TTC unsuccessful after one year:(

heatherw427 · November 2013

Hi ladies, I am feeling a little down today. We have been trying for a year now without any luck. I started my period today. I called my ob-gyn this morning. If I wasn't pregnant this month they would like my husband and I to start fertility testing. We are both 38. Does anyone have any words of encouragement?

I am at work and so want to go home and have a good cry:'( Thanks, Heather

ksgsmu · November 2013

I am so sorry you are here... you should get testing done and get treatment from an RE. At age 38 you shouldn't waste time with an OBGYN. They are fine for testing but not treating as it is not their specialty. Proper testing can rule out many things, get you a diagnosis so that you can make a plan to move forward. Getting the testing done and a plan will help you feel like you have more control.

I would check and see what if any fertility testing your insurance will cover. I was shocked when I found out ours covered nothing.

We do weekly check in on Wednesdays so feel free to post on that. Also the TTTC board is very helpful and can guide you through the testing phases. The ladies are super helpful!

heatherw427 · November 2013

Thanks for responding Ksgsmu:) good advice! We are so new to all of this and it seems overwhelming. I will definitely check in on Wednesday. I have heard most insurance companies don't cover fertility treatments. Sad.

HeathernSteven · November 2013

Don't assume anything about your insurance. Definitely look into what they will pay and I second @ksgsmu, get to an RE stat. Ob catch babies, RE's make babies, don't waste time at the OB

latershrader · November 2013

Hi Heather. I just passed my year mark last month, so I know how you feel. I have to work w/ my OB for insurance reasons...but I was happy to find out that if I stick w/ her for 6months, I'm covered w/ the RE for 50% of almost everything. This is after I was told I wasn't covered at all w/ the RE. So just keep being your own advocate in this crazy mess of TTC.

This is a great place to get advice and vent. All the ladies here are super nice and always helpful! And we all hope that we don't have to be on this board forever though. GL to you!!

mamalovesR&R · November 2013

The year mark means nothing! Don't EVER give up!! My first DD took two years to conceive and my 2nd daughter took THREE!! The year mark is not the end all/be all of your hopes. It WILL happen. I used to hate it when people said that to me but they were right, twice!!

Maelien · November 2013

Welcome. I hope your stay here is short. I have to agree with PP. If the OB isn't going to aggressive about IF testing, then move on to an RE. I was 35 and my OB had us try for a year as well. What a waste of time!

Also, I know it's hard to get your period every month and the disappointment just builds. But don't ever give up hope. You haven't had any b/w or other testing done. It could be something really simple. Or if it's more complicated at least you will know and can advocate and educate yourself.

Also, go home and have a good cry. It always makes me feel better. And wine, too, if that's your thing

You found a great board. If you want I can give you a list of the b/w the initial tests should be looking for.

PrivateOne · November 2013

Sorry you are struggling. We all know what yuo are going through and are here to support you in any way we can. Definitely get to an RE for testing to see whats going on. Once diagnosed, you'll be able to proceed with a protocol just for you that will help you get your BFP. Unfortunately, fertility coverage is all over the place with insurance companies. However, some states have mandates that require coverage (I think it is 15 of them). You may be in one of those states. Check out your specific coverage. Also, make sure you find a good, experienced RE, they aren't all the same. Perhaps you can get suggestions from folks on these boards.

Keep us posted and if you have any questions for us "seasoned" IF gals just ask. It can definitiely be overwhelming, but before long you will be well versed like the rest of us.

turgi · November 2013

Hi 41 yrs old here. If u have the coverage I would start seeing a fertility specialist immediately.:) this past year when we started thinking about having a baby we basically just started off with a fertility specialist instead of OBGYN and not even because we thought something was wrong it was just the logical route. They test you for so many more things besides just FSH levels and are usually much more attentive and helpful. They are there to help get u pregnant not just help u after the fact. They will give u ultrasounds and X-rays and blood tests and see what shape your uterus and hormone levels are in. They ended up finding a teenie polyp in my uterus ... We had it removed.. And I was preggo 2 months later! Going on 22 weeks right now:) but my husband and I also started preparing 3 months before conception ... We went all organic... No caffeine... Or alcohol .. i started prenatals...and I did fertility acupuncture and husband got his guys tested as well. Good luck!..... Oh I also had them test my vitamin D levels which came back Super Low so took a high dose of Vit D to get back up to normal and get your AMH Level checked too

Nootbar · November 2013

I second @ksgsmu. We wasted way too much time with an ob, who inexplicably wouldn't move forward on my testing until DH got an SA. He dragged his feet and turned out to be fine; meanwhile my diminished ovarian reserve was diagnosed precious months later than it should have been...

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