While staring at my bathroom trash can full of BFNs

Re: While staring at my bathroom trash can full of BFNs

• TaylorH84 member

  November 2013

  I'm sorry o2 I wish I could say something comforting for you

  2013- 2 IVF cycles with PGD to prevent genetic disorder from being passed on. Both BFFN

  2/2014 pregnant!  EDD 10/17/2014
  

  
  

  All always welcome!

       
  

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• O2girl member

  November 2013

  I just want off this flipping roller coaster NOW! Just left a message for my RE about stopping my meds.... And now I just want to drink

  Me: 38
  DX:  Adenomyosis, Compounded MTHFR, PAI-1 4G variant
  
  DH: 34
  MFI due to Testicular Cancer
  
  Married March 2012
  IVF w/ICSI #1
  10 little polar bears
  FET #1 with 2 polar bears ~Nov 6, 2013 BFN
  FET # 2 with 2 more polar bears ~March 19, 2014 BFP!!!
  Beta 1= 276
  Beta 2= 662
  4/19/14 ~ baby A became an angel
  5/02/14 ~ baby B became an angel
  5/3/14 ~ D&C
  FET #3 with 1 male polar bear ~October 3, 2014
  October 13, 2014 ~ BFN
  Fur Children:  Memphis 3y, Dutch 3y, Marcel 2y, Meadow 1y
  
  
  
  
  January 2015 Siggy Challenge TTCAL
  Animals Interacting with Snow
  
  
  
  

  
  

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• Sunny B member

  November 2013

  I'm so sorry
  

  TTC since May 2012
  Me: 32 H: 31
  

  DX: MFI-Very Low Count, I have Hashimotos.

  IVF prep September 2013 cancelled due to Ovarian Cyst
  IVF #1 October 2013 Antagonistic Protocol with ICSI  ER 10/31/13 (18R 16M 11F- 6 blasts to freeze)
  ET delayed due to OHSS 
  FET scheduled for July 8. Delayed due to a crazy high TSH (it had been under control for YEARS!)
  FET #1 8/5/14 sET BFN 

  
  

  All welcome!

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• krdesi member

  November 2013

  Take the trash out and no more pee sticks and ultrasounds for you until Monday!

  
  

  **Siggy/Ticker Warning**   

           
                TTC #1 since May 2012

                May 2013: First R.E. appointment

                DH: SA is good

                 May 2013: CD3 Blood work-normal
             June 2013: Hsg-Right tube blocked

                 July 26, 2013: Starting Follistim for IVF #1

                August 2013: IVF #1 Cancelled- Abnormal embryos

           October/November 2013: IVF #2 w/ICSI

                      November 8, 2013: Transferred two early blasts (no frosties) 

  November 18, 2013: First EVER BFP! 

  Beta#1: 91  Beta#2: 288

  1st U/S- 5w2d Saw yolk sac!

  3rd U/S- 7w4d HB of 157bpm!

  TEAM BLUE!

         http://movingtolight.blogspot.com/

       

                                      

                                      

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• amcastord member

  November 2013

  So sorry...

   

   

  
  

  

   

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• O2girl member

  November 2013

  Thanks but .. I'm back to crying.... And I don't think I will be doing this again... It's just too hard. I never thought I would be this devastated.

  Me: 38
  DX:  Adenomyosis, Compounded MTHFR, PAI-1 4G variant
  
  DH: 34
  MFI due to Testicular Cancer
  
  Married March 2012
  IVF w/ICSI #1
  10 little polar bears
  FET #1 with 2 polar bears ~Nov 6, 2013 BFN
  FET # 2 with 2 more polar bears ~March 19, 2014 BFP!!!
  Beta 1= 276
  Beta 2= 662
  4/19/14 ~ baby A became an angel
  5/02/14 ~ baby B became an angel
  5/3/14 ~ D&C
  FET #3 with 1 male polar bear ~October 3, 2014
  October 13, 2014 ~ BFN
  Fur Children:  Memphis 3y, Dutch 3y, Marcel 2y, Meadow 1y
  
  
  
  
  January 2015 Siggy Challenge TTCAL
  Animals Interacting with Snow
  
  
  
  

  
  

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• cachoque member

  November 2013

  So sorry!

  
  

  TTC #1 since August 2011 w/ unexplained IF
  09/12-11/13: 3 TIs, 3 IUIs, ICSI/PGS IVF & 2 FETs
  08/14: Our little miracle has FINALLY arrived - 3 years after we started trying!
  

  

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• kz's_girlygirl member

  November 2013

  I'm so sorry you are dealing with so many ups and downs I'm definitely drinking right now, after a support group meeting no less, so no judgement! ((Hugs))

  
  
  
  TTC since 2008
  Dh:34, no issues.  Me:31, Endo, slightly hypothyroid, deformed ovary, paracentric inversion.
  4 Gonal-F, Cetrotide, HcG, Crinone +TI cycles= all BFN
  Lap in 2012 to remove large unresolving cyst discovered endo and double lobed ovary.
   6 Gonal-F, Cetrotide, HcG, Crinone IUI cycles= All BFN,
  1st IVF w/ICSI- June '13 Antagonist: Gonal-F, Menopur, Ganirelix, HcG, Estradiol, Crinone= 7 retrieved, 4 mature, 1 unfertilized, 2 abnormally fertilized, 1 normally fertilized.  2DT of only embryo and our miracle BFP.
  Our beloved baby boy was born sleeping Oct. 13, 2013 due to pROM/IC/Uterine infection.
  2nd IVF w/ICSI- Feb. '14 EPP/lupron/antagonist: Estrace, lupron, HGH, Gonal-F, Menopur, HcG, PIO, lovenox, doxy/dex.=21 retrieved, 16 mature, 15 fertilized!!  5dt of 1 blast/ 6 frozen. BFP!  Beta 1 9dp5dt:83.9  Beta 2: 11dp5dt: 145.2  Beta 3  14dp5dt: 497  Please be our sticky rainbow baby!
  
  
  

  
  

  
  
  

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• RunCC37 member

  November 2013

  I'm sorry, O2girl I had to remove all TTC/IVF items from my sight a few weeks ago because it was making me angry and sad and crazy. Kick that garbage to the curb, take out only the meds you will need until Monday, hide the rest along with the pee sticks. I'm sorry it is so up and down... it's so hard. {{hugs}} Hang in there!

  **SIGGY WARNING**

  
  

  Me: 32 DH: 35  TTC#1 since March 2012
  

  Dx: Poor Embryo Quality, Arcuate Uterus, Poor Uterine Blood Flow, Mild Endo, 

         Protein S Deficiency, Sjorgen's Syndrome 

  
  

  IUI #1-5: BFN

  Laparoscopy & Hysteroscopy: minimal endo, partial septoplasty

  IVF #1: 10R/6M/6F ~ Day 3 ET = BFN

  IVF #2: 14R/9M/5F ~ transfer canceled ~ all embryos arrested at 1-2 cell stage

  IVF #3: 9R/5M/5F ~ 1 frosty!

  IVF #4 (FET #1): BFN

  
  

  IVF #5 (DE IVF #1 with Dr. KK protocol): Currently PREGNANT!!!!!!

  Synthroid + Prednisone + Metformin + Baby Aspirin + Supplements Galore = 15+ pills a day

  Lupron + Lovenox + Delestrogen + IVIG + B/W = 2-5 pokes a day

  19R, 17M, 17F - transferred two Grade A blasts 11/16, four frosties!!!

  Beta #1 11/24 (13dpo/8dp5dt) = 367 ~ Beta #2 11/26 (15dpo/10dp5dt) = 709

  Beta #3 11/29 (18dpo/13dp5dt) = 1,997 ~ Beta #4 12/1 (20dpo/15dp5dt) = 3,403

  
  

  
  

  
  

  My Blog: Running and Dreaming for Two ~ All are Welcome!

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• happygirl1013 member

  November 2013

  sending you big hugs

  IVF #1 Oct 2013- cancelled 
  IVF #2 Mar 2014- success.... baby girl born 11/28/14
  FET #1 Mar 2016- baby boy due 12/16/16

  
  

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• princessisadora member

  November 2013

  (Big hugs)

  *Losses mentioned*

  Me: 34 DH:32

  TTC #1 since Dec 2011

  HSG = tubes clear, bicornuate or septate ute; MRI= severe arcuate uterus no septum seen 

  SA #1 low count, low morph;  SA#2 4% Morph, count OK  SA#3 july 2014= NORMAL!!!

  9/2013  IUI#1 w/Clomid 100mg = over response; cycle converted to cryoocyte IVF

  IVF #1: 9/15 ER= 9 mature eggs, all eggs made it thru vitrification

  10/23 ICSI 6 fertilized; 10/28 5dt of two morulas. Hold on to me babies, stick, stick, stick!!

  11/6 BFP EDD 7/14/14 Beta #1= 18; 11/9 Beta #2= 44.8; 11/12 Beta #3= 7 = Early loss @4w6d. No frosties

  Feb 2014 Hysterscopy = no septum seen ute all clear in the inside

   IUI #1.1 4/2/14 Beta on 4/16 BFN

  Thinking about IUI #2  RE advised to try 3?????

  Natural cycle surprise BFP 8/3/14 EDD 4/11/15  beta#1(8/5/14)=35 Beta#2(8/8/14)=22  CP/Early loss@5w

  PAIF/SAIF Welcome

  My Blog 

  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

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• Lm92599 member

  November 2013

  So sorry your feeling this way. Keep taking your meds.. you never know. I am so sorry again.
  

  Me: 35  low AMH, normal FSH
  DH: 31 Fair DNA fragmentation test Normal SA
  TTC: since March 2012
  
  09-21-13 start IVF #1
  10-04-13 ER 6 eggs, 6 mature, all 6 fertilized. 3 frozen
  10-08-13 fresh transfer canceled due to high progesterone
  waiting for FET
  10-18 started BCP
  10-29 baseline appt scheduled
  11-20 scheduled date of FET #1
  12-2 BFN
  
  3-1-14 moving on to the next step. Switched RE. going to plan 3 IUI cycles while saving for IVF#2
  
  April 2014- IUI#1  BFN
  May 2014- IUI#2 BFN
  June 2014 IUI#3 BFN
  
  Taking a break for a while, focusing on our wedding.
  
  Sept 24th missed period! Surprise natural BFP
  10-15-14 first ultrasound
  06-05-15 EDD
  
  
  
  

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• loveblacklab member

  November 2013

  I'm so sorry. IF is so, so hard.

  
  My Food Blog
  DH and I: Both 31
  HSG, bloodwork, SA-possible blockage in right tube Continue TI July 2012 August 2012: Clomid 50mg + TI=bfn, switched RE September 2012: Redo HSG-blockage in right tube confirmed November 2012: Clomid 25mg, Bravelle + Trigger + IUI= ectopic pregnancy December 2012: emergency laparoscopy and D&C, removed right tube 2 more IUI's-one bfn, one CP IVF #1=CP FET#1=BFN IVF#2-converted to FET due to PGS testing and high progesterone levels. Only one good embryo from PGS-didn't survive thaw. transferred 2 embryos from IVF #1=BFP! 2 yolks sacs seen at 5w4d sonogram!

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• Jill Wheat member

  November 2013

  It is terribly hard!  I am sorry you are going through this.  I also gazed at my collections of hpts willing them to get darker.  My husband made me throw them all out no matter how light or dark they were to help me stop imagining.  I am not sure that I am going to do hpts this second time around as they created so much emotional chaos!  I tried to find something that was a little challenging to do to keep myself busy for the last few days of the 2WW.........but it was horribly difficult to concentrate on anything.  Even so, having that project gave me something to go to when I felt like destroying the house.
  

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• kjf114 member

  November 2013

  I'm so so sorry

         
  
  Me: 28, DH: 30 TTC since March 2012
  PCO & MTHFR Homozygous/Severe MFI (undescended teste & double hernia as baby)

  12/12: 50mg clomid= bfn
  1/13: 100mg clomid= bfn
  2/13: 100mg clomid= bfn 
  6/13: IVF/ICSI (x1 4AA)=BFFN ~49R, 44M, 33F, 14 frosties  OHSS
  8/13: FET #1 (x1 4AA)=First EVER BFP 4dp5dt!! d&c @ 6.5 wks, blighted ovum
  10/13: FET #2 (x2 4AA)= BFP 4dp5dt! Twins!!, perfect u/s then spontaneous m/c @ 5 wks
  11/13= RPL/Karotyping= MTHFR Homozygous c667t
  1/14= FET #3 our 2 year anniversary & hopefully our miracle

  *our little one blog*

  My Etsy Listing- Affordable Custom High Resolution Seating Charts

   

   

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• MMSchu member

  November 2013

  I'm so sorry, Hun. The IF roller coaster absolutely sucks. ((hugs))

  Siggy warning...
  
  
  

  
   

  Me:23 (PCOS)    DH:29 (everything looks good)
  9/2012: Lost my baby 6w2d
  12/2012: 50mg Clomid= no response
  02/2013: 100mg Clomid and Metformin=no response
  05/2013:150mg Clomid and Metformin=no response
  05/2013:Consult with RE
  07/2013: Bravelle=Follicles started growing, BFN
  08/2013: Time off
  11/2013: IVF #1, POAS: BFP!! Beta 11/25

  Twins!!! Due August 2014!!!
  
  Matthew&Mary MMSchu 07.21.12

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• Twinkie0612 member

  November 2013

  Definitely take out the trash. 

  I can't judge you though I threw out the wondfos from my c/p, but my FRERs are in a box with my picture of my blast, the u/s picture from my transfer, and all of my IVF papers (calendars, instructions, etc.).  I know that I should throw them away (it's kind of gross to save something you dipped in a cup of pee), but I can't right now.

  

   

  

  TTC #1 since August 2011

  My Blog

  September 2012: Start IF testing

  DH (32): SA is ok, slightly low morph, normal SCSA  Me (32): Slightly low progesterone, hostile CM, carrier for CF, Moderately high NKC, High TNFa, heterozyogous mutated Factor XIII, and +APA

  October 2012-May 2014: 4 failed IUIs, 3 failed IVFs, and 1 failed FETw/donor embryos

  November 2014: IVF w/ICSI #4 Agonist/Antagonist with EPP and Prednisone, Baby Aspirin, Lovenox, and IVIG for immune issues.  Converted to freeze all due to lining issues.  2 blasts frozen on day 6!

  January 2015: FET #2 Cancelled due to lining issues

  April 2015: FET #2.1

  
  PAIF/SAIF Welcome!

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• O2girl member

  November 2013

  Twinkie0612 said:

  Definitely take out the trash. 

  I can't judge you though I threw out the wondfos from my c/p, but my FRERs are in a box with my picture of my blast, the u/s picture from my transfer, and all of my IVF papers (calendars, instructions, etc.).  I know that I should throw them away (it's kind of gross to save something you dipped in a cup of pee), but I can't right now.

  ((((((Hugs)))))) I'm sorry Twinkie.... This whole process just plain sucks.

  Me: 38
  DX:  Adenomyosis, Compounded MTHFR, PAI-1 4G variant
  
  DH: 34
  MFI due to Testicular Cancer
  
  Married March 2012
  IVF w/ICSI #1
  10 little polar bears
  FET #1 with 2 polar bears ~Nov 6, 2013 BFN
  FET # 2 with 2 more polar bears ~March 19, 2014 BFP!!!
  Beta 1= 276
  Beta 2= 662
  4/19/14 ~ baby A became an angel
  5/02/14 ~ baby B became an angel
  5/3/14 ~ D&C
  FET #3 with 1 male polar bear ~October 3, 2014
  October 13, 2014 ~ BFN
  Fur Children:  Memphis 3y, Dutch 3y, Marcel 2y, Meadow 1y
  
  
  
  
  January 2015 Siggy Challenge TTCAL
  Animals Interacting with Snow
  
  
  
  

  
  

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