EP vs Nursing?

jswaja1@udallas.edu · November 2013

Any moms out there make the decision to exclusively pump versus nurse or do a combination of the two? I'm struggling with this decision, and haven't made it yet, but am leaning towards EPing.

LO was born 10 weeks premature, so between her being in NICU for 7.5 weeks and their regimented schedule, we were just not able to really get the hang of nursing, plus she got used to the bottle and sometimes will refuse the breast altogether. It's emotionally taxing for me and frustrating, I'm sure, for her.

I know I shouldn't care, but one reason I am hesitating is I know my family will be disappointed ,even though in still giving only BM)...

Just need some encouragement.

fluttergirlmoonchild79 · November 2013

I basically EP'd with DS. We were on the NICU too (not as long) but to get him off the feeding tube we tried bottle feeding with pumped milk. He did better with it and it helped me out because DH could do some middle of the night feedings with my stashed milk. Breast milk is breast milk whether it comes from the source or a bottle. I wouldn't give a damn what anyone else thinks.

jennifertewart · November 2013

Yeah I would not care what my family thought nor is it any of their business... I just think you should do whatever you feel the most comfortable with. If nursing is too stressful or frustrating then it is not worth it!

LibberDuck · November 2013

I agree with all of the above. When I had my first DS, I switched to formula after about 2 to 3 months because we never really got the hang of BFing and I was so stressed about it. I was actually getting depressed over it. When I finally switched, I was actually a much happier person which made me a much better mom. I dealt with a lot of guilt over switching, but I was so much happier that it didn't much matter to me once I'd done it. Seeing as you're still giving just breastmilk, I say to hell with others disappointment!

This time, I've been mostly BFing, but also pumping and supplementing with formula.

PirateMonster · November 2013

Take care of your own stress/health and you'll end up giving the best you can to your LO. If nursing doesn't work out and EP does, fantastic, it's still breast milk and you can get some help with feedings.

I plan on trying nursing, but I'll need to do a mix at least when I go back to work, so I figure I'll just see how things go. Baby will get what they need.

cagoldi · November 2013

I agree with PPs. I haven't even been home a week and I've been doing both. I know I have some family members that don't love that fact but that won't influence my actions at all.

Pumping is hard work, too. Do whatever it is that saves your sanity.

jswaja1@udallas.edu · November 2013

Thanks everyone. Sure makes me feel a lot better. I think that since they were all able to nurse fully, that they think that is the only way to go, and they don't understand why I wouldn't do the same.

Jfila13 · November 2013

My older son had a cleft lip & palate, and he could not BF effectively. I chose to pump, and I set a goal of 6 mos. There are many websites to help you make a plan & get started. Most recommend every 3 hours for 12 weeks to establish your supply. I did this, and then I could be much more flexible- a long stretch at night, etc.

It did end up taking a lot of time as you go on- I made a lot of milk, and it took a while to pump it toward the end of the 6 mos. I would def suggest a hospital grade pump- I used Medela symphony; it was covered by my insurance bc of his cleft.

Other advice: get a car adapter and set up and pump in the car. Huge time saver when you start to get out. Also, test frozen milk soon- my son would NOT drink my frozen milk, which was a huge disappointment!

By the time 6 mos came, I did stop because it did start to interfere with my time with my son. I was also about to turn 40 and wanted to try to have a second baby.

Good luck to you! I will say, too, that there are many folks out there that seemed to be a little smug about pumping not being as good as the real deal- it was a little disheartening given the commitment I made to the pump and giving my son exclusively BM for his first 6 months. Ignore them- the support on this thread is wonderful!

I hope your little one does great!

Marinowski · November 2013

I pumped while my Lo was in the nicu. Now we do a combo of bf and pumping since she got used to a bottle in the nicu. BF was a bumpy start but she is getting better and pumping means she can stay home with my dh when needed. Do whatever makes the most sense to you

MrsBynum0505 · November 2013

LO isn't here yet for me, but I'm anning on exclusively BF until she's 4 weeks old then added a bottle in (should be right before Christmas time). My family is the opposite. They all make fun of me because I was to have a natural birth and breast feed. Not their kid and not their decision. Do what's right for you. I'm lucky that DH is willing to work more than 40 hours a week so that I can stay home with the baby for at least 6-9 months which also played a huge role in my decision. If I had to go back to work if consider exclusively pumping.

Lindsayloring1 · November 2013

All of the above! I was able to nurse Astin while we were in the hospital the first 2days, but after that she wasn't able to latch well- she has a deep latch, and I have short nips :-( EP is the way we are going, and so far it has been great. She is still getting the breastmilk which I feel really great about. I don't care what other people say about it not being the same as breastfeeding. My MIL tried to pull that stunt and I locked it up pretty quick :-) GL!

gwenneh · November 2013

It just wasn't possible for me to feed DS2 while he was in the NICU and I was recovering. He couldn't be brought to me because he was on oxygen and drips, and I couldn't get to him since I was on the ward recovering from the C-section and blood loss. I'm EPing now, doing pretty well with an excess, pumping every 3 hours since he was on 3-hourly feeds in the NICU.

With D-MER kicking my ass, I'm having trouble deciding whether to continue breast feeding at all, let alone between EPing and on the breast. I've set a goal of making it to the next breastfeeding cafe date in my neighbourhood, which is Wednesday, but ultimately the lesson I learned from DS1 is a functioning mama is a happy mama. The poster that said do what you need to do to save your sanity is right.

thelastunicornxo · November 2013

My second son was born with a cleft palate (diagnosed at birth) and it was impossible for him to nurse. I was devastated about missing out on bf, but we ended up exclusively pumping for 6 months and it ended up being fine. We still bonded, he still got bm, and he thrived and is a normal, healthy two year old now. I tried for about 3 weeks to bf him and it was so emotionally taxing and just didn't work.... But pumping did!
Choose what works best for you and your babe! Good luck mama!

lilybeth12 · November 2013

My bff EPed for 6 months with her son. She had a true emergency csection and was hospitalized with complications for 9 days. By the time she was well enough to try bfing her ds was having none of it. It was a lot of work, more work than simply being able to bf. Her dh would do the middle of the night feedings while she pumped. I am really proud of her for making it to six months.
I wish you luck in your decision and hope that if you do have to suppliment you dont feel a failure. Lots of healthy ff babies out there

Zilly13 · November 2013

Don't ever let anyone make you feel bad for the choices you make. As long as you are feeding your baby, and she's growing, you are doing the right thing. And it's equally important to make yourself a priority, too. If you choose to BF directly but are miserable constantly from the stress, what benefit is there to your LO? I very much believe that the mother's emotional well-being is as important as the baby's. Whatever you decide to do, please don't beat yourself up about it!

wendy2613 · November 2013

You absolutely should not feel bad about pumping only, Thats what your lo is used to and there was nothing you could have done differently to change that. Also I think it's great that your still giving the lo breast milk which will help keep his immune system up. Keep your head up Momma! Sounds like you are doing a great job.

Glitteraati · November 2013

Fully agree with smilz - breastmilk is breastmilk, no matter if it comes from the breast or bottle. I had all intentions of EBFing but DD had major frustration issues with breastfeeding and it turned into a completely stressful situation for both of us. My breasts were becoming engorged since she was just snacking on my breasts, so I had to start pumping, and found it a much more relaxing experience for both of us. Sure it's more work but it's what's working for us both. Good luck!

Eshirley26 · November 2013

Zilly13 said:
Don't ever let anyone make you feel bad for the choices you make. As long as you are feeding your baby, and she's growing, you are doing the right thing. And it's equally important to make yourself a priority, too. If you choose to BF directly but are miserable constantly from the stress, what benefit is there to your LO? I very much believe that the mother's emotional well-being is as important as the baby's. Whatever you decide to do, please don't beat yourself up about it!

All of this! We are in week 5 in the NICU, it's hard. Give yourself a break and some credit! I've ended up doing a combination of pumping, BF, and formula. (I'm having issues with producing enough). This was not part of my "plan", but it is what it is.
Just keep doing what you can to ensure that LO is healthy and take care of yourself!

bmqcmg · November 2013

I tried BFing with DD and had to supplement with formula shortly after since she was not gaining weight. She ended up refusing my breast all together and after 6 weeks I completely switched over to formula.

This time around I will be EPing. My problem is my breasts since I have inverted/flat nipples and know that I am going to have a hard time BFing again so I'm just pumping from the beginning.

Gsk4874 · November 2013

My girls were 8 weeks early and were introduced to bottles and pacifiers before I could breastfeed. I pumped every 3 hours so they could gave breasttmilk, now that they are home I bottle and breast feed and still pump. It's a lot of work! As long as they are getting your milk that's great! I don't know how much longer I will continue to nurse them..they take a bottle great. It's hard to EBF after they have been in the NICU and are so used to bottles already, I would say do whatever is easiest for you and your baby,

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