Gender reveal disaster

aeskins740 · November 2013

livfree · November 2013

I think you should pay for both cakes, even though you are both partially responsible. You are the one receiving a benefit from it, and although labeling the cake would have been smart, it wasn't her fault that you turned it over. Things happen, but I definitely think you should pay for both cakes.

Golferbee · November 2013

She def should have put a note, it wasn't even a cake box!! Also, your family will hopefully feel stupid, then excited about your gender reveal. They are acting silly!

holly820 · November 2013

Talk with your coworker and tell her that you didn't realize the cake was inside since there was no note or anything. I would offer to pay for the new cake. If she is like most people, she will not allow you to pay her for the second cake. If that is the cake, you may want to give her something small for the extra effort like a Starbucks gift card or something.

Golferbee · November 2013

holly820 said:

Talk with your coworker and tell her that you didn't realize the cake was inside since there was no note or anything. I would offer to pay for the new cake. If she is like most people, she will not allow you to pay her for the second cake. If that is the cake, you may want to give her something small for the extra effort like a Starbucks gift card or something.

I agree with this.

ring_pop · November 2013

Offer to pay for a new cake. But I don't really think that's your biggest problem right now. Your family is acting like a bunch of jerks.

livfree · November 2013

I also think your family is being ridiculous. You deserve to be happy and shouldn't let them ruin it for you.. and don't feel guilty anything with regards to your family!

AriaAmante143 · November 2013

I do a little cake decorating on the side, and IMO you should pay for both cakes. It would be different if she had dropped the first cake, but it was completed and delivered to you. Maybe she should have put a note, but once she delivered the cake to you her part was done.

Also, why in the hell are you having a gender reveal party for these ungrateful people that only care if you're having a girl??? It's not like you can choose. If it were me and my family was acting like idiots Id cancel the party and refuse to tell them anything at all.

lesleygosooners · November 2013

Offer to pay for the new cake. Hopefully, if she truly is a friend, she won't accept it anyway.

I'm sorry about your family being rude. I felt the same way. Everyone kept saying it was a boy and that they needed another boy in the family. When I found out it was a girl, I felt like let everyone down. They will get over it. The only thing that matters is that sweet little baby of yours.

htn1763 · November 2013

I agree with everyone that you need to offer to pay for the second cake.

However, why are you having a gender reveal party in the first place if it is clear what everyone's reaction is going to be? Do you really want to do that pubicly and then have to deal with people being disappointed? How is that going to be fun for you??

ceh789 · November 2013

WTF is wrong with your family? Your sister's RSVP is over the top rude.

ETA: Just use the smashed cake, imo - they don't deserve normal cake.

huskymomma94 · November 2013

Everything everyone else said. Offer to pay for the second cake. I mean...you did order a cake from your coworker and later a box was sitting on your desk. It was an honest mistake, but it was your mistake.

I agree that the gender reveal might be disappointing for you if your family are going to be assholes about it. Tell your sister to suck it. I hope everyone else gets genuinely excited once they know its a boy. Boys are amazing!

SmittyPants · November 2013

You have to offer to pay and IMO, she has to decline the offer. I agree with PPs that a gift card (something small, coffee, lunch, etc) would be a very nice gesture.

Congratulations on your baby boy and I'm sorry your family is acting like a bunch of asshats. Trust me though, once they see the baby they won't even remember they wanted a girl.

ceh789 · November 2013

Blonderedhead781 said:

My SIL even told me to "keep the baby in there until it's a boy."

WHAT? I get gender disappointment on the part of the parents but my mind is blown at extended family not only getting upset about not getting what they wanted but verbalizing that upset to the parents. Seriously - wtf.

DaisyJane11 · November 2013

I would pay for the cake, especially if I worked with the baker.

jwls84 · November 2013

I would pay for both cakes, it sucks but that's how it should be.
Now your family sounds like a bunch of babies! I wouldn't Even tell them at this point! You enjoy your cake and enjoy your little boy and screw them all! Little boys are awesome and I wouldn't trade my son for any girl in the world!

dannie2011 · November 2013

I'd cancel the party and not tell them what you are having till you deliver. They are total jerks and don't deserve to find out.

zartisterica · November 2013

Pay for both cakes. You are paying for the ingredients and the time.

bumpuser9058414 · November 2013

I'd cancel the second cake because your family doesn't deserve it, but that's just me.

jessher · November 2013

I agree with everyone. There is NO reason to be doing this for your family. Take the rest of the messed up cake home and enjoy it with your dh and forget about the second cake AND your gender reveal.

I am sorry you had such a bad set of circumstances happen - that sucks! But you will have a GREAT story to tell your baby some day!

Shobb414 · November 2013

Idk about the cake thing but I would definitely say something to your family.... SERIOUSLY! You didn't tell all the girl sperm to swim faster and all the boy making sperm to stay inside your husband !! Maybe you should say it just like that too so then they feel awkward and uncomfortable!!!!

KariB509 · November 2013

dannie2011 said:

I'd cancel the party and not tell them what you are having till you deliver. They are total jerks and don't deserve to find out.

I totally agree. I can't think of any nicer way of saying this but your family are being complete assholes about the sex of your baby. I'd like to know how they think you and your SO have any decision in the gender. You get what you get and if they're not happy with you having a boy, then they certainly don't deserve a party thrown for them to attend.

BabiesFTW · November 2013

I'd cancel your party. Not sure why you're setting yourself up for disappointment.
And pay for the second cake, if you have one.

rubylovebug · November 2013

I'm with everyone that you should offer to pay for the second cake - it sucks that there was no note, but your coworker is taking their time & skills to make another cake.

However, I'm also with most that I'd just scrap the whole party. Your family doesn't deserve a party, esp with how they're acting! Why do they want a boy so badly? I think you're going to end up hurt & disappointed, & there's no reason to be - you're having a healthy baby girl, & that's the important part. Screw anyone who doesn't immediately see that.

mamamia866 · November 2013

dannie2011 said:
I'd cancel the party and not tell them what you are having till you deliver. They are total jerks and don't deserve to find out.

I agree.

monkeybutt61612 · November 2013

I see no good coming this party. You are only going to be left with negative feelings about it. However, I would love to rub your baby boy in their faces.

Mcsweets · November 2013

I can't even imagine looking at a precious baby boy or baby girl and thinking "awww I wish you were a ______"

The ONLY time I've ever wanted someone to have a certain gender was when my friend got pregnant w/o her husband being ready for kids (looong story). She, of course, wanted a little "princess" and I thought her husband deserved to have his boy.

Screw the cake, and if you do get one, eat it all yourself

ladyglittersparkles · November 2013

Pay for the second cake
Cancel the party
You and DH enjoy the shit out of the 2nd cake and anyone who isn't happy with a healthy baby can kick rocks!

NortyLeigh · November 2013

OMG! That's ridiculous! I would be SO mad at my family if they acted that way. I would still have a reveal for friends but I wouldn't invite your family. My parents wanted a grand daughter and I am about to have a second son. When I told my mom she said "aw, I wanted to buy pink this time." She was sad for a few minutes and then thrilled to be having another grandchild, regardless of the sex. If she was seriously angry and awful to me about it, I would no longer be talking to her. I can't even imagine! Little boys are awesome! I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. Don't let them wreck your party or your joy in having a baby.

As for the cake, I would pay for both. As others have said, it's her time and supplies. She probably should have put a note on the box, but how did she know that you would pick it up the way you did? It sucks, but it's only fair. Sorry!

ewallace00 · November 2013

Take the board's advice girl! Cancel this to-be-disaster party. Don't do this to yourself and don't let them treat you like this. Congrats on the boy!!!

SurpriseAt39 · November 2013

dannie2011 said:

I'd cancel the party and not tell them what you are having till you deliver. They are total jerks and don't deserve to find out.

This ^^

Berry30 said:

I'd cancel the second cake because your family doesn't deserve it, but that's just me.

Or this ... ^^

I'd cancel 'sort of last minute'.

Tell everyone that something came up.

If they can't be happy with the sex, then they don't deserve the truth.

wearebirds · November 2013

IMO your family doesn't deserve the fun of a party that YOU are throwing. Seems like you'll do all that work just to get flack from them.

I understand being QUIETLY disappointed...but they are seriously ridiculous.

NorBar39 · November 2013

Sorry about your family

Definitely pay for both cakes. It's not worth having awkwardness at work and she paid for the ingredients and took the time to make it. Also she is not the one who dropped it (even though I agree she should have at least told you/labeled it)!!!

sopranoali · November 2013

It sounds like the cake incident is the straw that broke the camel's back...no need to be mad at the person for not leaving a note.
I've never heard anything so unkind as what your family is putting you through. You shouldn't have to endure those comments and feel guilty for what you and your husband created in nature. This isn't Brave New World and your family shouldn't say the stupid shit they're saying.
I'm the confrontational type I would call them on it if I were you.

Excitedmum35 · November 2013

I agree with the pp that I think the reason you are so mad about the cake without a note is more because your family have been REALLY rude!
Let us know how u go, if u have the party and if so whether your family grow some manners!

Want a personalized experience?

Gender reveal disaster

Re: Gender reveal disaster

“Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.” -Leon J. Suenes

“Happy are those who dream dreams and are ready to pay the price to make them come true.” -Leon J. Suenes

Choose Another Board

Search Boards