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Nervous about telling SD about pregnancy

dmstar79dmstar79 member
in Blended Families

For some of you who have read before I have it really swell.  Everybody gets along with everybody (BM, SD, Grandparents. . . you name it, we get along).  My SD (who is 10) has two siblings from her BM both under 2.  She is crazy about her sisters, however I think she likes our place on weekends because it's away from the kid crazyness and she has ALL of our attention.

We plan on telling her Christmas Eve that we are having our own child and she'll now have siblings at both places.  My SD is a sweet girl and will act happy, but I'm concerned underneath it all she'll be stressed out about the change for her.  I don't think it'll be an "I'm not loved" or jealousy thing, but more like it's a big change. . . and it will be for all of us.

DH thinks I stress way too much over things that might upset her, and often times I do put too much thought into wondering what's going on in her brain.  This year has been HUGE.  We moved in together, married and will be looking for a new house soon.  I am lucky I have managed all of this change myself.

Anyway, I don't really have a question here, but was wondering what other's experiences where regarding this type of situation or when you told SK about new siblings. 

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Re: Nervous about telling SD about pregnancy

  • MrsSledgeMrsSledge

    I'm being lazy....my response would the same as I posted here:

    https://community.thebump.com/cs/ks/forums/thread/7726250.aspx

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  • Littlejen22Littlejen22 member
    I say not to stress, deal with issues and assurance as it comes.  That said, does it have to be on Christmas Eve?  I would wait until the next time you see her so that it does not risk "ruining" Christmas in case she is upset, even if she does not say it and is mostly happy, it would be natural for her to be a little bummed.  Unless you think the presents will cheer her up!
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
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  • la79alla79al member
    2 siblings under 2 is a lot different than 1 baby.  Just make sure that everything is not all about the baby and things will be fine.  It was a huge adjustment for my stepkids (they have no other siblings) and for all of us in general.  Things are going much better now that DD is bigger and does not control what we can and can't do.  I also agree with waiting until after Christmas to tell her about it.  Maybe talk to her about how neat it would be but wait to tell her. 
    Lilypie Kids Birthday tickersLilypie Kids Birthday tickers 
                             Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
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  • MattsWifey<3MattsWifey<3

    Don't stress. My SS (8) now has 2 siblings. A sis from us (6.5m) and a bro (3mo)  from his mom... he loves his sister and brother!

     However, I wouldn't tell her on Christmas Eve. 

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  • RaeLipsonRaeLipson

    I'm wondering, why tell her so soon? I have a 9 year old step son, and we waited until I couldn't hide it anymore before telling him. We figured since there was nothing he could do about it, there was no sense in him worrying about it longer than neccesary. Plus, if anything were to happen, having to tell a 10 year old about the loss of a pregnancy would be very hard

     

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