Taking Dad's rights away for not giving son McD's

KTdidit · November 2013

short version: 5YO boy wanted McD's. Dad said no more fast food, options are anything else or no dinner. Kid picked no dinner. Now they are trying to take away Dad's rights. WTF

https://money.msn.com/investing/news.aspx?feed=AP&date=20131108&id=17089625

VedaFlash · November 2013

I can remember several times when I didn't get what I wanted for supper I didn't eat. If I didn't like what was made, I wasn't eating. Taking away my mom's rights to me for that would have sent me into the system. Wonder how much better THAT would have been.

dannie2011 · November 2013

Now that is just nuts.

twister22 · November 2013

That's just stupid. The wacko psychologist & judge both need to be fired.

Pinkpenguin+ · November 2013

twister22 said:
That'a just stupid. The wacko psychologist & judge both need to be fired.

This. Absolutely ridiculous!

+just+j+ · November 2013

Stupid.

KTdidit · November 2013

If this was legit the way judges think I'd have lost DS a long time ago. There's been plenty of times he's gone to bed early and hungry because he wouldn't eat

Ilumine · November 2013

And at the SAME TIME, there are people who are suing McDonalds for creating obese children.

You cannot have one and the other.

Pamelacake · November 2013

I caught part of this on the news.. so ridiculous

Wahoo · November 2013

Reading the article, you don't know the backstory. It seems the mom and dad have been fighting in the courts for over two years, and with information that the article / reading public is not privvy to. This is about more than McDonald's.

Also, he took his son home early because the son was throwing a tantrum. Who on this board would appreciate their ex dumping a tantrum-throwing child back home early? And if your kid came home that way on a regular basis, wouldn't you want to end the weeknight (school night) visits?

Not defending refusing your kid junk food, but just pointing out that you can't judge the psychologist's findings on one dinner episode.

Nineoceans · November 2013

Wahoo said:
Reading the article, you don't know the backstory. It seems the mom and dad have been fighting in the courts for over two years, and with information that the article / reading public is not privvy to. This is about more than McDonald's.

Also, he took his son home early because the son was throwing a tantrum. Who on this board would appreciate their ex dumping a tantrum-throwing child back home early? And if your kid came home that way on a regular basis, wouldn't you want to end the weeknight (school night) visits?

Not defending refusing your kid junk food, but just pointing out that you can't judge the psychologist's findings on one dinner episode.

Yes you can. Unless the father is a predator who sexually or physically abuses the child then no interested father should have their weekend parenting time reduced so severely.

I think this is absolutely crazy

SueBear · November 2013

I'm side-eyeing the dad for sure, and wonder what happens on the other weekends. I'm betting the child comes home upset and agitated on the other Dad-visits as well, and that the dad is generally controlling or trying to use the kid to get to the mother. If the Dad has a history of dumping up an upset, crying, kid on his ex, that may be the reason the psychologist wants supervised visits. I'm betting there is plenty of ammo against the dad in those court records that are undisclosed in the article!

"All I did was tell my son he couldn't have McDonald's" sounds reasonable, but IMO it's not even really parenting. It's not as if dad planned a night at Applebee's or any other place and the kid refused to eat. Dad was basically saying "It's my way - or no food."

I don't allow my kids to eat fast food all of the time, but I don't start off with a nasty confrontation where they are in tears. There is no reason for a 5 year old to have a temper tantrum over a restaurant or for a father to tell their kid they won't have any dinner if they make a choice their dad doesn't like. Most well-adjusted kids do not behave that way. I just think there is a lot going on that we don't know about.

CFjo2010 · November 2013

SueBear said:
I'm side-eyeing the dad for sure, and wonder what happens on the other weekends. I'm betting the child comes home upset and agitated on the other Dad-visits as well, and that the dad is generally controlling or trying to use the kid to get to the mother. If the Dad has a history of dumping up an upset, crying, kid on his ex, that may be the reason the psychologist wants supervised visits. I'm betting there is plenty of ammo against the dad in those court records that are undisclosed in the article!

"All I did was tell my son he couldn't have McDonald's" sounds reasonable, but IMO it's not even really parenting. It's not as if dad planned a night at Applebee's or any other place and the kid refused to eat. Dad was basically saying "It's my way - or no food."

I don't allow my kids to eat fast food all of the time, but I don't start off with a nasty confrontation where they are in tears. There is no reason for a 5 year old to have a temper tantrum over a restaurant or for a father to tell their kid they won't have any dinner if they make a choice their dad doesn't like. Most well-adjusted kids do not behave that way. I just think there is a lot going on that we don't know about.

All K eats with BM is fast food. I don't allow the kids to eat fast food. There have been SEVERAL times when K (who will be 8 soon) has flat out refused to eat when I don't go get fast food for her. Sorry kid. If you don't want healthy food and you want to be stubborn, go ahead and starve. And K is hardly neglected or abused. Sometimes kids throw temper tantrums to push boundaries and see what they can get. Kudos to this dad for not caving and letting the kid eat crap food. All that would do is reenforce bad behavior.

SueBear · November 2013

Jo - I'm assuming that you have food in front of K that she refuses to eat, which is not what happened with the dad according to this story. I also assume that when K has a temper tantrum that you don't just take her back to BMs house and dump her there. Both of those actions by the dad make me think he is making other poor choices.

I'm sure K's mom paints herself to be a saint, and if you listened to her side of the story, you would believe that, but there is more than one side!

Littlejen22 · November 2013

I agree with SueBear that there is likely more to this story and that the Dad likely did more than refuse to buy McDs. I also understood this to read something more along the lines of, you want to throw a fit then I won't get you any food. Totally different.

hopanka · November 2013

You don't just dump a hungry, tantruming kid on the mom early because you don't know how to deal with the kid when he resists you. That would be way too easy (you're not a babysitter, you're the father)...and then who gets to deal with a hungry, upset child all night long? The mom does. Not cool.

So, if the dad wants credit for parenting his child correctly, then he should have dealt with the situation from start to finish (until the end of his scheduled parenting time) and then bring the kid to mom's home with a wrapped dinner meal that he deemed nutritional. That way, he did not give in to the child, but still did not dump a hungry kid with no dinner on the mom.

CFjo2010 · November 2013

I found a few different articles about this dad, and there were a couple that said he offered the kid ANYTHING instead if McDonald's and the kid refused. The plan was to go to their "normal" dinner spot and the kid threw a tantrum demanding McDonalds. It sounds like the kid had other choices and refused. And then mom immediately took the kid to McDonald's upon drop off.

I'm not agreeing with the Dad dropping the kid off early. But the mom sounds like she was looking for anything to gain leverage in the ongoing custody battle. And the psychologist in this case talked to the kid and the mom, but not the dad? Sounds pretty one-sided.

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