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July 2012 Moms
tiredmomsclub
member
Christmas gatherings
tiredmomsclub
member
The fun has begun of planning when we get together with family for christmas. I am already overwhelmed. In the few years I've been with my H we still haven't figured out a way to GTG with everyone without us getting totally burned out.
My H parents are divorced so we have two families to see on his side. My parents are together so just the one on my side. Each parent unit likes to have a gathering with just them and all their kids. On top of that there are the gatherings with aunts/uncles/grandparents etc.
We usually have a total of about 10 gatherings/ year. It's soo much!
We tried to condense by just doing the gatherings with our parents and siblings. Even that is getting to be a lot. All the parents live about 45 mins apart and about 1-2 hours from our house. So we are spending quite a bit of time on the road as well.
It's really starting to make me dread this time of year. Do any of you have to deal with getting to see all your family? Have you learned any tricks to make it more bearable?
My H parents are divorced so we have two families to see on his side. My parents are together so just the one on my side. Each parent unit likes to have a gathering with just them and all their kids. On top of that there are the gatherings with aunts/uncles/grandparents etc.
We usually have a total of about 10 gatherings/ year. It's soo much!
We tried to condense by just doing the gatherings with our parents and siblings. Even that is getting to be a lot. All the parents live about 45 mins apart and about 1-2 hours from our house. So we are spending quite a bit of time on the road as well.
It's really starting to make me dread this time of year. Do any of you have to deal with getting to see all your family? Have you learned any tricks to make it more bearable?
Zayne born July 2012 
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Christmas gatherings
BUT everyone except FIL lives within 20 minutes of us. And FIL's brother lives close to us so we usually do that gathering there. Would it be more or less stressful for you to host one of the gatherings? That way you don't have to drive?
We have the same problem, plus we have to work things out with picking DSD up in all the mess, we worked it out to be, Christmas eve afternoon (we both get off at noon), spent at my moms, after we drop DSD off at her moms 20 mins away (damn women doesn't have a car), then head back to my aunt and uncles house that is 10 mins away same direction as my moms house, that goes until 10-11 pm, Christmas morning we have our big family breakfast, go pick DSD, come back home open gifts, go to my other aunts and uncles until 9 pm, bring DSD back to her mom's for the night only to pick her up Boxing day to head to DH's moms an hour away, sometimes we have to drop DSD back at her moms again until either New Years or DS's birthday which is the 30th.
I think ours wouldn't be so bad if DSD mother wasn't so anal about having her so much over the holidays and if she would just get a damn car. Next Year I am hoping would be easier as we told DSD that she can do whatever she wants with the holidays as she'll be 16 and if she wants to hang with her mom we will drop her off and only pick her up once, the rest she can take the bus or look at driving herself.
If anyone would agree to it I would host in a heartbeat. I think my parents would come to our house if it wasn't for my grandpa who lives right by them. He would end up celebrating alone. I think they would feel bad leaving him behind, and so would I.
Both sets of parents (mine and DH's) are still married. And most of DH's extended family is in the UK so we call them or they call us. On my dad's side there isn't anyone left alive that we are particularly close to, and on my mum's side we have two cousins and some aunts and uncles (mum's cousins) who we might see sometime between the start of December and end of January but it's normally not right at Christmas as they have their own family to do things with.
We normally alternate Christmas. DH's year we leave and get to ILs place on Christmas Eve then spend several days there (having had a Christmas meal with my family earlier in the month). Other years we have an early Christmas lunch or brunch at my parents or my sister's IL's place, and then drive to my ILs, arrive in time for dinner, and stay several days.
I may have been the obnoxious FTM last year and insisted everyone come to/stay in Sydney for Jack's first Christmas. DH was quite disturbed at me interrupting his family's tradition (SIL's husband has no close family so they always leave Sydney and go to do Christmas w/ my inlaws)... But his mother repeatedly told him she understood why it was important and reminded him that in 12 years I had always made done effort to spend at least some of dec 25 with his family.
This year my sister is expecting her first LO in November so even though it should be IL year I'm making it my family's year, and then next year will be future neice's first Christmas (SIL is due in march)...
MIL is irritated at me for skipping out on the extended family gatherings the weekend before but I told her no we are staying home and having our family of 3's celebration that weekend. We will still also have to get together with MIL's side and all the siblings sometime in January but that will be more do able.
Thanks for all of the advice and commiseration. It is much appreciated! Hopefully this year will be much more enjoyable.
"I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always.
As long as I'm living,
my baby you'll be."