Hi, I'm new here - Not sure if I belong

GraceyandTroy · November 2013

Hi, I'm Gracey. I have been lurking here for a couple weeks now and figure I should introduce myself. DH and I are both 30 and are coming up on our fifth wedding anniversary in about a month. We've always wanted multiple children but I knew as soon as we started ttc that something wasn't quite right. My cycles were all wonky and from charting and using opk's, I knew I wasn't o'ing very often, if at all.

We went though a bunch of test and eventually I was dx with PCOS. Clomid made my lining too thin for implantation, then my Dr's were worried about over-stimulation for an IUI. While we were saving up for IVF, I started acupuncture and herbal teas (cheaper than IVF, but pricey enough in it's own right). Well, those things got me ovulating, so we decided to put off IVF and eventually, after nine months of the holistic approach and two and half years total of ttc, I conceived my son who is now almost 10 months. I feel blessed that it was only two and a half years because I know that's relatively quick in the IF community.

Since he's been born, we haven't done anything to prevent. Around 3 months pp, I was ready to start ttc again, but I am BF'ing and haven't gotten regular cycles back. I have had a couple anovulatory cycles and the times that I have o'ed, my lp has been very short. I don't want to wean DS, so I have no idea when my body will get in gear. But I am also starting to experience a lot of the same emotions of longing and frustration that I felt the first time around. That's mixed with guilt now, though, because I feel like having a son already should be enough. I feel guilty for wanting another baby so badly.

When I went in to my ob/gyn for my annual check-up a couple months ago, she told me not to get worried about irregular cycles until I stop nursing all together. Since I don't plan to wean, I'm worried that DS will want to nurse till he's three and then it will take 2-3 years to get pregnant! I'm ready to have another baby now and the thought of waiting four or five years is terrifying.

That brings me to a place where I'm looking for options that are safe to do while continuing to nurse my son. I've started drinking the herbal teas (red clover and nettles) that I drank before. I am thinking of going back to acupuncture, but I became a SAHM when DS was born, so we need to figure out how we're going to pay for it.

So that's me! I hope this is a good place for me. I don't really feel like the Getting Pregnant and IF boards are the right fit. From lurking, you ladies look like a good bunch and I hope to learn from you and contribute some, too.

Jen071407 · November 2013

Welcome!

freakyfast · November 2013

Welcome! Sorry you have to be here but it's nice to meet ya.

+SouthernMomma+ · November 2013

Welcome! Im sorry you find yourself here, But I hope you enjoy your stay! :-)

pettycrocker · November 2013

Welcome

chusum · November 2013

Welcome! I'm new too.

My daughter has made it very clear she will not wean anytime soon on her own. Aside from one AF at about 2 months PP (where I somehow conceived and lost that pregnancy) my cycles didn't return until completely until 13 months PP. I learned from Kelly Mom that 13 months is actually the average for breastfeeding moms. Hopefully AF comes back and is normal sooner than later!

ScarletBegonia79 · November 2013

welcome! don't feel guilty for wanting another baby so badly. in some ways i feel like TTC #2 is much more emotionally draining than TTC #1. with #2, i know exactly what i am missing and i think that makes it harder. with #1, i knew i wanted a child but the feeling wasn't as consuming, if that makes any sense.

CheesyPeas · November 2013

Welcome! I didn't get my first PP period until a year after DS was born due to breastfeeding. I thought at that point in time I could monitor my cycles for a while and they would eventually get back to normal. It's been a really long process, and although my ovulation timing has become more consistent with time and with weaning (he still asks to nurse at bedtime most nights, and I let him although I'm pretty sure there's next to nothing in here), my LP still sucks. Your little guy is really young, so your body is still finding its way to its new normal. How often is he nursing?

tuscanbride2007 · November 2013

Welcome!

GraceyandTroy · November 2013

CheesyPeas said:

How often is he nursing?

Thanks for all the warm welcomes, everyone!

@cheesypeas, DS nurses 3-4 times a day and I pump once a day so he can have milk in a cup with dinner. I don't give him formula at all. I know once I introduce milk in a couple months, I may not nurse as often. Or maybe I'll just take out the pumping session. He pretty much nurses first thing in the morning then before naps and bed.

CheesyPeas · November 2013

CheesyPeas said:

How often is he nursing?

Thanks for all the warm welcomes, everyone!

@cheesypeas, DS nurses 3-4 times a day and I pump once a day so he can have milk in a cup with dinner. I don't give him formula at all. I know once I introduce milk in a couple months, I may not nurse as often. Or maybe I'll just take out the pumping session. He pretty much nurses first thing in the morning then before naps and bed.

That's basically where we were at too, minus the extra pumping session. We then stepped down to 3 shortly after 12 months. It was a slow process for my body to semi-regulate while breastfeeding but it ultimately did (minus my LP issues) over the course of many months. Hopefully you'll start to see changes as the months go by.

MommaInNC · November 2013

Welcome, I'm sorry you're here.

I understand all your feelings of longing and guilt. Its such a frustrating position to be in. Feeling like your family isn't complete and yet being so deliriously happy with your family as is, at the same time. We have 2.5 year old twins and we waited until they turned 2 to discuss Baby #3 for many reasons. I had GD and Pre-e and my OB told me that waiting at least 2 years between pregnancies was ideal for possibly avoiding these in future pregnancies. Also because twins are HARD! Of course when the babies turned two, DH deployed and just got home a couple months ago. We dove right in with a FET and had an early m/c. I'm "stuck" right now too, for different reasons, but I totally understand how you're feeling. Big hugs. I hope things resolve on their own and you don't have to worry about weaning. Good luck!

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