is your toddler NOT cuddly?

SunAndRain · November 2013

I SAH with DD for the first 20 weeks but I always put her down for her naps. I rarely wore her around the house though I've worn her in my Ergo for outings. We've napped together maybe 5 times in her life, if not less. She gives hugs but she isn't cuddly. She won't snuggle on the couch. I've tried to get her to lie down with me a few times at night when she wasn't sleeping (she has STTN since 5-6 months, unless she is sick), but she just pushes herself up and moves around. I BF for the first 5 months, but after I went back to work my supply, which was never great to begin with, quickly tanked. But at least we had lots of snuggle time when I was BF'ing. Part of me is proud of her independence but part of me wonders if I went too far and didn't cuddle her enough!

DawnLilly · November 2013

I thought "toddler" and "cuddle" were antonyms. :P Even at 4 months DS didn't want to be held. He wanted to be on the floor rolling all over the place. He rarely cuddles now either. Mostly when we are reading books. He will randomly come to give me a hug though. He buries his head in my neck and wraps his arms around me really tight. Then, bam it lasted 3 seconds and he's already running away. I think its just a personality trait.

skibunny59 · November 2013

I think toddlers are just too busy exploring their world for cuddles. I don't think it's your fault or that you didn't cuddle her enough.

My DD is 19 months and she only really wants to cuddle when she's tired, not feeling well, or if we are in a new place and she's shy. I wore her almost all the time, held her for most her naps until I went back to work at 6 months, and she sleeps with us at night and she still nurses. So as much as I cuddled her she is still a toddler and wants to be running around most of the time.

greyt00 · November 2013

DS2 never liked to cuddle. Even in his 1st few months, when I had trouble getting him to sleep (if not BFing), sometimes I left him laying on the bed (shame on me, I know), before he could roll, and within 1 minute flat he zonked out. I guess he likes his space. He hated swaddling, too. We used a sleepsack. DS1 has always been a cuddler (and we swaddled him). He's affectionate, just not cuddly. Dioesn't like to be still long for reading, too, so I'm afraid he'll be behind on his vocabulary!

mommymegan831 · November 2013

DD was never cuddly, even as an infant I'd bring around a blanket because she'd rather be on the floor then be held. I always put her to bed wide awake because she wouldn't be rocked to sleep. She was rarely sick, but once or twice she did get very sick and I knew it because she'd lay on chest and she was never still. Now at 3 1/2 she's very cuddly. DS has always been cuddly, but as he gets older it's not as much.

harmonicbabe26 · November 2013

K has only ever been cuddly when she was sick. This is normal. Toddlers are too busy to sit still and cuddle.

christinasullie37 · November 2013

DD is not a vety cuddly toddler. I had similarthoughts. I dididn't bf, never wore her ever. I often wonder if I did th is to her. She won't sit on anyone's lap. She does like to be held often though now. However I am jot a very touchy feely person eithet.

sunnyday016 · November 2013

michyme123 said:

My LO was never really a huge cuddler. I mean as a newborn he would sleep in our arms, but was also perfectly content with sleeping on the floor, his crib, his swing, etc.

He is just too busy! He will sit on us if we are reading him a book, and will come to us for a hug and what not, but I can probably count on one hand how many times he actually just sat in my lap and cuddled just cause. I think the only times are when he is sick!

He is still very affectionate just doesn't show it with cuddles

This is exactly how my son is! He is ALWAYS moving. He never just sits or lays with us- ever!

aeh72 · November 2013

DS is affectionate - he'll run to us and give us hugs and kisses but he is definitely not "cuddly." The only time he will cuddle is when he's tired or sick. In fact, thos are really the only times he actually sits down for more than about 60 seconds! He's a ball of energy!

meg_2006 · November 2013

Pfff...DS is anti-cuddles. From about 3 months on, he didn't want to sit on our laps, just stand. He hated being rocked to sleep so we put him in the crib and he fell asleep on his own. It took me forever to teach him to hug and kiss. It has to be initiated by him or he starts yelling "No no no!" Basically any time I try to cuddle with him that's the response I get. A few times a day he might just walk over and give me a hug...that's it. The most cuddles I get is when he sits on my lap and reads a book. He was sick this past week, and the dang kid still wouldn't snuggle with me!

traveltheworld · November 2013

DS was never a cuddly baby. Even as young as 2 months old he did not want to be held. Every time someone held him for more than a few minutes he'd start crying - he wanted to be put down so he could move his arms and legs around. I BF for a whole year and hated it since DS would latch on, nurse, and then latch off and try to push me away as soon as he was done. There was ZERO cuddling and I didn't think it was a bonding experience at all.

Now that he is 16 months, he is still not cuddly. He'd come sit on my lap for me to read him a book a few times a day, but other than that, still doesn't like being held. But he is affectionate in other ways - he loves gently patting my head and runs his little hands down the side of my face while leaning in to do an eskimo kiss. He also loves holding my hand and always wants to show me stuff or "talk" to me. So that's all that matters to me!

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