There are a few of us due with our second. Someone brought up the idea of a sprinkle to me...I had no idea what a sprinkle was.
What are your thoughts on sprinkles instead of showers... Anything goes here... Thoughts, ideas, yes/no....
I've seen friends who have had them, but up until then (about a year ago I guess) I had never heard of a sprinkle before.
In theory, if someone offers to throw you one, I guess it's whatever. Personally, I think once you've had your first baby and you've had your shower(s) you're done. Throwing parties for each baby seems kind of AWish to me. While the person intending to throw it may have good intentions, I don't know that invitees wouldn't side eye someone for having one.
That's just my opinion though. If I was invited to a sprinkle, I would politely decline, particularly if I had been to a shower for this person's first child. I'm sure you will get a wide variety of opinions on the subject, this is just mine.
I think they must be a regional thing. I have never heard of anyone having one aside from on TB. Family and friends send gifts for second babies when they are born, but no one throws a party for a second time mom. I definitely won't be having one since they just aren't done around here, but I think I would be uncomfortable with it regardless. But I'm super awkward and hate attention so I'm just relieved (and grateful of course) to have gotten all the showers for my lifetime out of the way.
BFP#1 11-26-10 MMC 1-13-11
BFP#2 6-8-11 Eleanor Beatrice born 2-15-12 BFP#3 9-4-13 Benjamin Lee born 4-28-14
From a potential attendee standpoint, I don't think I would attend a sprinkle unless it was my sister of BFF or something. And still I would probably side-eye them in the most loving possible way. Same thing goes if I ever get invited to a shower that requests "no clothes" or "cash gifts." If you are going to tell me the kind of present to give you, I'm just obnoxious enough to do the exact opposite and not include a gift receipt.
BFP#1 11-26-10 MMC 1-13-11
BFP#2 6-8-11 Eleanor Beatrice born 2-15-12 BFP#3 9-4-13 Benjamin Lee born 4-28-14
My mom threw a nice shower for my sister's first baby, which included extended family and friends, food and cake, the usual deal. As immediate family, we all chose to do a very small, not really organized sprinkle for each of her other two babies. We were all excited for her and wanted to give her something new for each baby. It was my mom, our other sister, and my sister's MIL and SIL. It was super small, informal, pretty much her showing up in her MIL's backyard and we were hanging out by the pool with some gift bags for her.
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
I personally don't like the idea. I've known people who have gone to one only because they felt obligated too and weren't very happy. The only time I could see doing it is if there is years in between, like 10.
I would decline a sprinkle if it were offered to me. I think in theory a sprinkle is not a terrible idea, but IMO too many moms use them as a second baby shower registering for and expecting extravagant gifts again.
Around here, if the second child is a different sex than the first, they usually have a diaper drive or small "sprinkle" for the mom. If its the same sex, usually they don't get one. However, one of my friends had a baby girl, a year later had twin girls, two years later had another girl and someone threw her showers for all 4 of her kids. She had so much stuff, she gave me a bunch of brand new clothes as "hand me downs". *not complaining!*
I personally don't like the idea. I've known people who have gone to one only because they felt obligated too and weren't very happy. The only time I could see doing it is if there is years in between, like 10.
The two sprinkles I've seen friends have, their older kids were 2 and 1 respectively. It's like "Hi! You just had a baby! You don't need more parties!" One of them, baby #2 was the opposite sex, but still, it was side-eye city over here for a while.
I would decline a sprinkle if it were offered to me. I think in theory a sprinkle is not a terrible idea, but IMO too many moms use them as a second baby shower registering for and expecting extravagant gifts again.
This exactly. I had another friend (not a sprinkle friend) who full out registered for everything again. I don't know if she got rid of her baby stuff or what, but I thought that was weird.
ETA: The only real "second shower" or "sprinkle" I won't necessarily side eye are the ones where mom has a child from a previous relationship, and the family of the SO/BD/DH wants to throw a shower for the new LO. I get that a shower is to "welcome the mom-to-be to motherhood" but I think in this instance, it's okay.
In my family all of my cousins have had an actual shower for all of their children. I didn't mind it but after the third it's a little much. I think a sprinkle is a good idea or a better idea than an actual shower. But to each their own.
I don't see a problem with them like others might. I feel like every baby deserves to be recognized. Especially if the baby is the opposite sex of the first baby. I don't think they need to be extravagant like a shower, no registries and all that, but a nice get together among family and close friends. Most of those people would most likely give you a gift for the baby at some point anyways.
I think it's a Southern thing, but many of my friends have had "sip-n-see"s, instead of Sprinkles. In essence, you're invited to come and see the baby after they're about a month old. Then people tend to bring little gifts, personalized trinkets, clothes, etc, not the general baby gear that you would see at a baby shower. Also, a gift is not expected, it's more to just come and see the baby, show support, and eat cake. I would not ask to have one, but if I have an opposite sex baby, I don't think I would turn it down. We have a lot of pink stuff here.
I would never do an organized sprinkle that involves mailing invites and stuff like that. One shower, that's it. I know I could not stop my sister and mother from surprising me with a few gifts at a random informal gathering if they wanted to do that. I guess maybe that doesn't even really count as a sprinkle in the way that others seem to define it as. I do not have a problem with a situation where one parent is a first-time parent when the other has a child. If my DH had a child already, and I was having my first, I know my family would still throw one, even if DH's family opted out, and vice versa. I think that's a more unique scenario though. Families enjoy hosting showers for their loved ones, they get something out of it as well, and I see nothing wrong with that.
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
I see no problem with them, unless it turns into a huge formal shower again. If there's a big age difference I think another shower is fine. I was unaware of the whole taboo until TB, since around here it's common to have some kind of get together for any baby. Everyone says it's to shower the mom with gifts, but it's not called a mommy shower. I just think it's a very regional dependent thing.
ETA: I wasn't planning on anything, but a friend said she wanted to do something for two of us who are due with our second (of a different sex). It will likely just be a small girl's lunch with a few gifts of clothes. Flame away.
I don't know of it is different as I am in Asutralia but EVERYONE I know with 1+ child has had a baby shower for each baby. I've just been to one even though the first baby was only 12 months old. I've never heard of a sprinkle before...
My work always gives 2nd time moms a "sprinkle". Basically, it's just to give them diapers and wipes, and an excuse to socialize and eat cake. I can't see someone registering for their 2nd baby...kinda tacky. Unless the last child they had is over 10 years old...then, I could look the other way.
I totally don't get the reasoning that it's okay if the second baby is a different sex. Especially if they are mostly for essentials like diapers and wipes. IMO they should be for everyone or for no one, depending on what is the norm within your social circle.
BFP#1 11-26-10 MMC 1-13-11
BFP#2 6-8-11 Eleanor Beatrice born 2-15-12 BFP#3 9-4-13 Benjamin Lee born 4-28-14
I feel like showers (or whatever sprinkles are) for the second baby are fine. If someone offers to host a shower for you and your second baby, why not? I just went to a baby shower for a friends second kid. She at first did not want one, because for some reason people think it's tacky. But every single woman that came to that party was more than excited to be there, and they asked for no presents and did not create a registry, so people bought clothing and just loved it!
I'd totally do it with my future second child if someone offered. Those that think it's tacky or offended don't have to show up, and they will miss out.
I'm not sure that there ever is a "right" way to do these things. Some people say it's ok if they babies in the family are more than x# of years apart - who dictates that? Some people say it's ok if they are different genders. Some people think every baby should have a party.
The only generally unanimous thing I see is that each baby shouldn't be a cause for a huge registry and a gift grab, and telling someone they are throwing you a party. Other than that, do what you are comfortable with if someone offers.
Married 08.06 Started TTC 05.08 Me: Stage II endo, borderline high FSH DH: perfect 1 lap, 5 IUIs = 4 BFNs and 1 c/p 2 IVFs, 2 FETs = 1 BFN, 1 c/p, 1 ectopic and finally a sticky BFP in May 2011!
I think they are fine in certain circumstances. For example, last year my cousin had a sprinkle for her baby girl; her friend threw it for her because her son is now 7 years old. My cousin wanted it to be more about getting everyone together than presents, but she still did a small registry (mostly of essentials). My other cousin, was due a few months after her, with the same sex baby (but her oldest is 8), with a different guy, and her future MIL threw her a FULL fledged shower. It was ridiculous.. she refused anything handed down too.
I think that having a sprinkle for a same sex baby when the age difference is 3 years and under, is a little bit much. I can see it for a different sex baby, but only if the age difference is at least 2 years.
This my second, DS is 26 m/o, and even if I have a girl, I would not want a sprinkle. I think my mom would be the only one throw me one, and I don't see her doing that.
"Sprinkle" is just another word for shower, IMO, and showers are to welcome a woman to motherhood, not celebrate the baby, and that should only happen once.
I've had several neighbors that had their 2nd (or 3rd) child in recent years. The ladies in our circle gathered for wine & cake and all donated cash toward a gift card. Very low key, but still a nice way to celebrate baby and help out the parents.
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early June, progesterone plummeting.Another loss. August 2013 - started Donor Egg process, but surprise BFP with my own eggs.
Dear Son born 5/28/14
I just have to say...I completely thought this was a post about the ice cream kind of sprinkles, and I got really excited. (And I totally know what a baby sprinkle is, you can just see where my mind is today!)
I try to keep up with the terminology that comes with being a first time mamma-to-be, but what on earth is a Sprinkle? From what I read above its a mini shower for a second baby?
My friends wanted to throw me one but i have asked them not to. My son is going to be 9 next month and yes we have nothing from when he was a baby left but I dont feel right having one. We are going to have a bbq/family gathering once the baby is here because we have family in other states.
My friends wanted to throw me one but i have asked them not to. My son is going to be 9 next month and yes we have nothing from when he was a baby left but I dont feel right having one. We are going to have a bbq/family gathering once the baby is here because we have family in other states.
@krysfran1979, I think you should totally have one! Haha. You need baby stuff girl!
As for me, this is my first. Not sure about how I feel about it yet. I guess I'll know once I'm pregnant with my second and see what I have from my first. I don't like the attention parties bring, so most likely I'd opt out.
I don't like the idea unless there was like 10 years between kids or it's for a second marriage. If one was offered I would decline. My work often does them, both for moms and dads to be, and I might be more inclined to accept that since it's really an excuse to eat cake, but I'd still try to say no.
I think if someone offers to throw you one, go for it. In my opinion, each baby deserves to be celebrated. If someone offers to throw one for me, I will just make the guest list very small0 family and very close friends only. People enjoy honoring moms-to-be, even if it is a second baby.
Me: PCOS DH: No issues
August '16-January '17: Clomid + HCG + IUI/TI = BFN February/March '17: Menopur + HCG + IUI = BFN April '17: Menopur + HCG + TI (due to too many mature follicles) = BFN May '17: Took off due to cysts June' 17: Menopur + HCG + IUI = Cancelled due to 8+ mature follicles November '17: Clomid + HCG + IUI= BFN December '17: Menopur + HCG + TI= BFP!!!! Due August 2018
I'm kind of horrified at the idea of having one knowing how people really feel about them. But that said, in my family there is no way to avoid it without deeply hurting the older generation. It is something that started out of so many late term losses, miscarriages and whatnots. Our family has had way more than its fair share...way more. The aunts started it as a way to celebrate the end of a long scary pregnancy full of complications. I honestly never thought twice about them until I came on here and saw how many people thought they were in bad taste. I even threw one for my sister.
I know my aunt and sister are already planning one for me. I'm pretty sure my own best friend is going to refuse to come and I'm embarrassed. But again, nothing I can do.
One of my BFF's wants to throw me one since we are expecting a girl this time, and since we found out we were having a boy last time, we have no gender neutral stuff. I'm not super comfortable with it but she really wants to do it...if I go along I will not be registering (in the hopes that people will not feel the need to buy anything at all, but if they do, will perhaps just buy an outfit or something), and I will probably just be inviting a handful of people (think mom, sister, and about 5-6 friends) who would certainly be getting a baby gift anyway and I know would not side eye "having" to get me another gift.
BFP #1 6/28/11 ~ EDD 3/7/12 ~ m/c 7/15/11 at 6w2d
BFP #2 8/29/11 ~ EDD 5/12/12. 4/25/12: Our take home baby is here! BFP #3 8/27/13 ~ EDD 5/11/14. 4/27/14: Our second take home baby is here!
I have attended two sprinkles where the guest list was limited strictly to the aunts and grandmas of the baby and best friends of the mom. Both were less than 10 guests and very low-key. I think it all comes down to how big of a 'production' it is made into: no formal invites, no registry, no favors, etc. For one sprinkle we all met at a local restaurant for brunch and everyone covered their own meal and the other was just a light brunch at a friend's house. That being said, if I was invited to a sprinkle that wasn't for my sister, sister-in-law, or one of my best friends, I would politely decline.
My first thought is that it's kind of like a shower... in that the host should not be the guest of honor. Don't throw one for yourself. But they could be a good idea if you have a kid or kids of one gender and know you're having the opposite... or years apart or some other such reason why the mom to be wouldn't have what she needs already. (I've mentioned in another thread my church does baby showers for all first time moms. The one time we've done a sprinkle was for a lady who had two boys, SEVEN girls, and was pregnant with a boy again. She got lots of boy stuff at that sprinkle.)
I wish I would have had one for my girl after the shower, for a boy, because I was totally freaking out about not having any girl stuff... but I hold to my rule of not hosting one for yourself, so we got by. People can get by without showers too, but it's nice when people want to host one for you. :-)
"Sprinkle" is just another word for shower, IMO, and showers are to welcome a woman to motherhood, not celebrate the baby, and that should only happen once.
This exactly. Naming it something cutesy doesn't change what it is.
I personally don't think it's a big deal to have showers or sprinkles for 2nd time moms. My family throws them for each baby and I don't mind going, I'm going to get them a gift anyway. This is my first baby and am excited for each stepping stone. I think each baby/pregnancy is special and each deserves it's own shower.
Where I live, or at least in my circle of friends and acquaintances, showers are the norm for every baby. Not sprinkles, not family-only mini-showers -- they might be on a smaller scale with a smaller guest list, but they're still showers, and the women still register.
I've never met someone who couldn't stand the idea of a shower for a second (third, fourth, or eleventh) baby. And I assume if I did know someone like that, they probably just wouldn't buy a present or show up. Their preference is their problem, no one else's.
DS: 11/8/11 | 9 lb 7 oz, 22 in DD: 5/22/14 | 9 lb 9 oz, 21.5 in
Re: Sprinkles? Thought?
In theory, if someone offers to throw you one, I guess it's whatever. Personally, I think once you've had your first baby and you've had your shower(s) you're done. Throwing parties for each baby seems kind of AWish to me. While the person intending to throw it may have good intentions, I don't know that invitees wouldn't side eye someone for having one.
That's just my opinion though. If I was invited to a sprinkle, I would politely decline, particularly if I had been to a shower for this person's first child. I'm sure you will get a wide variety of opinions on the subject, this is just mine.
BFP#3 9-4-13 Benjamin Lee born 4-28-14
BFP#3 9-4-13 Benjamin Lee born 4-28-14
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
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This exactly. I had another friend (not a sprinkle friend) who full out registered for everything again. I don't know if she got rid of her baby stuff or what, but I thought that was weird.
ETA: The only real "second shower" or "sprinkle" I won't necessarily side eye are the ones where mom has a child from a previous relationship, and the family of the SO/BD/DH wants to throw a shower for the new LO. I get that a shower is to "welcome the mom-to-be to motherhood" but I think in this instance, it's okay.
It’s not that I don’t like you, it’s that I don’t know you. Stranger Danger.
ETA: I wasn't planning on anything, but a friend said she wanted to do something for two of us who are due with our second (of a different sex). It will likely just be a small girl's lunch with a few gifts of clothes. Flame away.
BFP#3 9-4-13 Benjamin Lee born 4-28-14
Started TTC 05.08
Me: Stage II endo, borderline high FSH
DH: perfect
1 lap, 5 IUIs = 4 BFNs and 1 c/p
2 IVFs, 2 FETs = 1 BFN, 1 c/p, 1 ectopic and finally a sticky BFP in May 2011!
1 FET in Aug 2013 = BFP!
I think that having a sprinkle for a same sex baby when the age difference is 3 years and under, is a little bit much. I can see it for a different sex baby, but only if the age difference is at least 2 years.
This my second, DS is 26 m/o, and even if I have a girl, I would not want a sprinkle. I think my mom would be the only one throw me one, and I don't see her doing that.
1st BFP-8/17/12! Missed Miscarriage discovered @ 8 week US. D&C.
2nd BFP-2/13/13! Blighted Ovum discovered @ 8 week US. Natural miscarriage.
3rd BFP-5/22/13! By early June, progesterone plummeting. Another loss.
August 2013 - started Donor Egg process, but surprise BFP with my own eggs.
Dear Son born 5/28/14
comes with being a first time mamma-to-be, but what on earth is a Sprinkle? From what I read above its a mini shower for a second baby?
As for me, this is my first. Not sure about how I feel about it yet. I guess I'll know once I'm pregnant with my second and see what I have from my first. I don't like the attention parties bring, so most likely I'd opt out.
August '16-January '17: Clomid + HCG + IUI/TI = BFN
February/March '17: Menopur + HCG + IUI = BFN
April '17: Menopur + HCG + TI (due to too many mature follicles) = BFN
May '17: Took off due to cysts
June' 17: Menopur + HCG + IUI = Cancelled due to 8+ mature follicles
November '17: Clomid + HCG + IUI= BFN
December '17: Menopur + HCG + TI= BFP!!!! Due August 2018
I know my aunt and sister are already planning one for me. I'm pretty sure my own best friend is going to refuse to come and I'm embarrassed. But again, nothing I can do.
BFP #1 6/28/11 ~ EDD 3/7/12 ~ m/c 7/15/11 at 6w2d
BFP #2 8/29/11 ~ EDD 5/12/12. 4/25/12: Our take home baby is here!
BFP #3 8/27/13 ~ EDD 5/11/14. 4/27/14: Our second take home baby is here!
I wish I would have had one for my girl after the shower, for a boy, because I was totally freaking out about not having any girl stuff... but I hold to my rule of not hosting one for yourself, so we got by. People can get by without showers too, but it's nice when people want to host one for you. :-)
This exactly. Naming it something cutesy doesn't change what it is.
I've never met someone who couldn't stand the idea of a shower for a second (third, fourth, or eleventh) baby. And I assume if I did know someone like that, they probably just wouldn't buy a present or show up. Their preference is their problem, no one else's.
DS: 11/8/11 | 9 lb 7 oz, 22 in
DD: 5/22/14 | 9 lb 9 oz, 21.5 in