Fed Up With OB (vent)

ALHolli · November 2013

I'm looking to switch OB offices. I had an appointment Thursday and I had a third doctor try to terrify me out of wanting a VBAC. Which is funny because at my 6 week postpartum check, I was told I was "an excellent candidate" for a VBAC. Now that I actually want to, they're telling me horror stories and focusing on the 2% chance of rupture instead of the 98% of not.

Also at this last appointment I was told I'm scheduling a 40 week c-section whether I want to or not; DD was only 3 days late. I told him I'm not comfortable evicting LO til he's ready, but he pretty much laughed at me, and then talked about "when we do the section" like VBAC wasn't even an option anymore.

Also got laughed at for 1. possibly wanting more than 2 kids and 2. wanting to try to surrogate later on.

I was up for a good portion of last night just pissed off about it all. I have no idea what I'm even looking for, but I got the names of a couple OB's who deliver at my same hospital (the hospital was really nice, if I can keep it, I'd like to. Right down the street) so I'll start by asking them how they feel about VBACs. I want to look into a doula maybe? Have no idea where to start but I'll figure something out. I'm 90% sure I still want the epidural, I just want some support for VBAC instead of constantly being told I can't do it.

What's the point of offering it if all you're gonna do is tell me each visit there's a 2% chance I'll die, all the horror stories you've seen in the past, and hand me paperwork and pamphlets on the dangers of VBAC? Thanks for activating stubborn bitch mode on probably one of your most laid-back repeat patients.

ALHolli · November 2013

@FarmBoysWife

The only thing that sucks about trying to pick who can't be there, is that it's one of those practices with 6 different doctors and they make you rotate because anyone could be working the night you deliver. Aforementioned douche was 1 of 2 of the doctors who did my first section with DD. I'm hoping by using the same hospital but different practice will help eliminate him being my doctor again this time.

He was nice after DD was born, which is a shame he's such a dillweed now. I used to like him.

ALHolli · November 2013

I'm also kinda still wanting to have a hospital birth JUUUUUST in case something does go wrong while pushing. Then I'm already there and don't have to suffer an ambulance ride :S

ALHolli · November 2013

Ah, see, I didn't know I could tell them to GTFO. Whenever I try to mention something that isn't on the Pregnancy Assembly Line they pretty much argue me back into line. Which since last time was my first time around, I just went with cuz it was easier. I'm not asking the world of them, which is why I'm pissed off. The only call I've made to them was 14 weeks ago for an advance on my Zofran. It just bugs me ugh.

babylimas · November 2013

Definitely find a new OB. It's not worth the stress! Funny enough I just switched to a high risk clinic and they are the most supportive of vbac. They act like it's no big deal and no reason not to try. I love the nonchalance of it! I actually said something to the tune of, well now I will just get a c-section and not stress about the vbac. To which the doctor replied it was silly and just do the vbac. Haha

ALHolli · November 2013

@FarmBoysWife

responded

Thank you!

awhitworth926 · November 2013

Switching OBs was one of the best things I've ever done. You will feel so much more at peace with someone who supports you!

jennybean80 · November 2013

Fingers crossed things work out for you and you find a doc/practice who is more willing to help you towards your VBAC! Can I ask why you had a c-section the first time? Might impact the info the doctors are giving you.

ALHolli · November 2013

Thanks everyone! I've put out a call for help with direction on my local moms page and got referred to a local women's hospital that actually sounds better than the one I delivered at (though further away, eek). They have a group of midwives there. Also got some direction in hiring a doula, though it's all just info gathering at this point.

I've never switched my doctor before, especially midway through pregnancy lol. Kinda nervous but hopeful about the change.

ALHolli · November 2013

Jenstwins said:

Fingers crossed things work out for you and you find a doc/practice who is more willing to help you towards your VBAC! Can I ask why you had a c-section the first time? Might impact the info the doctors are giving you.

I really don't know. They told me DD's heart rate dropped with each push, I pushed for 20 minutes. But when she came out there was no cord tangled, nothing obviously wrong, etc. It occurred to me last night that they might've made it up to get me out of there since it had been near 24 hours of labor.

lillybelle30 · November 2013

You might want to check with the hospital to see if they have issues with vbacs. I've done 3 vbacs. My OB was a big proponent of vbacs. My 3rd vbac was almost stopped by the hosoital, however. They wanted to refuse to allow me and when my my doctor insisted (he was pissed and I heard him fighting with the nurses in the hallway), they finalky caved. However, they made me sign a bunch of waivers with very scary disclaimers. It was so scary that I was in tears with indecision while I was in the hospital bed (which, of course was the hospital's goal with those papers). In the end, all three vbacs were successful, but the last experience was not as positive as the other two because of how the hospital treated it

[Deleted User] · November 2013

The user and all related content has been deleted.

SomersIsles · November 2013

ALHolli said:

Jenstwins said:

Fingers crossed things work out for you and you find a doc/practice who is more willing to help you towards your VBAC! Can I ask why you had a c-section the first time? Might impact the info the doctors are giving you.

I really don't know. They told me DD's heart rate dropped with each push, I pushed for 20 minutes. But when she came out there was no cord tangled, nothing obviously wrong, etc. It occurred to me last night that they might've made it up to get me out of there since it had been near 24 hours of labor.

I would definitely look into a change. I can't imagine having to deliver a baby amongst such frustrating people. I can only imagine how hard the process is regardless... we don't need difficult "professionals" making it even harder.

Is there a way to see if they have a track record for pushing towards c-sections? I'm wondering if that's their frequent go-to plan. Just because your first baby may have had a tough time during delivery doesn't mean your second will (i'm assuming) ... so I don't see why VBAC should be avoided so aggressively. Who knows...

Keep us posted!

legallyginger · November 2013

Ugh, I'd be dropping that doc like a hot potato. I'm glad you're putting feelers out and are getting some good recs! You definitely need to be working with someone that won't belittle your goals.

ALHolli · November 2013

@TallAsh

The women's hospital I'm looking at has midwives on staff, looked like there were a lot of them. And the 6 or so people who suggested them all said they loved the midwives and had a great experience at that hospital. So I'm optimistic about that if we can't afford a doula.

@SomerIsles

I have no idea how I'd go about looking up their track record. On the review site I found, my original hospital had five 5-star reviews in different areas, but the women's hospital has seven. In my local mom's group, I'm gonna say 97% of them just had their second kid (I think only one or two hasn't) and they all had a repeat c-section. They're all in the practice I'm leaving and delivered at my original hospital. And in the new moms groups I went to all DD's first year, almost all of those who were at my hospital had had c-sections. So it seems the rate is very high. I'm sure there's factors that led to me meeting these women specifically, I know my c-section recovery pain lent to my PPD which is why I went to the support group, so results may be skewed.

jennybean80 · November 2013

I agree with PP, first babe having heart rate issues in no way means you'll need another c- section. Hope the new practice is good to you!

LolaBelle11 · November 2013

If you are going to switch, which it sounds like you should, do it soon. I tried to switch last time I was pregnant and they wouldnt let me because I was 1 day over 25 weeks pregnant. Some insurance have a deadline for switching.

ALHolli · November 2013

@LolaBelle11

Yuck, didn't know that. I'll be making more calls Monday when everyone's open. Thanks for the heads-up.

Want a personalized experience?

Fed Up With OB (vent)

Re: Fed Up With OB (vent)

Choose Another Board

Search Boards