Halloween pics vent

HisChamaoleGirl · November 2013

Hey BM...would it kill you to share photos of SS on Halloween? You say it's to hard to send pics to DH but your fb is plastered with pics of YOU in costume... I'm not buying the "it's too hard" line ...

Lavender P · November 2013

That sucks. We called SS and he couldn't even tell us where they were going TOT. You know, in case we show up like some crazy stalkers. I feel your pain.

HisChamaoleGirl · November 2013

It just kills me bc of the distance photos and phone calls are just about all we have in between summers but she still can't send pics. But when he is with us she asks DAILY for photos of SS. Do I send them? Yes, bc I am not a bitch. I understand wanting to see what your child is doing when you're not around. I just wish the courtesy was extended to us ...

I can't wait until SS is old enough to send them himself

Lavender P · November 2013

Honestly, if it makes you resentful then I just wouldn't extend the courtesy of sending pictures. I agree wirh trying to be to be the bigger person and all that, but some people just will never see how they are acting. We try to be nice to BM and extend her courtesies we want, but she will never change or think to even treat DH like a person so at some point you just stop. It sucks though because it takes such little effort to text a photo and probably would mean the world to you guys but she can't even do that.

HisChamaoleGirl · November 2013

I wouldn't go as far as using the word resentful but I would say it's more than irritating. At the end of the day I am going to keep sending pics bc I know it benefits SS. I'm just glad I have this forum to vent about it.

Nineoceans · November 2013

Lavender P said:
Honestly, if it makes you resentful then I just wouldn't extend the courtesy of sending pictures. I agree wirh trying to be to be the bigger person and all that, but some people just will never see how they are acting. We try to be nice to BM and extend her courtesies we want, but she will never change or think to even treat DH like a person so at some point you just stop. It sucks though because it takes such little effort to text a photo and probably would mean the world to you guys but she can't even do that.

This is where we are with it. Bm is such an asshole that when she asks for common courtesies we just "forget" or don't do it. Actually she never asks her mom does via SS but she is also an asshole so it's easy to ignore.

Pretty soon your SS will have his own Facebook and it will be so much easier to see what he's doing on a daily basis. Hang in there

fellesferie · November 2013

So, I have to admit 2 things:

1) I do not always take Halloween pictures. I try to, but several things happen. Sometimes the kids are too wired to sit still, sometimes I wait until we get outside and it's too cold and they're wearing coats, or it's too dark... Last night I did not take any pics! I had taken some from a Fri night event, and that's the only reason I have any this year.

2) I do not send XH pictures if he doesn't ask. I used to, but he never even acknowledged them. And he has never sent me a single shot of DS while he is with him.

twister22 · November 2013

HisChamaoleGirl said:

It just kills me bc of the distance photos and phone calls are just about all we have in between summers but she still can't send pics. But when he is with us she asks DAILY for photos of SS. Do I send them? Yes, bc I am not a bitch. I understand wanting to see what your child is doing when you're not around. I just wish the courtesy was extended to us ... I can't wait until SS is old enough to send them himself

No freaking way, this should not fly. Next time BM texts that it is "too hard," respond with "BM, over the summer you asked for a picture of SS daily, and we sent them. We ask for pictures on average once every other week, and the least you can do is extend the same courtesy to us as we do to you. If sending a picture once every other week is too much, I fear that sending pictures daily to you next summer will be too much as well."

+just+j+ · November 2013

I didn't send pics of DD to XH because

1. DD would not let me take a picture. I didn't get one decent one. My sister is the only one who got a somewhat grainy pic.

2. He had the option to come get DD last night and take her Trick or Treating. He turned it down. He chose instead to stay home and hand out candy.

It is not my responsibility to make sure his lazy ass gets a picture. Besides, he will only criticize the costume, or he would have turned it into a competition somehow. That's the way things have gone lately. Not opening myself up to more unnecessary BS with him.

Wahoo · November 2013

You say it's for SS....is that so he has pics at BMs house, or because you don't want friction?

If the pictures are for SS, why not make a photobook for him (maybe not of one event, but of the summer, your year in photos, etc.)? Send it home with him (you can keep a copy at your home). That way, there is a record of all of his time with you that he can choose to share with his mom, but you are not giving BM anything.

I agree with the others who think you should put an end to sending things to BM if she can't extend the same courtesies to you.

Jo2013 · November 2013

We asked over and over too. We ended up getting one of the youngest but not the oldest.

Pamelacake · November 2013

that sucks.. & felles.. I usually take tons of pics.. I didn't get any last night =(

HisChamaoleGirl · November 2013

Wahoo said:

You say it's for SS....is that so he has pics at BMs house, or because you don't want friction? I say they are for SS because throughout the day he will say "HCG, can you take a picture of me doing xyz activity and send it to my mom?" I'm not going to say "no because your mom never sends me pictures"
If the pictures are for SS, why not make a photobook for him (maybe not of one event, but of the summer, your year in photos, etc.)? Send it home with him (you can keep a copy at your home). That way, there is a record of all of his time with you that he can choose to share with his mom, but you are not giving BM anything.Yes I do a photo book for him every summer and send it to him. I make it like a storybook and DH always adds notes to SS in it. Maybe I will just tell BM she can see all the pics at the end of the summer when he gets the book rather than send them daily?
I agree with the others who think you should put an end to sending things to BM if she can't extend the same courtesies to you.

Pamelacake · November 2013

I really like the photo book idea and will be bringing it up to DH today.

Littlejen22 · November 2013

Lavender P said:
Honestly, if it makes you resentful then I just wouldn't extend the courtesy of sending pictures. I agree wirh trying to be to be the bigger person and all that, but some people just will never see how they are acting. We try to be nice to BM and extend her courtesies we want, but she will never change or think to even treat DH like a person so at some point you just stop. It sucks though because it takes such little effort to text a photo and probably would mean the world to you guys but she can't even do that.

I would actually use now to tell her to send you pics or don't expect them during your summer.

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