Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
BumpJackie
member
Re: Second (third...) Baby?
This post has been sitting unanswered for a while, so I thought I'd try to help.
This is what I posted for a mom who was asking about helping the older child adjust. Perhaps there's something in here you can use?
DD1 was 17 months when DD2 was born.
Honestly, the most I did was read her a book about being a big sister (I'm a Big Sister by Joanne Cole. It also comes in a boy version. It's excellent. Very simple, reassuring, and doesn't focus on overcoming sibling jealousy the way so many older sibling books do. Not that the jealousy thing doesn't happen for some kids, just that I didn't want to introduce the idea of a younger sibling to DD1 in a negative way).
MIL (and sooo many other people) raved on the baby doll thing, so she got one, but DD1 had zero interest in it. She still doesn't like baby dolls. But your DS might like it and connect to it. I noticed most people who recommended it had their kids 2+ years apart, which is a huuuuuge developmental difference from kids under the age of 2, so I kind of wonder if it's more effective for older kids.
Every kid is different, but DD1 showed zero interest in DD2 when we brought her home. Like, didn't even notice she was there. She played and did her thing and looked at the baby from time to time, but she never wanted to hold her or pick her up or anything. Your DS could be the same way. From his perspective, the cats are much more interesting than a little immobile person who basically just lays there and sleeps all day, so while introducing the "gentle" concept with him is always a good idea, you might not have to worry over his early interactions with your newborn.
2u2 spacing can be hard at times, but it has so many benefits, and I think you'll really like it. I found that DD2's heavy sleep schedule made it possible to keep DD1's schedule virtually unchanged, and I got to spend almost as much time with her as I always did. Now that DD2 is older, they still don't play, but DD1 just sees her as another part of her life. She can't remember a time before her. We've never had to deal with sibling jealousy.
BFP 5/21/10, Missed m/c 7/5/10 at 11w3d (baby measured 7wks), D&C 7/7/10
Aug/Sept 2010 - CD3&10 b/w & u/s, genetic testing, SA, HSG, & Lap/Hyst to remove septum
12/09/10 BFP -- 7/05/11 DS born at 33w5d. Came home after 23d in NICU at 37w0d
June 2012 - TTC #2! -- 10/05/12 BFP -- 5/23/13 DS2 born at 37w1d! Yay full term!
Surprise BFP 6/25/14 LO#3 due Feb2015!
Honestly with the young ones (when you're dealing with two under 2), there wasn't much preparation. We really just tried not to make a big deal out of it beforehand since they don't really understand. The most I'm doing now with our 17 month old daughter is playing with her doll with her to help show her how to take care of a baby and be gentle. When they're born, we'll again as with the others include her in caring for the baby as much as we can so she doesn't feel left out. Have a basket of books nearby so you can read books to the toddler while you're nursing (doesn't always work but it's one idea).
We talk about it a lot more with the older ones who understand that there is another baby coming. They are excited!
I personally think the "laid back" approach is the best one. If you make too much of a deal out of it, they'll just get stressed about a situation that they don't really understand to begin with.
Maybe we got lucky, but our boys were pretty un-phased by a new one coming home. This time might be a game changer though. 
My first two are 23 months apart. With that one we didn't talk to her about it until after we knew her gender and therefore her name and then we talked of her often. Even though A was much to young to understand what we were talking about. We made sure we talked of how WE were having another baby. Not a new baby as we didn't want it to sound replacing. It worked well so we have continued this. Now with baby #4 we told our oldest earlier so she can share in the excitement and she knows what we mean by most of it. She remembers the her sister's birth last May and asks questions a lot about how much longer until she meets her brother (she is convinced this is a boy) we made a paper chain using the sizes of the baby from TB and talk to her about baby needs time to grow etc HTH
I have a five year gap between DD2 and 3. They obviously understood about the prospect of having a new sibling.
DD3 was six months old, when we added DD4 (newborn) and DS (two years) (via adoption) I couldn't obviously explain it to her.