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One & Done: Only child
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I think this is where I belong.

coastalmainecoastalmaine member
in One & Done: Only child
Hi everyone-

We have decided it is one and done for us...I delivered at 29 weeks after a previous miscarriage. ..both experiences were very traumatic. dS was in the nicu for 56 days, and although his stay was fairly I eventful, it is nothing I want to relive. Where there was no known cause for my pre term labor, I just can't risk another surprise. On top of that I am turning 37 and DH is 40...so we aren't spring chickens in the baby making department anymore. Being a mom is one of the most amazing, yet exhausting things I have ever done. My son is a happy healthy 18 month old and I feel content. I do feel guilt from time to time...I worry he will be lonely, worry about him having to deal with us when we are old alone. I just hope his cousins remain an important part of his life. I get a lot of 'oh no, you will want another' and frankly it makes me mad. People can make you feel like something is wrong with you just bc you only have one.
Chemical Pregnancy 2001, Married 8/8/09, TTC April 2011, BFP 5/8/11, Missed M/C @ 9wk5d, D&C 6/21/11 BFP 11/13/11 Chase Everett born at 29wks 0 days on 5/7/12 at 2 lbs 14 oz, 14 1/2 inches long.
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Re: I think this is where I belong.

  • Arcadia1114Arcadia1114 member
    Welcome! I am sorry you had such traumatic events and I'm glad you and DS are doing well. People will make comments; most respect our decision to be OAD. My ds is 3.5 and I become more certain if our decision every day.
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  • coastalmainecoastalmaine member
    Is the preemie experience part of your oad decision ?
    Chemical Pregnancy 2001, Married 8/8/09, TTC April 2011, BFP 5/8/11, Missed M/C @ 9wk5d, D&C 6/21/11 BFP 11/13/11 Chase Everett born at 29wks 0 days on 5/7/12 at 2 lbs 14 oz, 14 1/2 inches long.
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  • hopefulmom81hopefulmom81 member
    Hi Coastal,

    I wasn't very active on the May 2012 board, but I remember you from there.  I also had miscarriages prior to DD and that is definitely part of my OAD decision along with a traumatic L&D (not nearly as frightening as what you went through).

    Welcome!

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  • PB102012PB102012 member
    Welcome! I am so sorry you had a traumatic experience, but so happy to hear that your little boy is happy and healthy! I also get annoyed when people lecture me, I am hoping it will pass. 

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  • coastalmainecoastalmaine member
    hopefulmom81 said:

    Hi Coastal,


    I wasn't very active on the May 2012 board, but I remember you from there.  I also had miscarriages prior to DD and that is definitely part of my OAD decision along with a traumatic L&D (not nearly as frightening as what you went through).

    Welcome!
    Hopeful- were you on the pgal board? I thought I remembered you from there..
    Chemical Pregnancy 2001, Married 8/8/09, TTC April 2011, BFP 5/8/11, Missed M/C @ 9wk5d, D&C 6/21/11 BFP 11/13/11 Chase Everett born at 29wks 0 days on 5/7/12 at 2 lbs 14 oz, 14 1/2 inches long.
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  • coastalmainecoastalmaine member
    Thanks everyone!
    Chemical Pregnancy 2001, Married 8/8/09, TTC April 2011, BFP 5/8/11, Missed M/C @ 9wk5d, D&C 6/21/11 BFP 11/13/11 Chase Everett born at 29wks 0 days on 5/7/12 at 2 lbs 14 oz, 14 1/2 inches long.
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  • hopefulmom81hopefulmom81 member
    Hi Coastal,

    I wasn't very active on the May 2012 board, but I remember you from there.  I also had miscarriages prior to DD and that is definitely part of my OAD decision along with a traumatic L&D (not nearly as frightening as what you went through).

    Welcome!
    Hopeful- were you on the pgal board? I thought I remembered you from there..
    Yes, of course! That is where it was from. Blame my toddler-chasing brain.  Weren't we on chat for a while together too?

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  • coastalmainecoastalmaine member
    Yes!!
    Chemical Pregnancy 2001, Married 8/8/09, TTC April 2011, BFP 5/8/11, Missed M/C @ 9wk5d, D&C 6/21/11 BFP 11/13/11 Chase Everett born at 29wks 0 days on 5/7/12 at 2 lbs 14 oz, 14 1/2 inches long.
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  • KL777KL777 member
    Welcome!  I belong here as well :-)  Sorry to hear about your loss.  OAD is great.  Life is what you make it.

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