my husband . I love my husband lol. Just gotta keep reminding myself that
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  • MommyBoltyMommyBolty member
    I wouldn't be too hard on him. He was just trying to do what he thought was best. Maybe if it happens again you can ask him to keep you company while you get LO back to sleep.
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  • Ffrey1119Ffrey1119 member
    Agree with pp lots of the daddy's don't know really what to when babies cry so they pick them up. In that moment that's what he thought was right.

    I won't be to hard on him, he got her to stop crying, and was keeping her company, most women don't even have this option.

    Just be thankful he is around and since it's his first go around remember your both still learning, you will look back and laugh at this years from now
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  • MissyCeeMissyCee member
    magdalina.h said:
    I would be PISSED if my husband let my daughter cry it out and try to soothe herself.
    Yep, me too. If you were having trouble getting LO back to sleep, you could have asked H to help you out and rock her for awhile or something.

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  • trulylovinlifetrulylovinlife member
    If she was screaming hysterically of course I would have wanted him to pick her up. But when I asked what she was doing he said she was kicking her legs a little and grunting. Which is what she does every night , then she settles back in and puts herself back to sleep. She was not wet / hungry / nothing. And while yes I appreciate having him there to help , had he let her lay there for a few minutes , she would have put herself bac to sleep.
    I don't want to sound unappreciative because he is a great husband and dad it was just frustrating at the time and I needed to vent
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  • PB102012PB102012 member
    @trulylovinlife I am sorry that happened and I am glad you finally got little one back to sleep. I just think many of us would have benefitted by your definition of "self soothe" during your initial post (baby awake vs baby crying). Clarification helps me understand your frustration. I hope your day gets better.

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  • lkobriantlkobriant member
    I found that having DH take equal responsibility for bed time and MOTN stuff (we split 50/50 and trade off nights). He knows when he needs to intervene and when not to. He also knows what is appropriate when he has to act. DS does the same grunt/wiggle and since DH puts him to bed half the time he knows to just let him be for a few minutes. Just a thought. Maybe get him more involved. They don't know if they don't do it.
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  • CaliforniaDream87CaliforniaDream87 member
    lkobriant said:

    I found that having DH take equal responsibility for bed time and MOTN stuff (we split 50/50 and trade off nights). He knows when he needs to intervene and when not to. He also knows what is appropriate when he has to act. DS does the same grunt/wiggle and since DH puts him to bed half the time he knows to just let him be for a few minutes. Just a thought. Maybe get him more involved. They don't know if they don't do it.

    This, exactly. OP, if you're saying he never gets up with babe at night how is he supposed to know what to do? Caring for an infant isn't easy. Give him more responsibility and you won't be so annoyed.
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